New barber's on LL

[*Bob*]

Top three barber conundrums for men:

Do you get a better haircut if you go in fashionable dressed?

Should you ask for the 'product', even though you know your neck's covered in hair and you'll be showering in ten minutes?

If you're white and you've never been to a black barber, are you really a racist, deep-down?

And the one universal truth: If he doesn't show you the top of your head in the mirror when he's done, then things are a lot worse than you thought.

[Ted Max]

Three x No.

[Cassius]

Sophiesofa - so agree with you - but I always take my book with me which (a) saves me from small talk and (b) means I don't have to read any womens' magazines. Also wish the mirror could be covered up until the job is finished, I don't like spending time looking at myself in an unflattering mirror!

[Ted Max]

Three more hairdressing questions:

Accidental nudging of face by hairdresser's bust is just that - accidental. Isn't it?

Why does answering the question, "How long since you last had it cut" feel so shameful?

What are the Saturday girls laughing at in the back shop. It's me, isn't it?

[Brendan]

Ted Max Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> Accidental nudging of face by hairdresser's bust

> is just that - accidental. Isn't it?

This applies to the barber?s as well.

[*Bob*]

You may observe his hands and the scissors but DO NOT look him in the eye.

If in doubt immerse yourself in the detail of your own face or allow your eyes to glaze over, like how you stare at overhead dental lamp when the Polish dentist hygienist with the nice hair is an inch from your face. (er.. for example)

[Brendan]

I?ve actually only started going to these Unisex places over the last couple of years since I?ve grown my hair a bit longer. I always stuck to a proper barber and thought somewhere with Unisex on the window was some sort of budget brothel for students.

I must say the breasts in the face thing took me by surprise. Now I realise it may all be part of the service but I really didn?t know how to respond when a woman put her chest in my face and asked me about my holidays.

She didn?t even seem interested in the muffled response regarding the current political landscape in Turkey that I managed to babble into her blouse.

Now I?m always a bit worried for about 2 days before my next haircut. Apart from the fact that I am a very happily married man, it?s warm in those places and I blush easily.

[*Bob*]

If they offer a wash before the cut - perhaps rounding off with a brief head massage, then enjoy.

But DO NOT under any circumstances allow yourself to emit a moan of pleasure - even if you're certain it's inaudible.

I speak from experience.

[Ted Max]

Those tabards don't cover as much as you think when you're lying down, either.

[*Bob*]

Tut.. did you expose yourself whilst in the chair, Ted? Again.

[Michael Palaeologus]

I agree with Brendan, the whole breast-management thing is a real trial when approaching a bi-sexual hair-cutting emporium.

There are a number of ?5 or ?6 hair dressers up-west that are able to take advantage of the barbering skills of proverty stricken eastern Europeans or travelling antipodeans. I find them most satisfactory and use the one on Leather Lane, Holborn whenever my goldden tresses need trimming.

[*Bob*]

Mr Toppers then, Michael?

[Mick Mac]

barry road barbers is great. Just get sean the barber started on ryan air. He is funny. Always offers a beer and always say no. Timothy spall goes there so next time you are there ask for a TS. Its the new Purdy.

[LibraCarr]

Hi,

My barber was a redhead... no hair just a redhead. I had my hair cut last week and it cost me 5.50p

Regards,

Libra Carr.

[????]

Crap haircut + Beer

Decent Haircut NO beer

Gotta be the beer everytime surely?

[ruffers]

I've got clippers at home expertly wielded on occasion by mrs ruffers but I do like a trip to the barber.

Takes me back, sitting on a bench put on the seat when I was a kid with my dad at the back of the shop, I felt all grown up. Not your mum cutting your hair, proper man's barber. But when you're a kid your ears always stick out.