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Ladymuck

Ladymuck

Posted
Posted

???? Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> Lady M when I reached 1000 posts on the forum I

> posted it and then 1001.....I think you missed

> yours (1600ish already) watch and learn ;-)



*curtseys most respectfully in acknowledgement of being taught by a Master*

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  • 9 months later...
Ladymuck

Ladymuck

Posted
Posted

In the absence of Quids.


DECISION:


Diplomatic Immunity Plea rejected.


Grounds: failure of the defendant to satisfy this Court that he is entitled to diplomatic immunity. Moreover, Exhibit A (threads from the EDF) corroborates this by providing irrefutable evidence of an inability to conduct himself remotely diplomatically contrary to the EDF Regulations as laid out by Mark.


Sentence:


(1) Community Service Order:

You are required to keep the streets of ED free of snow, ice and dog poo for a period of one month.


You are to assist cooking-challenged forumites with various cooking tasks. Tasks to include:


- showing Katie1997 how to cook rice without the benefit of a rice cooker

- demonstrating to HAL9000 how to peel/crush garlic and extract juice from lemons

- aiding Helen Graves with the peeling of some 5 billion chick peas.


Furthermore, you are to give a demonstration on how to bake the best Irish Soda Bread. This demonstration to take place at 8pm 10th December at the next EDF Drinks.


(2) Exclusion Order:

You are to refrain from posting in The Lounge for a period of one month. Conversely you are obliged to post in the Drawing Room at least 50 times a day. Any inappropriate postings will result in your facing a specialist panel comprised of: Huguenot, Mockney Piers and DJKillaQueen.


(3) Curfew Order:

You are not at liberty to attend the EDF's offices for a period of one month except for the purpose of feeding and combing the Forum's mangey and flea-ridden pet dog: Woofmarkthedog.


(4) Probation order:

You are required to report to SeanMacGabann twice daily.


(5) Supervision Order:

Power is hereby given to Quids who will take overall responsibility for your supervision. Should you fail to keep the peace and/or conduct yourself in a manner appropriate to ED folk, Quids may issue whatever further penalty he deems appropriate. This could include, but is not limited to, installing you in the specially erected stocks on Goose Green where the yummy mummies of ED and their sprogs would be encouraged to have a field day (egged on by the likes of HonaloochieB, karter and VerryBerryCherry). Such an "event" would be supervised by Mick Mac.


( 6) Forfeiture Order:

For breach of Rule 5.6(A)III(xi) of Master Quids' 100s Game, your falsely claimed 100 is to be surrendered immediately and given instead to the more worthy player: Ladymuck.


You have 7 days in which to lodge an appeal with Legalbeagle.

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Ladymuck

Ladymuck

Posted
Posted

Thieving?


Well! I simply cannot permit such an allegation to go unchallenged.


Section 1 of the Theft Act 1968 states that: a person is guilty of theft if he dishonestly appropriates property belonging to another with the intention of permanently depriving the other of it. Yes indeedy.


Was there dishonesty? Nope. We are talking about a pursuit created by the elusive Master Quids. I, for once, abided by the rules. You could have played, but failed to do so in time. In other words, you lack the necessary speed and proficiency for the game.


Was there appropriation? Well, I guess it could be argued that there was. BUT...as dishonesty is manifestly absent from your most ungracious charge, then the appropriation becomes irrelevant.


Was there property? Again yes, but without the element of dishonesty you don't have a toe to stand on. Not a carpal.


Did it involve property belonging to another? Nope. The 6000 was available for all to play. Though for the avoidance of doubt, I should state that the 6,000 now firmly belongs to the highly skilled moi. Oooooh yes.


Was there an intention to permanently deprive? Of course there was! That's the point of the game. You had your chance, but you blew it.


*thinks: AMATEUR*

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