No batting please we're British!

[iaineasy]

What has happened to our cricket team?? We have forgotten how to bat and to be honest I hope we haven't forgotten how to bowl too, I'm not sure it could be any sadder after such a great summer.We will be 3 down by the end of today.COME BACK PONTING WE NEED A WIN ALL IS FORGIVEN.

[bigbadwolf]

I'm expecting Brendan the colonial to come sauntering along at any moment now with some sort of jibe against the English team.

[iaineasy]

they deserve all the jibes they get as far as I'm concerned,I am waiting for the bowlers to drag us back from the dead but to be honest I think they have more chance of a sh"?" in the queens handbag.

[Brendan]

If you've ever actually read this forum you will have noticed i'm one of the most vocal supporters of the English cricket team.

They're a bit shit at 1 days though. Although this one might be close from the looks of things.

[bigbadwolf]

You may be right there B. I never read the cricket threads as I'm not really interested in the sport. However, listening to cricket commentary on the radio can be very funny. I have fond memories of sitting in the kitchen with my dad listening to the eccentric ramblings of cricket commentators and during the summer holidays it was a regular fixture in my routine.

You're still a colonial though.

[bigbadwolf]

I'm merely an English w_nker.

[iaineasy]

me too, it's a national sport no?:))

[Peckhamgatecrasher]

The English Citizenship test can be reduced to two questions:

1. Do you like chocolate cake?

2. Do you display a wry smile when you hear the 36 passing The Oval commented on?

If you can answer yes to both questions, you are an Englishman, my friend.

[iaineasy]

hahaha yes and yes again!!

[Jeremy]

Peckhamgatecrasher Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> the 36 passing The Oval commented on?

I have absolutely no idea what that means.

[iaineasy]

Blowers the commentator on TMS used to talk about the 36 bus passing the Oval cricket ground before they put up the new stand, you could see into the ground from the road and people used to rent out there rooms in the flats over looking the ground so people could watch. some people still get up on the roofs of the flats there when the ashes are on! but they are freaks you wouldn't catch me doing that.

[Moos]

Peckhamgatecrasher Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> The English Citizenship test can be reduced to two

> questions:

>

> 1. Do you like chocolate cake?

>

> 2. Do you display a wry smile when you hear the 36

> passing The Oval commented on?

>

> If you can answer yes to both questions, you are

> an Englishman, my friend.

I like chocolate cake very much, although sometimes I think adding the cake is a bit of a waste of time, and I do particularly like the commentary on buses passing the Oval (alternatively, pigeons on the pitch). That said, I too am a bally Colonial.

[Moos]

"Those who run cricket in this country, especially at the domestic level, are for the most part a self-serving, pusillanimous and self-important bunch of myopic dinosaurs unable to take any but the shortest-term view of everything"

[Ladygooner]

What would you rather they win - the Ashes - or a few meaningless ODI's?

[Brendan]

Both perhaps?

[Brendan]

I unfortunately know far too much about England?s history, geography and global significance and far too little about celebrity, asinine television and pop music for anyone to ever mistake me for an Englishman.

[Peckhamgatecrasher]

Since it makes the wonderful anagram 'ably lilac loon' you may be an honorary Englishman.

[Brendan]

What is an anagram for ably lilac loon?

[Peckhamgatecrasher]

a bally colonial!

[Ted Max]

I unfortunately know far too much about England?s history, geography and global significance and far too little about celebrity, asinine television and pop music for anyone to ever mistake me for an Englishman.

Oooooh. The Duchess is proper narked this morning.

Tell us something about England's geography.

[Brendan]

There?s no Morris dancing South of the Thames. Something to do with the ground conditions.

[Ted Max]

No baiting please we're British.

[Brendan]

Mostly flat and damp with a few unimpressive peaks in the middle.

Oh wait no, that?s their batting line up.

[EDKiwi]

Brendan Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> Mostly flat and damp with a few unimpressive peaks

> in the middle.

>

> Oh wait no, that?s their batting line up.

lol, brilliant :)

[bigbadwolf]

"Mostly flat and damp with a few unimpressive peaks

in the middle.

Oh wait no, that?s their batting line up."

See, what did I tell you. I knew that was coming. This feral Dutchman obviously has no standards. Well.....actually I suppose he does.....living in britain among his former colonial masters.