ChavWivaLawDegree

This made me laugh! Kingston Lawyer and the Portland Police A lawyer runs a stop sign in Portland and gets pulled over by the Police. He thinks that he is smarter than the police because he is a lawyer from Kingston and is certain that he has a better education than any Jamaican Police. He decides to prove this to himself and have some fun at the Police expense. The Police says," Yuh License an yuh registration, please." "What for?" says the lawyer. The Police says, "Yuh didn't come to a complete stop at de stop sign." Then the lawyer says, "I slowed down, and no one was coming." "Yuh neva did come to a complete stop, Says the Police. License an registration, please." The lawyer says, "What's the difference?" "De difference is dat yuh hav fe come to ah complete stop - dat's de law. License an registration, please!" the Police says. Lawyer says, "If you can show me the legal difference between slow down and stop, I'll give you my license and registration; and you give me the ticket. If not, you let me go and don't give me the ticket." That sounds fair. "Get yuh rass outa de vehicle, sar", the Police says. At this point, the Police drape up de man, pull out his batton and starts beating the lawyer all over his body and asks, "Yuh waan me fe stop, or just slow down?"

Haha, she's a very nice lady I'll have you know! (Jenny Jones)

Lozzy - that's Jenny Jones you plum!

it's 50p a bag in Dulwich and it's ready bagged so not too bad. I'll leave it in the bags to sweat for a bit to make sure it's not too raw.

haha that was funny on about 3 levels there!! Unless you didn't intend it to be layer of horse manure, then it's only 2.

There is a Green candidate you know. She is actually quite good, despite being blonde. http://sianformayor.org.uk/

A) Four jobs I have had in my life:** Kitchen porter, supermarket cashier, aerobics instructor, hot shot lawyer! Four movies I would watch over and over:** None C) Four places I have lived:** Birkenhead, Forest in Canada, Elephant & Castle, East Dulwich D) Four television shows I watch:** News at 10, Newsnight, Eastenders, It's not easy being green E ) Last Four places I have been on holiday:** Cornwall, Spain, France, Rotterdam Websites I visit daily:** EDF, Facebook, Yahoo mail, IND site G) Four of my favourite foods:** Peanut butter on Toast, fruit, tuna and rice, cabbage H) Four places I would rather be right now:** On my own farm, somewhere hot, in my bed, under LL Cool J!

I've also dug up my front lawn into 4 veg beds to the amusement of my neighbours and am hoping to get some horse manure to go with it tomorrow. Gona do the same in the back garden after I've fenced off the end half. You know my neighbours love me!! Hehe

I've arranged to pick up my chickens on Sunday and I'm so excited. I'm not sure if I'll get 3 or 4, I'll ask the farmer how big they get. I've gone for the White Leghorn because they are ready now and they are good layers. This is what they look like apparently http://lalithfarms.com/images/whiteleghorn.jpg But I'll post pics of mine when I get them.

It's a hatchet job

Give us a swig

I'm not even going to comment on the money drain on everyone at every level in every country of the world, that all heads up towards the bastards at the top, where they all sit on their fat greedy arses, getting richer and richer while laughing their tits off and watching the plebs tear each other appart over the remaining dwindling resources.

I'm looking forward to it, and I can actually get drunk cos the seminar in work is the weekend after, not this weekend. Hurrah

RosieH - I agree

They have a very loud voice in the Plough if I remember correctly. Oops sorry, those badly behaved kids with no boundaries were the offspring of older parents.

Gerry - still no facts to back up your assertions then?

And 40+ tired and cranky mother's don't feel resentful for the curtailing of their freedom?

I'm about to start my deep breathing exercises and then get on with some work!!

Gerry, on what facts do you base your assertions? My daughter has a lot of friends who are her ages with kids, and they all have support from their extended family. I think this is just a pile of crap that is rolled out by middleclass busybodies to endorse their selfish lifestyle choices and late parenting that is added on like another purchase after they already have the matching towels, bed linen and Aga.

I just hate the asumption that teenagers doing what nature intended and procreating is always seen as something negative to be pitied and looked down on.

"it's common sense that if you have some life experience behind you" Isn't that what grandparents and other family are there for?

Exactly, how good is that for the development of the child?

So it is better to wait until you are in your 40's with a pile of money and dried up ovaries is it?

Mockney - Quote from nicked from Amnesty, but I studied the Universal Declaration in Uni and it is now considered to be universally applicaple as Customary International Law. "Everyone, everywhere has the right to live with dignity. The means that no one should be denied their rights to education, adequate housing, food, water and sanitation, the highest attainable standard of health, and other economic, social and cultural rights. Since the adoption of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights in 1948, the international community has recognized that all human rights are indivisible." So yes having access to a home is a human right.

Whatever!