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Hi Molly I was trying to come up with a bit of a solution to your shoe problem. I'm wondering if you could find some regular shoes that are a bit on the clunky side, but not as annoying as the corrective ones? We recently bought a pair of very heavy soled, high topped sneakers at the Gap for instance. Maybe make them "special playground " shoes or something like that, and let her wear those a bit to get used to the weight and learn to balance in them? I can only imagine the frustration of loving the freedom of barefoot toddler running to being locked into clunkers! Also it might help her to gradually get her balance, which is a big part of the problem at 13 months I suspect. I don't think that spending a few weeks slowly getting her used to increasingly bulky footwear will be time lost, so I wouldn't worry too much there. Poor babies! It reminds me of a friend with a baby boy who needed a corrective helmet. As you can imagine, he hated it, and when she would put him in his cot at night his form of protest was to run his helmet head back and forth across the cot rails. Clunk clunk clunk! Somehow they all get through it, tough little critters. :)

Hi Millsa What you describe is exactly what I had done, the tiny little casts, the boots with the bar etc. (my parents still have them..... the casts are so tiny!) but aside from pictures of me as an infant with them I have absolutely no memory of it and have had no problems since. So sit back and feel good about it all because he will be fine now and will never know the difference. It must be traumatic as a parent, but I just wanted you to know that. What my son has is not anywhere near as extreme, but of course it has made me worry a bit anyway. I think it depends on where the bend is. Mine and likely your son's was at the ankle, hence the more dramatic approach. My son's is more at the toe, so it's more a matter of straightening out the shape of the foot. Molly, I certainly wasn't suggesting you abandon the shoes. But I thought I would reassure you that with such a slight bend (and can I be presumptuous and assume it's more at the toe like my son's?) I think that if you keep her in the shoes as much as you can it should be okay. She hasn't been in shoes much yet at this age, but once she is wearing them more often it should turn the toes slightly over time. I have often wondered if we should have had the shoes, but see that between one and three he really seems to have corrected quite a bit with just normal shoes. I would imagine that a few more years will really set it. I have to admit that I always thought his little chimp feet were delicious!

My son has the same thing. When he was a year old we were advised to watch and wait to see how he walked. Apparently it is common for children to outgrow it by around five (after several years of shoe wearing and frequent walking). He is now three and it seems to be somewhat better.......we still notice sometimes, especially when he's tired. But he's very agile and athletic and not at all clumsy, which is what the doctors said to look for. We didn't do the special shoes, although I did ask about them. We will be meeting with a podiatrist soon to discuss future plans but honestly feel that they are almost "normal". Of course as a parent my only concern is to avoid leaving him with anything that could leave him vulnerable to cruel children, as mentioned earlier. If it makes you feel any better, I had a severe case as a baby and had the surgical correction. It was sorted long before I was walking so have no memory of it, but have never had any issues at all and was never called "spaz" at school! :)

I write "not at this address" on it and re-post so it goes back to the sender. I would rather have a company think I moved and couldn't be located than think I was just ignoring their "third and final" letter. What I can't understand is why I pay to have my post forwarded due to change of address, only to have it show up about half the time? Why offer a service if you can't provide it properly? Silly buggers

I think it depends on your pregnancy as well. I just remember being so hungry all the time that I had this gnawing ache constantly, sooooo I ate......and ate......and ate ........ I woke up so hungry in the morning that I had to have my "first" breakfast (something fast!) to hold myself until I could get my "second" breakfast. I know, it sounds absolutely bizarre. But the minute my son was born the gnawing hunger just disappeared. I think his size and rapid growth required extra energy? He had a growth spurt around the 28 week mark, which pushed his size off the charts. It didn't take long for my joints to ache and sciatic to kick in, which meant I lost a lot of mobility. It's easy math really, if you suddenly double your caloric intake and then cease all physical activity, you will gain wait, lots of it, fast. If you eat well and keep physical, you won't. Sounds so easy but then I'm never one to do things the easy way if there is a much harder way to do it! I really wouldn't worry too much, things happen how they happen and we just learn to muddle through with our lot. So now I have a big fat squishy muffin top(s?)..... no worries.

As a teacher I never had any problem with it, in fact I looked at it as a wonderful learning experience. If the parents had the notion to discuss it with me I always suggested they make the trip into a school project, collecting postcards, maps etc. and creating a scrapbook. If they were up for it I also encouraged the the child to tell the class about their adventure. I ended up with some of the most fantastic projects from students this way, and they had a meaningful memento from their trip. Not sure how the absentee system works here though, sorry!

We have always found that getting the bathroom good and steamy and then putting a few drops of Olbas oil in the water for their bedtime bath is helpful. At the end of the bath we then used the "snot sucker"...... which I believe is called a nasal aspirator. If you can find a hot steam vapourizer (hard to find in this country) they are incredibly effective as well, but must be placed safely where baby can't reach it to avoid steam burns. They often come with a receptacle for Vicks vapour rub, but otherwise Vicks is a must however you can fit it into the equation. I think the crushed lemon thyme on a muslin on the radiator sounds brilliant. Must try that one!

Controlled crying never even came up. I didn't do it and I'm not suggesting snowboarder do it either. I can't understand how parenting has become so categorized...... controlled crying, baby led weaning, attachment parenting etc etc etc. Common sense tells me "baby led" means just that, and her baby is leading her towards purees. Can't see a philosophical debate coming out of that, it is what it is.

I wouldn't worry too much about sticking to rules, besides your baby is "leading" you towards purees. If that is what makes him happy, it's really not a bad thing. I actually really enjoyed that time! Anyway yeah the comments from people are almost as bad as the sleep deprivation. My mother, who makes coffee nervous, was constantly telling me that "so and so's daughter is a nurse and she says that something's not right". Then I would meet up with moms and babies and NONE of them were having sleep issues. And I would be green with exhaustion, jealous that they were getting sleep but also that they were enjoying babyhood so much more because of it. That said, solids didn't work on my little night owl. As it turns out, my son is very strong willed and from a very early age realized that if he called I would come and snuggle and it became a habit, one that would surely kill me if it kept up. By nine months I was ready to be committed and had to really get real about getting him to sleep at night. It was a LOT of work and took a couple of months (with very few tears I should add) but I turned him into an awesome sleeper. Regarding statements that trying to get some sleep is "refusing night parenting" .......is that supposed to be a joke? I have never heard anything so counter-productive and harsh in three years of mothering. When you are trembling, with a knotted and nauseous stomach and headache 24 hours a day because you are getting so little sleep that you actually feel like you might drop dead of a heart attack any second now, you can make comments about what motivates someone to get the situation on track. What an insensitive comment. Snowboarder is looking for help. I'm glad that things are going a bit better for you but honestly??????

Sorry yeah you're right, it does read that way. Wasn't meant to. First and foremost I support a woman's right to decide what is right for her.

So essentially the same issue...... access to proper modern medical care (even if that just means clean water or antibiotics). What they didn't mention in that piece is the growing number of tiny (1 lb.! wow) babies that are being born in the US as well as multiples born as a result of IVF (quads and quints are much less rare these days). These babies are included in these statistics but would never have even made it into the statistics for live births in some countries because they may not have the expertise to get them that far. It is absolutely staggering to me that there are babies born at 22 weeks who are born alive and saved. But even if they can't do anything more for that baby they are counted in the live birth statistics (which we all know can be manipulated to explain anything we want them to, the truth lies in the variables they leave out). I am certain that there are very few of these babies in the Nigerian statistics. So we are just comparing apples pianos. I have visited plenty of poor areas in the US and lived in poor parts of London and have trouble believing that Americans are having more issues with clean water and hygiene than urban Brits..... it can be pretty shocking here. What is different is that the US is massive and there are many rural pockets that are literally days away from the next decent sized centre. Access to everything is difficult. The Appalachians are a good example, although ironically I believe that is where Ina May is based, but then maybe that grew as a necessity out of lack of access to medical centres? Very complex but incredibly interesting I think.

linzkg you are right about women giving birth in bushes, in many places they still do. But I rarely hear anyone mention that some of these places have incredibly high infant and/or mother mortality rates (for a variety of reasons of course). I have a feeling that the women who have no option but to go alone into a bush would have trouble understanding a culture that has the luxury of ignoring the preventative measures modern medicine provides for us. Or our access to knowledge. When I was pregnant I saw the movie The Constant Gardener. The main character is an aid worker in Africa and decides to give birth in the African hut hospital instead of a modern English hospital because she doesn't want to have special treatment above that of the women she is working with. Her baby dies in childbirth. And all I could think was how insulting it was to the other women in that hut who would have done anything to have the option she had access to. In a funny way it formed a lot of my attitudes towards the politics of birth. Sadly, there will always be a terrible outcome for someone until mortality rates are zero, which is not possible. But they are very low. I think home births are wonderful and fantastic, hard not to, and I read Ina May like everyone else. But after my doctors said I should have a c-section it took me about three seconds to decide to put my faith in them and accept that as my new plan. I'm certainly not suggesting that everyone should jump on the medical intervention bandwagon, far from it, but I also sometimes felt (and still do) that birth has become a competitive sport and the challenge is to prove how tough you can be (85 hours! no drugs! baby came out sideways! on the roof of our house! top that!) linzkg I am so happy your little guy is well, what an incredible story. I hope you get the answers you are looking for.

Molly I really feel that annaj was completely reasonable and on topic........ until it was made personal. It's a bit much to blame the discussion on "confusion" and certainly too much to blame it on not being face to face and relying on words only to communicate. One person shared their opinion and experience, another shared their own in response. Part of participating on this forum is the understanding that everybody isn't going to love everything you say all the time. Several people are cursing me as they read this! :) Otherwise I find the discussion to be interesting. And I think that there is some truth to what annaj is saying: I am curious about the anti-medical establishment tone that pops up on here as well. I am interested in the response from the medical community and I often feel that it is not welcome. And there is room on this forum for all sides to discuss. And no I don't work in the medical community either.

Sorry sillywomen, but I think it was you who took the discussion in that direction. I thought the previous posters made some interesting points, and your following post was the aggressively defensive one. Didn't quite understand the apology but oh well. Just wondering, what does "the American childbirth model" mean? I hear a version of "American style" used quite often in this country, often to describe something unpalatable. I'm always confused by it. Particularly since Ina May' farm (American) is used as the example for gold standard natural birth here. Hmmmmm. How would you describe the "British childbirth model"? And no I'm not American.

I could not have lived without our playpen for that exact reason. I found it handy about a hundred times a day, like when you need a trip to the toilet, answer the door, check the mail, cook in the kitchen without a little one underfoot. I would have never showered either. If it was too much like a prison my very vocal son would have let me know, just throw a few toys and books in in and (shame!) put it in front of the t.v. and presto! A nice peaceful shower. Sometimes you just have to do what you have to do. Plus..... we have travelled a lot with our son and it made life so much easier to have a portable bed. Not sure I'd splurge on anything fancy, friends gave us one that they were no longer using.

Thank goodness I'm not the only one with incredibly strange post baby body issues. I have often wondered why my pre-baby pot belly has somehow reversed itself to a muffin top? Doesn't that break some law of physics? And the redistribution of weight has had me baffled..... why do I weigh what I used to but I now look and feel a good stone or two on the squishy side? I always had a bit of a belly and frustrating inner thighs, but I NEVER had hip/butt/backfat (yes I said it, backfat grrr) issues. Now it's just layered on everywhere. And don't even get me started on my neck waddle thingy. Has anyone discovered magical clothes that hide the "spare tire"? I no longer know how to dress myself, so end up doing the baggy top thing which is so undignified. The boobs are a bit monstrous now too so baggy clothes just make me look like a blob. Sigh. Oddly, my legs seem thinner than ever.

Margate. Not nearly as cute as Whitstable or Broadstairs, but by far the best beach in the area. Loads of really really great sand and not as busy. Don't expect to fall in love with the town though.

I borrowed one from a kindly neighbor, but would buy a different one if I had to do it over again. If it is wood framed and the cushion isn't thick enough it can get pretty uncomfortable after awhile. In my case I spend hours and hours a day (every meal plus colicky evenings)and by about six months I never wanted to see it again. That said, there's nothing like the feeling of rocking a small baby in the wee hours. I really would get one. Extra cushiony.

I had a wonderful c-section. I chose a small incision across my abdomen over the "front to back down there" variety that my medical team predicted. No problems at all. No regrets. Perfect birth under the circumstances. But I have never given birth the other way so........ Helena I'm so sorry it went that way for you after everything you did to prepare, but it will get better. I find it shocking that in 2009 someone as informed as you could have such a horrible experience. What does that say about the women out there who don't have a voice or someone advocating? Truly unacceptable.

Being home won't make any difference, we were broken into in the middle of the night, and we have the whole house so they don't always target flats. A few days later the house next door was done, three flats, in daylight. Everything except the location was completely different. Change all the locks, get a London bar, and make sure the whole neighborhood sees the locksmith's van so word spreads that your house is no longer open for business. It's just a terrible feeling, I know, and the only good thing for us was that our baby son was still asleep in his room when I realized what happened and ran to find him. Once you have been violated it's very hard to swallow the old "it happens" statements.

Every time I see Kate Ford pushing her buggy down down Lordship I just want to shout "Tracy I love you!" But I'm Canadian and we don't do that. I guess Londoners don't either. Shame, really.

My son was practically square so I know what you mean. I found that the Gap and H&M often had some great ones that had wide soft elastic at the top, were quite roomy, and had elastic on the cuff so that if you did have to buy bigger sizes (we did) at least the legs were not dragging at the bottom. Especially helpful when they start cruising and walking because it's hard to learn to walk when you're dripping over you trousers!

Should mention, as I am always talking about the difficulties of my son and what a misery the first year was, my son has always had the most delicious personality and a laugh to die for. So, in spite of his "tenacity" and the fact that he has kicked my **s every day of his life, he has also been the sweetest, most wonderful little boy and gets better every day. Which is probably what kept him alive some days! The lovely part about intense babies is that they laugh and love as intensely as they cry and fuss!

Know what you mean about leaving themto cry. Like I said, I did three minutes at a time because that was all I could take. Does the book say anything about the damage done to a mother's brain from prolonged crying? :)

Dr Sears doesn't work for non-traditional babies. Nothing in his "bag of tricks" worked for us, and believe me, I studied his books like a bloody scholar before I realized that they just don't factor in personality. The message was that if you didn't breastfeed, co-sleep and "wear" your baby you would end up with a fat, dumb, sickly child and you would have no one to blame but yourself. Not exactly the encouragement a new mom needs when these things don't work (my god did my son hate the sling!) It's all good philosophy, I bought into it completely before they handed me my "one of a kind" son. Probably worth a read, but I found that the Baby Whisperer gives great advice about non-textbook babies. I know I bang on about it but she honestly saved my life. The hardest thing about having such intense babies is that so few people have them that you just can't articulate how very hard it can be. The worst advice I would get was "um, don't babies cry? Don't babies get up in the night?" Well yes, yes they do. Again, it's more about the intensity of it.