susyp

done too, going to try your curry meal on my 5 year old daughter who moans and moans at us every time we have curry! fingers crossed she'll be converted! hardly any dairy free kids meals out there - would love there to be more! (and soya and beef free!) - susypx

i would probably drop the nap altogheter and ask the nursery too - then her body clock will reset properly and she will go to bed earlier and sleep the 12 hours - without being tired and cranky in the day. i found it much better when my daughter dropped her nap when she was only just 2 - initially went to bed by 6pm but soon got used to it. she used to get the odd nap on the move as above but generally not - i did have to avoid going out from about 3pm to stop her having a late nap though! susypx oh and just to say also that i used to give her a nutriotious meal at lunch and then often just toast or cereal for dinner during the transition period as she was so exhausted by this point. She started afternoon nursery at 3 + 2 months so it ended up being good we dropped it so early and got her into a long sleep at night. have to say it was one of my highlights of toddlerhood - not having to worry about nap timings anymore!! freedom of just going out for the day!

I have to put my litter tray in the hallway overnight because she can hear other cats or foxes Overnight and can see them through the cat flap. Orherwise she goes in the bath of all Places! Susypx Oh and another vote here for feliway! During building work I could tell when it ran out as she wouldn't move from the bed. Def does something.

Oh brilliant very encouraging. Her two friends learnt Over te summer so part of her hysteria with stabilisers I think is frustration . I don't have a bike but would get one I think if she learnt . She'll be hysterical at first like she is with everything but she is learning resilience! Susypx

Yes have sourced specialist vet to see tomorrow. And given that I did not catch said cat in act precisely, and that foxes I have since read do attack tortoises- the cat will just get a pure water soaking at the least for its terrorising of my cat abd constant spraying of our doors and bin - and Toby is coming in at night from now on.

Also just to note - tortoises are not happy in a small pen - he would go nuts. He is aout 60 years old and in all that time he has been trundling around various gardens completely happily. He has a favourite bush he sleeps under which he was dug out of and attacked. We've just brought him inside for the night and he was burrowed in a completely different part of the garden to usual so is obviously traumaised. supersoakers apparenlty have a range of 10 metres so I can position one by back door and one by back bedroom window. susypx

my 5 year old has always been a bit wobbly on her stabilisers - today she fell off 3 times - i did notice when we got home that her tyres were quite flat so that may have contributed! however, given that she has never really been very confident on her stabilisers i've just taken them off her bike and lowered the seat so she can touch the ground more essily - and taken off the accompanying basket/bag etc to make the bike lighter. My thinking is that given she is quite wobbly with stabilisers we may as well go the full hog and learn to ride without them - in a big field soemwhere. I couldn't get her out again today after her falls but she has promised to try next week. I've said I'll just hold on to her and one day let go and she won't realise. Is this how you do it? Not remotely bothered about her learning to ride just yet but had enough of the stabilisers - she seems to try and fall towards the way she s falling so ends up in a heap on the floo.r I don't remember falling of with stabilisers I have to say! susypx

Yes I've been close enough on numerous occasions to see he is not neutered ! I don't think I could catch him myself he scares the life out of me he is absolutely huge! - a water pistol from several metres away is the best i can do - but i take your point about the dye - will see if water itself does the trick. It's worked for me in previous properties with unwanted cats but not sure about this monster cat! susypx

I haven't been to the neighbours as our neighbour in between us apparently went to ask them to clear their gutter as it was causing a backlog of water dripping over their property and was told to mind his own business. Not sure I can be bothered to get as wound up as I would be with that response. So I have ordered two supersoakers which I plan to fill up with water coloured with food dye - so not only will the cat get soaked hopefully their soft furnishings will equally have interesting consequences. Cat is definitely not neutered- otherwise i would be a bit more tolerant as i have always had cats and i used to have one I could never have kept in at night - but there is no excuse for not neutering a tom cat. susypx

We've lived in our house now for about 5 years - we have quite an old cat and as soon as we moved in it became apparent that a cat from 2 doors down was very aggressive and attacked her a few times. I keep her in at night now and that seems to have solved the problem mainly. It means we have to keep her in when we go on holiday as well. However, their cat is unneutered and for the last 5 years it has been spraying our front and back doors. It fights with other cats in our garden. And we have just discovered that it has attacked our tortoise very badly. We saw it near the tortoise the other night and chased it off - we had heard a large bang and a miaow. Now we have noticed that the tortoise has had half its eye gouged - and scratched all its shell and tail area. Terrible smell so it's clearly infected. I'm going to go and see the neighbours later on to ask them to keep it in at night now but I very much doubt they will - after all they haven't even had it neutered. what else can i do? susypx

all brilliant encouragement here! i am going to avoid the tv from now on as it seems a common problem - and get up earlier! with the name calling - after watching that 3 day nanny i explained to the little angel that my approach from now on to shouting or being rude was that she would get one warning then be in her room. Since then she has had 2 warnings and no goingto her room and today no warnings at all - she's been perfect yes i think a lot of it is tiredness but she is totally into her sport clubs and she does art o nthe third day which she pretty much does all the time at home anyway. I don't want to take away an activity she loves but I have stopped her doing any more ! She had an inset day yesterday and we went swimming and bowling and had a lovely day with no shouting by either of us! I suspect she is a bit too like me for us to avoid any shouting. I asked my mum today how she got 3 of us out the house and she said basically me and my brother were fine but my sister was away with the fairies and she couldn't inject urgency into her so often got cross - it's obviously in part a character type! thanks everyone! susypx

I used to babysit as a teen and got about ?10 an evening and that was about 25 years ago! I gave it up after one night when the little girl woke up crying wiht a tummy ache so bad that i had to call her parents home (wouldn't you want to be called!) they told me to keep the cat in so I did and it pooed i the kitchen - my first experience of cat poo and I couldn't believe the smell so i just shut the kitchen door and pretended i had no idea when they got home they were pissed off to be called home as they said daughter was making it up and couldn't believe the cat poo hadn't been cleaned up that was me done . - I would pay someone properly just so they take it seriously in any case - if you get proper pay then you feel like you are doing a proper job surely? love this thread susypx

how is she today WM? susypx

I agree with RenF that the list of foods she will eat isn't that short and it isn't that unusual. She will get better. My daughter would never eat school dinners - she is 5 and i consider her an ok eater but she is fussy - no potatoes or even chips- only sausages cooked without any burnt bits on (so I can't reliably order in a restaurant or expect her to eat at someone elses house) - fish fingers only in the oven again no burnt bits - but she is steadily getting better and trying more things and it definitely helps if i don't stress about it. My one will always eat pasta in tomato sauce but in most places that is all she would eat as she doesn't eat chips which most kids meals involve! But her two best friends won't touch anything with sauce on (and for one of them that includes pizza). The only thing all 3 of them will eat is fish fingers and plain pasta and even then they all eat different vegs ! good luck! susypx

yes mellors you are right about the name calling - i need t ostart putting her in her room for each and every episode. I think if I just get up earlier I will be calmer and everything will happen that much earlier . I think I will ask her to draw pictures etc after breakfast (which she is likely to agree too) and then teeth before telly and see how it all works. tomorrow is an inset day so i think i may take her to a big pool near me which has slides and ten pin bowling etc and just have a realy fun day together (hopefully) with no timetable to it. i think she does kick off more with me partly because I am her mum. As for eg even on the days i work she won't tell her dad about things that have upset her at school but saves it al for me when i get home. So i tend to get all the emotions. But doesn't mean she can be rude. susypx

thank you amazingly top tips there! most of it I do have sorted it's just the last 15 mins - as she has breakfast then i try and leave it 30 mins after having her oj before cleaning her teeth and having a wee - by which point she is settled watching tv so won't shift! it could be that she has breakfast half an hour earlier (altho then i worry she will get hungry at school ) and then gets dressed etc which would mean i could clean her teeth etc before telly - so she is completely ready before we put the telly on. what is quite annoying is that she always says "daddy doesn't do it like that". arg. yes she is exhausted by thurs/friday but she loves her swimming and tennis so i am loathe to take it away from her. it's the rudeness that is really getting to me as well. I can't believe the name calling. I am going to start putting her in her room each time she does it but that will just escalate screaming matches as she goes beserk - but i think i need to start setting some behaviour standards. susypx

i think i might just get up at 6 (same as work days) so that I can have a cup of tea in peace and sort everything out including myself then all i have t do is get her washed fed and dressed - might be easier! just had huge row with my otherhalf about this as I feel that I am just getting the hard end of the week . He is freelance and not been working much so at home most of the time. At the moment he takes her swimming lessons on a monday and tennis on a tuesday. I set both classes up and I am very into swimming myself so was keen to take her to her swimming lessons - in the end the class was on a day i worked so i suggested he take her. But now I am thinking of maybe working tues-thurs so that I have a least one day with her when we are both rested and happy (hopefully) after the weekend plus I would like to see her learning to swim. He thinks I am being completely unreasonable as it is "his thing". Basically we are fighting over our child. But I just feel I am getting all of the tantrums and not a lot of the good stuff susypx

If you look at the turn2u website you can find out what benefits you are entitled to to help you - I think single parents get something like 70% of childcare costs paid so that makes it a lot more practical to work. susypx

So, I work mon-weds (when my husband does childcare) and then I am off thursday and friday . Thursdays in particular my daughter and I ALWAYS have a screaming row just before she goes to school as for the life of me i can't get her ready in time as she just won't cooperate. She is rude and calls me names like "poo poo mummy" . I can't stand it and I am thinking of shifting my work days so i work the end of the week rather than the beginning as i think part of it must be that we are both tired and she does clubs the first 3 days of the week after school. It leaves me feeling down all day when I'v eleft her after a shouting match. Back to the days of 2 year old tantrums and feeling like a terrible parent as my only solution is to shout at her. I was off yesterday for a hospital appt and as I had to leave earlier and drop her at a friend's house I got up really early and made her lunch etc before she even got up - this could be a solution so that all I have t odo is get her ready for school rather than make her lunch/get myself ready- but it seems a bit extreme getting up at 6am when we have to leave at 0845! SAhe's grumpy after school and hubbie and I had a row about the fact I've said I would liek to take her to one of her activities earlier in the week as all i get later in the week is grumpy child at home. So I've now said well lets just both take her (ridiculous but what can you do). All the shouting at eachother and her calling me (silly) names all the time is just getting a bit out of control and I feel I'm in one of those can't win situations - I need some advice on how to calm the situation down and not always resort to shouting. I think we need to punish her more ie if she can't behave on a thursday she needs to miss all her clubs the next week - my husband thinks that is too extreme (as he likes taking her to these things!) but I think she needs some consequences and she really can't carry on being so rude and shouting at me for eg when I ask her to switch of the tv as she needs to clean her teeth and put her shoes on. I do start off being calm but it just makes me so cross when she shouts "NOO POOPOO MUMMY" . losing the parenting game at the moment - help! susypx

my daughter did this once when she had a really bad cold and was pretty ill and i just assumed it was mucous . But she only did it once and she was really quite ill. Was quite shocking but that seemed to be the peak of the illness- but she definitely had a cold I would probably go to a&e just be sure. I think if temp stays high for more than 3 days it is definitely worth getting her checked out. Hopeflly won't be too much of a wait as she is so young. susypx

yes i 've been watching - actually really sensible advice and pretty normal kids! susypx

Fay Ripley's first cookbook - changed my life - food all the family and a very fussy 18 month old (at the time) would eat. Sausage casserole is divine. Before that she hadn't really come off purees. basically it taught me how to cook!! Each fo the receipies are baby friendly - she tells you how to adapt for babies . My daughter is dairy free too and this has quite a lot in that work ok. also look out slow cooker receipies - good for children as they make the meat very tender. susypx

my daughter is in year 1 now and probably for the first half term at least in reception i got nothing - then i got more ...by the summer term was getting a full run down. I think they are quite overwhelmed when they start. It did make me chuckle the other day as i passed at least 3 reception parents saying variants of "so you can't remember ANYTHING' to their children- but i have to say i am not getting a lot yet about year 1 either for same reason - it's much stricter and they all seem a little shell shocked ! also what you get is not always that reliable - helps to compare notes with other parents! just edited t osay the lunch thing was a problem for us and others - she has packed lunch too - she eats very slowly and hated being left in the hall so often would return wit ha full lunch box- again i think it's the overwhelmed thing. now she is quite proud she is the last infant in the hall and greets the juniors coming in cheerily! susypx

My daughter (5) has an inset day coming up- she has asked to go to a museum, we ve been to nat hist and science recently - where else would be good to visit? V&a? Thanks Susypx

wow abercrombie and fitch - i used to be obsessed with that place ! still on trend then! the shops seem considerably darker than they used to be when i was a youngster though ! susypx