Michael Palaeologus

"Give the youth of today a bar of soap and they'd likely as not eat it" More likely snort it or inject it. Bloody tear-aways. Is it time for my nap yet? Oh lawks there is an RAF flypast on the telly soon, must stay awake for that. The only thing that is worth watching nowadays, that and the Antiques Roadshow, even that has gone down the hill since Hugh Skully left.

"David" - *Stern look* "Bowl of water, bar of coaltar soap. You know what to do"

Bless! What are the slugs etc like in Singers? Huge and voracious buggers probably. Another French bean has popped up and 2 more courgettes - I buried the latter too deeply and had to go excavating to bring them nearer to the surface. I am becoming my Dad. Should we think about a cooperative EDF allotment? or does somebody have an unused back garden that they would be willing to share?

Eh? What? Speak up! Stop muttering!

"Peas go mental don't they?" - What kind of Huguenot post is that? In the old days this would have been a 1500 word thesis on the pea genus and its fecundity with photos, diagrams and supporting statistics. Are you feeling pea-ky?

I was up and about at 4am today. Didnt see any youngster about at all. Shocking.

Did I mention National Service?

National Service. Then the youngsters can use up their excess energy in Afghanistan and Iraq. Didnt do my generation any harm, well, those of them that came back that is.

National Service. Then the youngsters can use up their excess energy in Afghanistan and Iraq. Didnt do my generation any harm, well, those of them came back that is.

My toms are looking lovely and the runner beans have gone mad, flowers and growth everywhere. The late planted broad beans are doing well and the very late planted french climbing beans have just appeared. The courgettes and mini-squashes are a disappointment, only 2 have appeared. Not bad for small, first floor balcony. How are we all doing?

Jerry! Jerry! Where?! I'll get the blighter! Where's my Lewis gun? Must be with the teeth. I was in the war you know. Mass slaughter, starvation and global cataclysm. The good old days.

I would join in this discussion, but I am looking for my teeth, I think they dropped out of the glass and are under the bed. Does anybody remember Muffin the Mule? Of course its illegal now.

Careful with that Pinot. Georgia doenst visit us very of often, but when she does there MUST be Pinot Grigio.

Its not the description that is the issue as such, the issue is that the fact that the bloke is Asian is completely irrelevant that to the fact that he is a pushy door-knocker. If you had described him a "some pushy door knocker" then fine. If you has then gone on to describe him for the benefit of other potential victims "asian bloke, 5 foot 10, moustache" then fine. However the fact that he is asian does not make him an annoying pushy door-knocker.

They are however, not the ones that I want.

I believe it was a Titistrelle Bat.

There is a certain synergy, what with PGC's mythological child-slaying and James' child-siring via assorted au-pairs, how terribly pleasant. Whisky? Yuk! Still it is good to see so many of the ladies-that-liquid-lunch in one place and vertical at the same time.

"Well helloooooo lovely Au Pair, ding dong; and your name is?" "Has James got this one in the family way yet?"

Bonekickers .... Oh poor Adrian.

I agree with him! Just look at all the complaints that we have on the Forum that are caused by an excess of trees: Lost Cats - with no trees you could actually see the little blighters Stabbings - the potential murderers hide behind the trees, thus the trees are themselves culpable in these assaults and deserve the chop Lost tortoises - see Lost Cats Loud Birds - no trees, no nests, no birds, no noise No social life - meet new friends chopping down trees Falling property prices - prices have dropped since more trees have been planted, clearly there is a causal link between these two phenomena - down with trees, up with the prices UFOs - Aliens hide in the trees and spy on us Too much light from street lights - fewer trees means that more moonlight would penetrate to street level and so we would need fewer street lights Oil prices - burn trees for fuel, if the Victorians could do it, so can we Global warming - fewer trees means less woodage acting as a thermal blanket and so the Globe would cool down Housing shortages for key workers - chop the trees down and build wooden houses on the municipal Parks for the key workers Local pubs closing - fewer trees (and the resulting key worker new housing) means fewer parks to go for walks in and so more time to spend in pubs Over-pressed NHS - fewer trees, fewer falling branches, fewer visits to A&E Peckham - the key worker's new housing on Goose Gree and the Rye would act as a barrier to the Peckhamites Public transport - erm ....DO I HAVE TO THINK OF EVERYTHING!

Nice one !

Clearly was Sean was merely demonstrating the correct technique for the tuning of a wireless

"I feel that I am being objectified" *Goes back to polishing oddly shaped balls*

"Of the newer inclination" "Alternatively experienced" "Newer than average" "Shiny"

They are free house slaves who can be made to do their parents bidding.