Pugwash

Hi James, I was approached by one of our local residents requesting that the council give some consideration to install a zebra crossing in Barry Road to enable Church attendees at St. Clements to cross safely (by Graham Court). I mentioned the Goodrich crossing and the Underhill lights but was informed that many attendees come by car and have mobility problems and the crossings are too far away to walk to. I felt that this may not be practical but promised I would contact you anyway.

St. Christopher's LL have had many paid managers over the past couple of years and some crackpot ideas have taken place. I had some clothes which were too small for me and good quality but I was informed that they would not take anything over a size 18. Being bigger than that - I have never been able to buy clothing in charity shops although the size 10 and 16 's in my family get many bargains. I have not been in the St. C's shop in Sydenham for years - we donated a lot of curtains/sheets and clothing when we cleared out my Mum's flat to the extent they told us that they could not take any more so we ended up touring all the charity shops in Forest Hill, Sydenham and Penge. I do go to Adlife in Forest Hill but find the quality of their clothing poor and somewhat outdated (I look for bargains for my grandchildren) But their book selection is very good - not keen on their bric a brac.

As well as reporting to the Police you can contact Social Services and they can investigate under their Vulnerable Adults Policy. The new Care Act places a duty on local authorities to investigate concerns raised even if the abused person is not receiving services fro social services.

From what I can gather from a volunteer at St. Christopher's is that when people donate, they are asked whether they wish the charity to claim gift aid . The forms are kept at the till and until recently only having one till and limited space for people filling in the forms, meant that frequently people purchasing would get impatient having to wait whilst the Gift Aid form was being processed by the donator and volunteer, that they would just dump their stuff and walk away - thus losing the charity many sales. With the reorganisation of the shop, 2 computerised tills have been installed, one will be used for general sales and the other for purchasers with a Gift Aid card as this has to be processed in a different way and takes longer to ring up. I have seen 'designer' or well known labels priced higher due to their good condition and did hear of a ?20 dress being sold and when the purchaser looked the designer up on the computer, found that the dress was selling for over ?100 retail, so they got a very good bargain. As St. Christopher's has many shops in SE London and Kent, stock not selling well, or too much stock is transferred to other branches. Bags which are left outside the shops are frequently torn open and scattered across the pavements and can be torn and/or get dirty ( or simply peed upon by dogs and humans) so have to be binned. Members of my family over the years have been volunteers in charity shops and have always been told that they have to pay for any goods they want in the shops so that the charity does not lose out. I have also overheard people trying to haggle a lower price for items in St. Christopher's - wanting something priced as ?1 for 10p!.

I would have asked the management if you could have another table away from the old folk. I can understand if your son was having a real strop ( having an 18 month old grandson it can be very embarrassing in public) But why should these old fogeys dictate . I suppose if you have young teenagers who like to laugh and chat - they would have also been in the firing line! Its people like those who give a bad name to all us retired people.

Once again the East Dulwich Community Centre has an Open Day - visit the animals from Surrey Docks Farm from 11 am - 2 pm Free. refreshments available for sale

My friend did speak to our 2 ward police officers yesterday whilst they were holding their weekly surgery at Christ Church so hopefully they can be on the lookout.

if the part time girl washes I give her a ?1, the cutter ?2 but if I have lowlights (?35-?40) I give the hairdresser (the owner) ?5 - I usually get a mug of tea or coffee whilst I am there.

Can the GP recommend /or refer to a dietician?. My grand daughter suffered repeated bouts of tonsillitis from around 2 years old and was very underweight. She had her tonsils removed when she was 4 and became a hearty eater and put on weight.

An elderly couple I know were visited by a man who claimed to live/work in a house backing onto their garden who felt he may have dug into one of their pipes/electric cables. and asked them to check whether their electricity was working - he followed the woman into the house before she could shut the door on him. He heard a male voice (husband) and quickly went out- the woman went to shut the main door and found another man outside who offered to clear her garden, this was refused by the woman. This was last week and my friend was aware that this was a scam. Today I found that another male turned up and said he was going to chop down the tree in front of the house as he had been informed that the couple wanted this done (they did). The tall shrub was cut down but the couple were charged ?380 in cash. My friends felt it was a bit steep but had got the job done. We all advised her to report this to our ward police officers which she did. The job took less than an hour (the shrub was rotting so the roots came out quickly) and should not have cost more that ?80. Unfortunately, this couple have been the victims of previous scams over the past 10 years and it is clear that a gang is operating in the area. The chap cutting the shrub was different to the previous 2 last week. The lady in question is hard of hearing and her husband has severe health problems. Please warn all vulnerable and/or elderly friends and neighbour about this local scam.

We used Martin some time ago to take photos of one of our grandsons - very professional and gave us a disc to choose which photos we wanted to have copied.

Another good point is to always know her friends or crowd she associates with as this will give you a good idea of they type of kids she hangs around with. When our 2 were teenagers, we encouraged them to bring home their friends for music sessions in the bedroom, girlie sleep overs, etc. Our freezer was always full of burgers and pizzas - at one stage we had around 6 teenagers popping in to 'hang out' We got to know which mate was likely to want to get drunk and those who were more responsible. My stepdaughter on the other hand - (her mother did not encourage friends in the house) consequently got involved with dubious types who encouraged petty crime and drugs. It took early motherhood for her to see sense.

Rumour has it that Plough Homecraft were reallocating to the old butchers.

James - Chris and I send you and the family our condolences - you know where we are if you want a chat.

James not only has a full time job, he is also a father and probably having a quiet time with his children before they return to school next week.

Our kids were allowed wine (greatly diluted with lemonade) from around 13 years and only at our home. Shandy was permitted again 90% lemonade from around 15. My eldest daughter (44) still horrifies pub landlords when she orders a Guiness shandy - her favourite teenage drink. I too am horrified at the number of young teenagers I see worse for drink - doing shots, spirits etc but am also aware that if parents are too strict re alcohol there is a back lash and can result in secret drinking. If you prohibit things - it makes it more of a challenge. Better to have sensible rules and discussions about dangers of drink/drug/unprotected sex, and also rules about socialising and what time expected home. My eldest now has teenagers and has confessed that although she rebelled against boundaries that we set, she now recognises that these were necessary for her own protection and to promote maturity and good morals. Her own children have to conform within her boundaries.

East Dulwich Community Centre has an outdoor playground - check out their website for pictures and details

Charity shops are inundated with soft toys. Hospitals will only take those which can be washed in machine due to infection control. A refugee or asylum centre would be best.

One of the Homeless Charities - I cannot remember which one had outreach workers who will 'visit' the homeless person to see if they wish help. They also keep a data base of the people they approach. I had to deal with an elderly homeless man who was very unwell and he was placed temporarily in a care home whilst he recovered and I got to know this charity quite well whilst I was dealing with him. It was several years ago and in the winter. I do not think it was St Mungo's.

As previous posts have commented - this lady is likely to value her independence and may not take too kindly about others trying 'to help'. Strike up a conversation by all means - I assume she recognises you as neighbours and offer to get the odd bit of shopping if the weather is too bad. You can offer your telephone number, should she need assistance. You mention that she has difficulties in getting into her house and using stairs. An assessment by an OT (Occupational Therapist) could result in stair rails/grab rails and other aids - you could ask her whether she would like you to make contact with OT.

May be a bit young but could try her getting used to sitting on potty but do not expect results. I have not heard of any child being trained before 18 - 24 months.

Take note from Prince Harry's recent disclosure as to how he felt following his mother's death. It is important that you talk, ideally, face to face with someone about your grief. Having lost both parents - one to cancer and one to dementia and chest infection, it is hard to accept that you will not see them again. Within 3 months my husband lost a cousin, an aunt and a father - he ended up depressed and unable to function normally. Fortunately his GP recognising his grief sought help for him and he was seen by a professional in the Community Mental Health Services for a few months. He was then mentally stronger to deal with the subsequent death of his mother and uncle, as well as my parents. Various people have offered advice and organisations to help you - you just need to be brave enough to make the next step.

As Bic said = motor bikes and scooters for many years