legalbeagle

Satre has never got me any action at all! Gabriel Garcia Marquez, on the other hand.......

Crowded House. I mean who else would come up with: "Hey, don't look now, but there goes God, in his sexy pants with his sausage dog, and he can't stand beelzebub, cos he looks so good in black" I rest my case.

Hope you are ok chinny, that's horrible. Sounds like you weren't hurt which is a relief, but take it easy for the weekend, you might be a bit shocked.

????? tell me more! Why do tatoos look bad on birds? (Really. Genuine question. I don't have one in case you were wondering). Is there literally not one picture of any size in any place that would look ok?

Totally misread the title of this thread as "where to buy man teats in ED". Not sure what I was expecting to read really. Sorry. As you were.

I'll be honest, she's not been the same since. And OliviaDee, respect is due. That's quite some multi-tasking you've got going there, not to mention that you must have been breast feeding one handed at least some of the time. So either you have huge muscles or petite babies! Did you flush during the conference call? Best not to, I find. Leads to awkward questions.

Well thank you Moos! And everyone else who has shown sympathy/amusement - I feel oddly better knowing that along the length and breadth of Dulwich, previously normal, nay glamorous women, are now scrubbing human faeces off a variety of household surfaces whilst trying not to gag. That may make me odd, but what the hell. I'm the parent of a footballing turd monster. I'm beyond caring.

To be fair I'm not sure he actually poo'd on the dog. I think it's more likely he sort of wiped his bum on her as she was passing. She's a very small Cavalier King Charles Spaniel so she's sort of sh*tty bottom height I suppose.

Dulwichmum you raise a very good question. GOD knows where the staff were during "turdgate" but they're in for a good hiding when I find them. One thing I do know is that they weren't on the trampoline with my older child; she was standing next to the offending shite monster uttering the immortal words: "Mummy mummy, Harry's poo'd on the dog." Which in my panic I dismissed as factually inaccurate, until about an hour later, when the dog came to sit on my lap.

So I have just found out that my son can take his nappy off on his own. I know this because I just walked into our sitting room to find a huge turd on the floor, next to the grinning pantless boy. And before I could stop him, he kicked it across the room. I have just finished clearing up the flying sausage, including from down his legs, under his toe nails, and the little extra nugget I found 10 minutes later under the TV table when I wondered what the dog was trying to lick. So I would just like to say to all of those parents who told me that cleaning up your own child's poo isn't that gross, cos it's your own and you love them, well..... YOU LIED!

porcelain

Keep wanting to invite myself along to this but alas also cannot do Wednesdays........

He's alarmingly quiet. Not sure I like it!

No yummy mummy, MILF, or any other kind of female category, pc or otherwise. C- Must try harder.

Ella Fitzgerald. By a country mile.

Exactly what activities were these strange people carrying out? Were they, for example, building houses out of unsuitable materials? Do tell!

SeanMacGabhann Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > I?m just going to reiterate that social decay is > largely down to known criminals not seeing their > sentence out ? for example if one has been banned > from the forum and tld not to come back, maybe > don?t come back. > > Even if you are wearing sheep?s clothing I suspect the OP is just huffing and puffing..........

I've heard it suggested that the latter is actually a cure for the former. Or is that just a myth perpetuated by desperate men?!

*Snigger*

Check out the lunacy that is now the "unchaperoned kids cycle to school" thread.

I forgot to say that I do agree with Keef - each woman is entitled to choose. I breast fed, neither of my sisters did, and I had no issue with either choice.

Keef - I found when raising both my kids, who are still very little, that there was a real pressure to breast feed, and you were made to feel guilty and under pressure to explain yourself if you decided you just didn't want to, for whatever reason. I did breast feed my children but not for as long as many people expected, and even that caused me to feel some pressure. Maybe you are finding that women in the family room who agree with you are choosing not to speak up because they feel that it isn't really a socially acceptable point of view to say that one is entitled to choose not to breast feed. Maybe that is what Helena Handbasket might be getting at? Also people who are breast feeding by definition have very young children. My experience is that mother's with kids that young still feel things very keenly, very strongly, and can be quite forceful in their views of how to raise children. I've come under (very polite) fire more than once for suggesting that controlled crying isn't always a terrible thing, for example. I may get shot down for saying this but I think it is partly to do with the fact the they are still very hormonal!

Oh randombloke you are a card. I've had one of these for simply weeks!

What's a horny pirate's worst nightmare? A sunken chest with no booty. Thank you. Here all week. Available for weddings.....

This, Sir, is not the Lounge. Pull yourself together.