nunheadmum

Molly - if you can run for 30 mins then you can definitely do BMF. I struggle to run for 5 mins and cope. It's a real range of abilities and exercises and no one bit lasts that long - so even if there's one bit you find difficult, there'll be others that will make you feel better. (And you're split into ability groups, so you don't feel like you're struggling just as much.) As someone who's never been good at PE, it's the best exercise option I've found. I know what Snowboarder means though about finding the time. I'm lucky that daddy does bed times but my 4 year old can really make me feel guilty for putting exercise over her bed-time song! I think sometimes you do need to be selfish - I reason that if I feel fitter and happier, I'll have more patience with the kids. Of course the other option I've found is regular rounds in Gambado's - I'm sure ten reps of the slide (DD won't go herself!) is equal to one BMF session!!

Hi Pickle - well done you, doing BMF and running! Making me feel guilty as I type this instead of BMF-ing (got a chesty virusy thing....any excuse!). Think I'm going to have to do some running too as BMF itself doesn't seem to be working for me - so may be up for joining you early morning. It's either that or the wine and chocolate.....hard call as to which will take more will-power!

Just having moved no2 into a bed, we've had to reinstate the stairgate. I can't remember exactly how long we kept it with no1 but essentially it was until we felt she could reliably negotiate the stairs without falling - with a bit of leeway to anticipate the fact that she might be sleepy. Ours is across the landing and keeps us gated too so it's a real nuisance - but worth it for the peace of mind.

The earlier trains at HOP are better - I recently started using HOP after using Peckham and found the trains much quieter. Can't comment on post ELL situation as I'm one of those who now use the ELL option. The ELL trains are getting busier so hopefully the LB ones are correspondingly quieter. Would your employer consider adjusting your hours to help - I do 8-4 due to kids and the commute (on my own though) is MUCH nicer.

Good point re the southern accent. Another of my worries. I do think the (my!) Scots pronunciation makes things much clearer. I'm going to have to struggle to not correct my LO when she doesn't pronounce her 'r's and all those other things. (And not to take offence when she tells me that I'm the one who's wrong....which she has already...grrrr!!!!)

Busymum - I'd check with the school re doing less than 5 days. When I asked at my local school, THEY suggested taking the 5 day nursery place and only using 2 half-days. In the end I've decided not to as it seems like a waste and I'm sure others could use the place (& other reasons too). But if the nursery is undersubscibed and you don't mind losing the grant money from your private nursery fees (which would probably go up as the school nursery takes the full grant even though you don't use all 5 days), then it may be worth asking if you're outside the ED school hot-spot area.

Thanks Mumra. Yes, it's amazing we learn it at all when you start realising how complicated it is to explain in a logical way! We've got the Jolly Phonics stuff - my LO adores the DVD, has it every day if I let her but tends to be random in the episodes. As I'm not actively trying to teach her it, I'm working on the presumption that it will all filter through and fall into place either naturally or when she is formally taught it. It tends to be the words you come across just in daily life that cause more problems. But I'm probably worrying too much about it all and the possibility of 'getting it wrong'. Like most of us, I suspect she'll work it out one way or another in the end provided she's exposed to books, talking etc.

Excellent thread! Mumra - can I ask what you're meant to do when reading and they come across words that don't follow the usual rules or use rules they haven't covered yet or are quite complex. I tend to say 'Oh this one's a bit of a funny one' and then just say it. But I'm not sure if that's the right way or not. My LO is only 4 so I'm not trying to push her at all but she does seem interested so I want to feed that but not confuse her by doing it the wrong way. If you're kids are into letters, Alphablocks on Cbeebies really seems to get my LO's attention - she's transfixed when it's on. The programmes are really short - and I think most of them are online too - but also tackle some of the more complex issues like 'e' at the end of a word in kiddie sized chunks.

Playgroup is usually Mon, Wed and Fri morning - not sure about all the other groups though.

Same here Molly - my youngest reacted last year and seems to have a constant rash from excema so playing it safe. But I know I react to some normal brands while I don't with others so I probably could find a cheaper option for her too. But can't help playing it safe when she's still little. Interesting to hear that you can get some on the NHS. May have to try that option if it's a good summer as keeping up (particularly with nursery usage) at the prime prices will bleed me dry!

You can read too much and pay too much - picked up 2 tubes of kids sun screen at Health Matters the other week and almost keeled over when I went to pay. I bought them in the end but I'm still asking myself if it really is any better than your standard ambre solaire / nivea etc. I'm trying to tell myself it is so I feel better but having survived years of the basic ones myself as a kid, I suspect it probably isn't that justified.

Thanks for the feedback. Got it just in time yesterday to convince my hubby that we should get the Minnen. Looking forward to seeing DD's face when she sees it at the weekend. Not looking forward to trying to get DD2 to stay in her 'new' big bed tho! She'll love having a bed - and the fact she can get out it, I suspect!

Don't beat yourself up - given all the things we have to get our heads around, sometimes I just want someone else to make the decision for me. Even if it's the wrong one, it's nice when someone else makes it!

Laura S - you're not alone with a 4 year old who doesn't like bouncey castles. I spent several parties this year holding my 4 year old's hands while she bounced only on the very extreme front section. We had a lovely party at the Herne this year - you get exclusive use of the Barn at the back but the climbing frame thing is a free for all. Kids loved it and parents could calm their nerves with a tipple if desired!

I thought the Ikea ones come with a mattress which extends with the bed? I got a toddler bed for no 1 but need an option for no 2 and can't fit a full single in the room they currently share but not ready to decamp them to the bigger back room just yet (as hubby works there & has other problems). I don't want to get ANOTHER toddler bed for no 2 when no 1 will grow out of hers soon so thought an extending one would buy us some time till hopefully they're both a bit bigger and can see going to the back room as escaping the parents rather than feeling like they're being banished. And by then no1 will probably want to have more say in what we get. Dreading giving no2 the freedom of a bed though.....I just know she'll give us so much more grief than no1 did!

Has anyone tried the Ikea extending beds? Are there any issues with them? We're thinking in particular of the metal one Minnen - not sure if it'll just be squeaky. It just seems a little strange to me that Ikea are the only ones to do them. If it is such a good idea, why don't others do it? We're swithering about our options so any past experience would be welcome.

If your little one is at nursery, you could try and find out how helpful they've been with other kids. Our nursery have been brilliant with potty training and more or less did it for us in 3 days with both ours - well for wees anyway. (Don't mean to sound totally lazy, leaving it to them but it's just how it went.) But I imagine some nurseries are more helpful than others depending on what resources they have available. Also echoing what some others have said - it's so much easier when they're ready. As he hasn't actually done a wee in the potty yet, maybe continue with the bathtime bit (or other times) until he's done a few and has the concept. Running around outside with no nappy is a good way to get them to realise what a wee is - even if it doesn't end up in the potty. With no1 the nursery used to put the dolly on the potty and then sneak in some water to show the dolly weeing. An older sibling or friend is also helpful for demonstrations. Most of all though is be relaxed about it. If you stress out, the little tykes are sure to work out how to wind you up!!!!

We recently had a party at the Herne - in the barn at the back - which worked well. We kept it reasonably small. Kids loved the climbing frame if the weather was good - had some games on standby if not. Kids seemed to love the balloons as much as anything - would get more next time. And the pub atmosphere helped the parents relax a little more.

I don't think many of us are medical...probably just the medical profession's nightmare patients who ask loads of questions and read loads on the internet. I was paranoid about it at the time when it affected me. Talking to those who have been through any medical issue is often really helpful I've found - provided you can differentiate what's important for you and what's not.

Interesting to hear a post from the other side. Thinking about this thread the other day, I was thinking whether Dad's would need support just as much as mums - though maybe from a different perspective. Dad's are increasingly expected to be involved these days but so much does seem to be mum focused. That said, I don't really see dads sitting round chatting over a coffee in quite the same way mums would - can imagine a pub would probably be a more natural setting, but I know I'd have been a bit peeved at my hubby heading off to the pub in the early days while I was hemmed in by breastfeeding!!

My first was breech from about 32 weeks on - wouldn't move despite everything. I looked at loads online trying to decide whether to go for a natural birth or a c-section. I was under Dr Ross at Kings. What swung it for me was when she said that once the cord is outside the mother, they have 7 minutes to get the baby out before there is potential for problems as the cord stops working. 7 minutes just didn't seem that much time to me (probably influenced too by my sister in law who's son had an unusually large head which wasn't picked up and caused her major problems). The c-section seemed to carry fewer risks for the baby - though I admit my research on that wasn't in depth. In the end we felt that we couldn't take a risk which was based on my own preference to try for a natural birth - I'd never live with myself if something had gone wrong and I'd always wonder what if....? We were also told that of the c-sections they do for breech, 1 in 15 has an obvious problem which would mean that natural labour would have ended up in a section anyway. I can't vouch for the validity of the info we were given but it's what influenced our decision. Having had my first by a lovely planned c-section and my second by an awful natural delivery, of the two, I think I would rather repeat the first. In response to Fuschia's comments above - I had a spinal so my daughter was delivered onto me and immediately breastfed, I was off painkillers by the end of the day and recovered from the section far quicker than I did from the natural delivery. Every birth can be so different depending on you, the baby, the staff you encounter - it really is hard as there is no right or wrong answer.

I read this and can't help myself thinking that it's not just the shock of the first 3 months - it's the ongoing shock of just how much having kids tests every aspect of your personality, relationships, value systems.......I could go on. But with little local support beyond my NCT group, I do remember thinking in the beginning that having someone to talk to who had been through it a bit before me would have been such a big help. My NCT group were fantastic but it was a bit like the blind leading the blind. Having someone who we knew had raised a baby or two and managed not to kill them - despite perhaps thinking that they would at the start - would have been such a help. The only reason I could think of as to why it hadn't been started before was the fact that there are such different approaches and trying to ensure that each new mum got someone who was on a similar wavelength to themselves, could be quite a bit of an organisational challenge. That said, I'd certainly be up to offering what support I could to a new mum.

My first took to the bottle fine - my second took months of trying every type of bottle under the sun, with every possible combination of who gave it to her and when etc. Some (particularly the second I think!!) are just stronger willed. Not sure I've got any answers about what to do. Possibly being consistent - pick a feed when you think they'll want it and only offer the bottle consistently for several days/weeks. I offered the bottle first consistently at all daytime feeds for probably nearer 2 months (started with nighttime ones too but gave that up after a couple of weeks). My LO consistently refused it until one day, out and about down the park in her buggy with other things to take her mind off it possibly, she just took a full 6oz. Once she'd given in, she quickly moved to only wanting the bottle (possibly with a little guidance from me as I was going back to work). I think it's a matter of will with some kids. But they seem to pick up somehow when they need to do it for their own good e.g. mum is going back to work.

I wasn't a pure Gina mum but did use her for guidance, so hopefully I'm qualified to make some comment. You say your little one is zonked out but does he still take a feed at 10pm? If he is still taking some milk, I'd try cutting down on the amount perhaps as the first step and see how he reacts. It's always hard to be sure as babies react differently. Also as he approaches weaning, he may start to pick up his appetite again so the 10pm feed may come back in again to avoid him waking in the early hours. There is a Gina Ford website which I found very useful for discussing the various tweaks on the forums with other mums. You do need to pay a subscription. But the benefit is like minded mums who are all trying the approach. I found it helpful to realise that few follow the routines to the letter and most need tweaks at one stage or another to get through - it's not quite as easy as the book makes out!!

We've been using armbands with our now 4 year old since she was about 2-ish (although we don't go as often as we should) and she seems to be getting quite confident with them - which is unlike her given her normal bent with things physical. At the same time bought one of the suits with floats in it for our second when she was about 1.5yrs and wasn't overly impressed with it - it seemed to restrict the capacity for her to move naturally. Perhaps if you think you'd leave them unattended at all, go for the jackets but if you'll be with them till they tell you otherwise, then maybe the armbands? But I'm no expert. Benefit of armbands too is that they fold smaller for packing - but need some puff to blow up.