As some commentators have suggested that you need professional help Mr P, in your task of putting together a new wardrobe that is, I am willing to put myself forward as your fashion consultant. May I suggest an outfit for Friday night? It consists of a brilliant white silk shirt and matching white cravat worn under a three piece, crimson, moleskin, plus-four suit. Your pins below the knee will be housed in black silk stockings embroidered in the Japanese style with a willow tree motif on each and coming to rest on feet resplendent in a pair of green tweed Vans (Which I may have to liberate from the possession of a certain local resident but a truly exquisite outfit sometimes means cracking a few eggs.). Your look will be finished with a gold fob-watch, chain fastened across your waistcoat, a pinkie ring on each hand, one set with a large ruby the other an emerald of equal proportions and for headwear a feathered war bonnet of the type made popular by the Plains Indians. This ensemble will say: I am a man, a man of the world, well heeled, well travelled, a sportsman but sensitive to the plight of the Native American and I also probably know karate. Call me. I charge ?1000 a day and I am available on the NHS.