Brendan

One hundred and EIGHTY!

It is quite an interesting question. Which is worse, using public money to pay for people?s mortgages ultimately enriching the banks, or making people give up their homes and rent privately thereby putting more homes on the market which will be snapped up by private landlords ultimately resulting in more property in the hands of fewer people? If I look at the face of it I have to say I have an issue with benefit money ultimately ending up in the pockets of private landlords or the banks.

Warning contains swear words:

Clowns? Don?t talk to me about clowns. You lot don?t know you?re born the sort of clowns you have these days. In my day we had proper clowns. Respectful as well. Tip their hat to you they would before slamming a pale of whitewash over your head and booting you out in front of a bus with an oversized shoe. A proper bus too. Not one of these bendy things. Don?t know you?re born being hit by one of them. Ever seen a bendy bus with an oversized shoe anyway? Ridiculous. Destroying the community it is.

No. I've been waiting for one since I was in my twenties.

I beg your pardon. You appear to be making no sense at all. Are you trying to engage me in a conversation about carpentry perhaps? It must be the hour. I find beer helps. A pint of brown beer of some description for the lady please. Hmmm, the service is a bit sparse in here today. Normally I would go and man the pumps myself but that Dermot has a mean streak as long as the shillelagh he keeps under the bar counter and he reserves them both for those who cross the ordained boundaries univited.

Seriously though, what kind of patronising, national caricature can one dress up as for St Georges day? The St Patricks day ones are all tried and tested but St George?s poses a fresh challenge.

1 ton, that?s 1000kg or 2204.6226218 in old money. A motorcar weighing any less is just be plain dangerous.* Or would that be an old money ton, in other words 2240pounds or 1016.0469088 of the ones that make sense? Did I ever tell you about the time I beat the Sultan of Brunei at scrabble? *Not to be confused with plane dangerous.

It is wonderful stuff this Guinness. Yes it may be a highly commercialised ?brand? and therefore should get nothing but scorn from an armchair anarchist like myself but there is no another stout to rival it on these or any other islands. It is even aesthetically pleasing. ?the vertical curves snaking over the straight, horizontal contrast of black and white like Ingrid Bergman?s hips in Casablanca or Jessica Alba?s in Sin City, depending on the type of establishment of course, But. Errhhm. Anyway. Did I ever tell you about the time I saved the fortunes of one of Belgravia?s more notable Perfumeries by using a pint of Guinness to lose a Rolls-Royce in a poker game?

Good point.

Well stop cocking about on the forum and get some work done then.

I'm still a maybe for this one. Need to see how my Friday pans out work wise.

Fair enough and if they keep coming the need to discuss politics will dissipate and be replaced with amicable chit chat followed by eloquent yet exaggerated tales of derring-do and inevitably slip comfortably into discordant singing and empathic promises of lifelong friendship.

Something along these lines: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RpuMAvA8M6g&feature=related (that's the undubbed version)

Pint of Guinness, shot of bourbon and an argument about politics please.

I want to be burnt on a big pyre outside somewhere. My family aren?t too keen on the idea though but when (god willing) I have kids I?m sure I will be able to guilt them into it.

Well I?m sure she won?t have trouble finding alternative employment.

Who is this Beener you speak of?

I can?t help feel guilty about all this. I used to be in the CPT at least twice a week back in the olden days. I?m just not so much of a dirty drunk anymore. I?m sorry. I?ve not been there for months now, literally. I think this is the longest single stretch of time I haven?t been in that pub since I moved to ED.

Has anyone gone to see O Peruse A Ho yet? I?ve heard they?re implausibly good.

The grumpy old men are what make it. And I don't cause that many disturbances.

How does the physics of that work exactly?

42. Why do you ask?

If the only thing that comes out of this recession is getting that awful woman off television it will all be worth it.

Xena: Worried prince Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Thats not good enough Brenda, would you jump over > a cliff just because ?? A cliff is only one fo the things I've jumped off, just because.