Brendan

We have just been talking about this at work. I have established that I am an EPE in the DRS of MPL which is part of EPI at the ICE. When I was a little boy I always wanted to be an EPE in the DRS of MPL which is part of EPI at the ICE.

"It will be 140 quid to have her sorted."

Captain Pugwash

It is the Foxton?s mother ship. They are actually an alien race slowly taking over Britain one high street at a time. Why do you think the spiky-haired fucksticks all look so similar? They have a machine that churns out human looking earth exploration ships for the aliens who are actually small worm like creatures. The aliens control these ?agents? (as they call them) from a control centre situated in the bottom. This is why when speaking to one you get the distinct impression that they are talking out of their arse. There are a few other clues. Notice how they are the only ones who can sit comfortably on the chairs in their office. They have strangely articulated backs you see. They will also only take off their jackets within the confines of their earth-base (office) or in their transport pods (mini coopers). Their jackets are a type of life jacket that helps them survive. If you run up to one when it is making its shifty-eyed way from the office to the car and rip its jacket off the following happens. The estate agent will turn red in the face, start hurling obscenities and foaming at the mouth and then stiffen, soil itself and keel over stone dead. Having been ejected out of the bottom the alien worm will then be teleported to the mother ship and sent back to Alpha Centauri without any commission. You should try it. It?s terrific fun. Some call me crazy but I am just telling it like it is folks.

Yeah I?ve got a very good way to get around that one. Don?t Listen to BBC radio!

I don?t know what Dulwichmum?s problem is. She has super-olympic heating in that 4x4 of hers.

The general consensus seems to be that dogging is the best idea. ?sorry but if I didn?t say it someone else was bound to. Bloody cold in January mind.

I wonder which is worse for the environment, the Christmas cards I have sent out this year or the carbon I have generated spending hours on this forum every day.

When I was a kid our cat actually attacked a man who was snooping around outside our house one night. I watched it from the window. I saw this strange person in our garden trying to get into the shed when our lazy couch potato of a cat dropped, screeching and spitting, off the garden wall and onto his shoulders. The guy shrieked and ran for it. The cat padded off, licked its paws a few times and went right back to doing pretty much nothing for the next 10 years.

There you go assuming that we have a left wing government.

Well instead of Christmas cards you could just send people curry. I?ll have mine at around 5pm on a Sunday afternoon please.

Where's the Latter?

Fair enough? Unless you drive a truck for a living I suppose.

I think practically speaking in the UK at the moment you are correct there. Bar perhaps increased tolerance for users.

What about the Herne?

I don?t have any particular cause Maurice. I am just someone who comes from Africa and has seen the damage goats do to the landscape. I have been to places that are lush and have every potential to be developed for agriculture and then been back 3 years later and the landscape has been completely destroyed by overgrazing goats. I?m talking large scale soil erosion, where massive rifts have been washed out of the landscape sometimes taking parts of roads and houses with them, and complete destruction of all the vegetation even the trees.

*****OFF TOPIC POINT***** - I just think that people should be aware of this before they consider buying goats for all and sundry: The use of goats as primary livestock for subsistence farmers, especially in Africa, is a contentious issue. Because of the shape of a goat?s mouth they actually completely rip grass (and other plants) out by the roots. Unlike cows and sheep that can only eat the bits sprouting up from the ground. The consequence of this is that goats actually create desert and in the long term destroy fertile land that could support communities indefinitely if used in a sustainable way. It works like this. Farmer gets goats because they are hardy and easy to keep livestock - Goats strip land of vegetation ? Next rainy season all the fertile topsoil is washed away ? next season?s crops don?t grow because the topsoil has been washed away ? Farmer moves on to next piece of land leaving behind infertile dessert. They are a short term solution that causes an even bigger long term problem.

The only way to have a crime free society and maintain our (western, democratic or what ever you want to call them) social and political ideals is to have a very low level of poverty and a relatively even distribution of wealth. This is why it works in place like Canada and New Zealand. Those countries still have the usual problems endemic to western society like drugs and binge drinking but there is very little violent crime and robbery. The alternatives are: Totalitarian, iron fisted rule to impose order (like Singapore) or massive social inequalities coupled unchecked crime and violence (like South Africa).

Oh I have no doubt about it Mockney. I am sure that the military over there who face the stark realities every day are very aware of and jaded from what they have been made to deal with. I was just pointing out the different pictures our supposedly independent and objective press can paint.

Times Leading Quote today ?I came to rid Basra of its enemies, I now hand it back to its friends? - Major-General Graham Binns, commanding officer of British Forces in southern Iraq Guardian Leading Quote today ?UK has left behind murder and chaos? - Major General Jalil Khalaf, Basra police commander So whose opinion is more important? The man on his way home (after what I am sure his press office and the state controlled media will paint as a job well done) or the man who is left behind to deal with the chaos.

If you?re worried about the wasted paper I?m sure you can get plastic ones.

Oh well? Got another Christmas party in a couple of hours time. Best get a fried breakfast in first. ?tis the season to be silly. :)-D

Did I make an arse of myself last night? (well any more than usual?) I really, really can?t remember how I got home :-$ Whose fault was the sambuca?

With a C.G.I. willy

He?s grumpy coz out of all the sexy Spice Girls he chose the minger.