Jehovah Witnesses

[edcam]

I tell them I'm a fiercely dedicated and very happy gay man(which is true)and that their "religion" is not something I want to hear any more about. That usually scares them off. They have vile beliefs about homosexuality.

[TheArtfulDogger]

Of course it does remind me of this ...https://youtu.be/MIaORknS1Dk

[lavender27]

And they've always got thin, spindly legs. Why is that?

[rendelharris]

edcam Wrote:

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> I tell them I'm a fiercely dedicated and very

> happy gay man(which is true)and that their

> "religion" is not something I want to hear any

> more about. That usually scares them off. They

> have vile beliefs about homosexuality.

A gay friend of mine used much the same line to some "born agains" who came knocking and they told him that was why Jesus had guided them to his door, to show him the error of his ways and save him from eternal damnation. His reply wouldn't get through the filters on here, I fear.

[edcam]

rendelharris Wrote:

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> edcam Wrote:

> --------------------------------------------------

> -----

> > I tell them I'm a fiercely dedicated and very

> > happy gay man(which is true)and that their

> > "religion" is not something I want to hear any

> > more about. That usually scares them off.

> They

> > have vile beliefs about homosexuality.

>

> A gay friend of mine used much the same line to

> some "born agains" who came knocking and they told

> him that was why Jesus had guided them to his

> door, to show him the error of his ways and save

> him from eternal damnation. His reply wouldn't

> get through the filters on here, I fear.

All power to your friend!

[teddyboy23]

Tell them I'm a gay vampire

[spark67]

I have an old friend who's family were JW, he was born into it. He he decided it wasn't for him when he was older, and the church forbade any of his family or friends to talk to him, they'd cross the road if they saw him in the street...He was helped by a foundation called the "witness rehabilitation program" ( or something like that ) Its been a long road for him but he has made a new life and is happy, but what s sh*tty way for an organisation to treat people, they pretty much get short shrift when they knock on my door, I told one I wasn't interested and mentioned & about my friend, and he backed away down my path like i had a grenade in my hand

With regards to "knocking a minority" , they are pretty good at that themselves. I was at Brighton pride a few years ago, and they were harassing people on the march, they also chose to have seminar there on the same day denouncing all LGBT people

Just a quick edit to say the above happened not that long ago, so when some say the church has changed I'm pretty scepticl

[uncleglen]

I don't know how they can call themselves people of faith. They are one of the most intolerant bunch of ignoramuses I have come across in the 'religious' world...although an 18 year old at a catholic school I taught in told me that not going to church is evil.....

Picketing Pride is vile- how long before they start behaving like the Westboro' Baptist Church I wonder?

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/orlando-shooting-angels-block-westboro-baptist-church-protestors-from-victims-funerals-a7090041.html

[JohnL]

uncleglen Wrote:

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> I don't know how they can call themselves people

> of faith. They are one of the most intolerant

> bunch of ignoramuses I have come across in the

> 'religious' world...although an 18 year old at a

> catholic school I taught in told me that not going

> to church is evil.....

> Picketing Pride is vile- how long before they

> start behaving like the Westboro' Baptist Church I

> wonder?

> http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/o

> rlando-shooting-angels-block-westboro-baptist-chur

> ch-protestors-from-victims-funerals-a7090041.html

Mind - that's how #BLM first became known.

http://www.latimes.com/opinion/op-ed/la-oe-kirchick-gay-pride-black-lives-matter-20160705-snap-story.html

[Jah Lush]

I've just bought a Jehovah's Witness advent calendar.

Every time you open a door someone tells you to fuck off.

[Seabag]

Jah Lush Wrote:

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> I've just bought a Jehovah's Witness advent

> calendar.

> Every time you open a door someone tells you to

> @#$%& off.

LOL

Love that Jah

[edhistory]

Witnesses do not celebrate Christmas.

They do a Memorial Service at Easter.

[rendelharris]

Still an excellent joke though.

[Sue]

Jah Lush Wrote:

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> I've just bought a Jehovah's Witness advent

> calendar.

> Every time you open a door someone tells you to

> @#$%& off.

:))

[uncleglen]

Jah Lush Wrote:

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> I've just bought a Jehovah's Witness advent

> calendar.

> Every time you open a door someone tells you to

> @#$%& off.

Hilarious JL

The JWs have their own old persons' homes so that they do not have to put up with the birthday/Xmas stuff.....

[rendelharris]

Oddly they don't vote either, as apparently only God, not man, can decide who leads us - I remember when Obama was first elected Serena Williams saying she was so thrilled to have a black president but she hadn't voted for him as it wasn't permitted.

Not sure what they think of God's choice for the next four years...

[HonaloochieB]

I just start singing 'All Along The Watchtower', my first rendition is the Dylan one and the second is the Hendrix version.

I throw a little quiz out and ask them which is which.

Rarely can they tell, but little do they know I can't myself. Snicker.

I offer a straight 'heads or tails' bet for a fiver, but rarely get taken up on it.

When I say that I actually do this, I never actually have, so take it as a possible response on my part.

Though it seems such an exhaustingly unlikely process that I almost certainly won't do it.

I'll just carry on with the usual banal "Not for me" (when I bother to answer my door, I'm with Larry David about the 'pop-in) to the invariably polite (if deluded) people who turn up with a pleasant looking youngster in tow.

Never a particular bother as far as I can see.

[uncleglen]

They are not allowed to study psychology (mmmhhh says it all imo), biology and they are not allowed to do any of this

http://truthrundown.net/jehovah-witness/141-things-jehova-witnesses-cant-do/

[Jah Lush]

Bloody hell! That's restrictive.

This less so.

97. Wear pants at a Kingdom Hall if you?re a woman.

[uncleglen]

Given the nebulous nature of black and white magic I bet some of them have inadvertently practised both.

[alice]

'a ship with 2 captains will always run aground'

[malumbu]

I quite liked a few of them (what they weren't allowd to do). Surprisingly progressive (my take on rules that are probably anything but).

uncleglen Wrote:

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> They are not allowed to study psychology (mmmhhh

> says it all imo), biology and they are not allowed

> to do any of this

> http://truthrundown.net/jehovah-witness/141-things

> -jehova-witnesses-cant-do/

[JohnL]

rendelharris Wrote:

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> Oddly they don't vote either, as apparently only

> God, not man, can decide who leads us - I remember

> when Obama was first elected Serena Williams

> saying she was so thrilled to have a black

> president but she hadn't voted for him as it

> wasn't permitted.

>

> Not sure what they think of God's choice for the

> next four years...

The Young Pope mentioned that for Catholics in Episode 5.

[Brendanse5]

JW's need to understand how the postal system works. I received a card from the Postman stating a letter has been sent to "Householders" at my address and I need to pay ?2 to have the letter resent as there is no stamp on it. I was suspicious about the addressee but my inquisitiveness got the best of me so I paid for it online. I just received the said hand written letter from a lovely lady from the Dulwich Congregation of Jehova's Witnesses on Scylla Road. I will definitely not be joining or answering "Who is God" or "Does Science agree with the Bible? but will ask "How do you think the RoyalMail postal system works" lol

[KidKruger]

I ask them to hold on a mo, then go get my huge bronze Buddha, set it down on the step and talk them through the eightfold path, wheel of fortune and general Mahayana story - not allowing interruptions.

Does the trick !