Jump to content

Recommended Posts

One of the happy things I remember most about my pregnancy was how much my husband and I laughed. My husand has never laughed so much with me as when I was pregnant. When I say I like a man with a sense of humour, I mean as much someone who is funny, as who thinks I'm funny too.


But the Baby killed my sense of humour.


With sleepless nights and endless hours alone feeding and rocking and watching daytime tele, sense of humour was the first thing to go after Little Saff was born. I wasn't funny anymore. Worse still, I didn't find anything else funny anymore. The bottom had dropped out of my supply of funny.


It's been a year-and-a-half now, and I finally feel like my 'funny levels' are creeping back towards normal. I might never be as funny as I was when I was pregnant (I know I'll never be as well-rested!), but at least I feel more like the world might be laughing with me again, instead of at me!!


Did the Baby kill your sense of humour too? How long did it take to get it back?

:)

Longer than I imagined!

My ch were good sleepers but I found the whole responsibility thing daunting (and still do!). It tires me and makes me snap sometimes. I am more serious a person and less light hearted, partly because I am constantly convinced something awful is about to happen- falls, scissors, edges of things. That sort of ongoing concern!

I sometimes have to laugh otherwise I would cry! Thinking of running through the house yesterday with an explosive bottomed baby, sluicing him

Under the bath tap then he slipped and banged his head


Just as I am juggling one slippery bawling baby I have a toddler holding on to each of my legs, each trying to get my attention for their various projects


I think it was a missing hand bag and a certainty I had promised hammy dodgers all round


So.. Mad laughter ... Present and correct


What I am missing is my memory, my attention span and my ability to relax


I am always spotting thIngs that need to be done and forgetting I planned to watch a tv programme or hAve a cup of tea

It's so true, I've totally lost my sense of humour, mrf & I used to laugh & joke a lot, now we talk about how much sleep babyf has had that day. I've also lost all ability to talk about anything else other than babies (got to start reading the news rather than the forum whilst feeding!)

Just after Cheeky S was born, me and my husband watched a Michael McIntyre DVD. It was funny but I couldn't laugh, because it all seemed so POINTLESS when I had a tiny baby to feed/worry about.


I don't think I got my SOH back and that me and my husband really 'connected' again until we got our evenings back and a decentish chunk of sleep per night (as opposed to 2/3 hours in a 24hr period, ugh). This didn't happen till the baby was about 9mo old. We still talk a lot about various baby/toddler things, and I've never discussed my cervix (!!!) so much with someone other than a MW/OB before in my life (sorry, Mr B...) but I can see us getting back to 'normal'. Ish.


Hope we're not as baby brained this time round!

Think this is a really spot on thread - and something I recognise.


However, I promise when they get a bit older, they can crack you up - watching my 6-year old daughter this morning in a padded spider mans outfit and a pair of high heeled shoes. My 4-year old asking if a pirate ship is used to transport goods overseas. Them saying 'Good morning Darling' to me at the start of the day. There are moments of hilarity every day, which are essential along with the other moments of drudge and poo.


Edited to add... your sense of humour changes - I remember cracking up at various comedy clubs pre-children, and I just don't think I would find it so funny any more. However, I do remember, after first child was born, a Ben Elton comedy 'Blessed' was on the beeb, Ardal O'Hanlan and Mel Geidroyc as a couple with a baby and toddler, and I felt like someone got it, and it was funny because it was exactly how I felt. The same for 'outnumbered' now - which pre-kids I would have thought was probably pointless telly! Now, I think they may well be bugging our house for ideas!

I think the main humour we shared in the early days was a dry sort, you know when everything feels like it's going wrong and you're in a sinking ship together? But as above, it does get funnier, and at 2.5 we get a lot of laughs provided for us (unintentionally) by my son. I can't now go in and check on him at night without cracking up, remembering how a few weeks ago we crept in and were looking down on him tenderly - then he basically twitched his legs in his sleep and farted up into our faces. I had to race from the room in hysterics and will always find that nightly visit funny now.

I think the funniest moment for us was some weeks ago. My wife had just started labour at about 2am in the morning. We were lying in bed debating when to phone the midwives, timing contractions, chatting etc. At one point I turned to her and in all seriousness said - "I wonder what I should wear". We both looked at each other and cracked up!


11 hours later my beautiful daughter was born! I have hardly stopped smiling since!

I've had a sense of humour by-pass the last 4 years! But what does help is picking up the camera and taking a photo of the various stages of madness and I can usually laugh at it by looking backwards. Laughing in the present moment is not something I have quite mastered!
Yes that's true. I have video evidence of Little Saff eating catfood and photos of her after covering herself with an entire pot of Sudocrem. Catfood episode: I thought was very funny; husband not so amused... his sense of humour needing some adjusting too. Sudocrem episode: Not so funny at the time, but hilarious in retrospective (even husband agrees).

Sudocrem is evil stuff, I've heard of a few Mum's having a very bad day clearing it up after their little one got hold of it, you are not alone Saffron.


Looking back I realise (though don't really understand how it's possible), that whilst being truly delighted with the arrival of our 2nd little girl, I was really not very nice to live with for the first couple of years of her life. I think all my energy was going into looking after her and her sister, and coping with the lack of sleep, and my poor old hubby got all the back lash.


Thankfully humour has returned to our lives now, and as others have said, in large doses now we have a cheeky 'almost 3' year old, and a '7 going on 17' year old to entertain us. I shall enjoy the 'honeymoon' until the next lot of angst starts when we really do hit the teenage years (eek).


:-S

  • 1 month later...

It's laughing in the face of adversity that I find hardest now.


Someone please help me find the humour in this...


2:30am: bitten nipple, screaming toddler refused bottle and soaked our bed in p1ss after tantrum-induced nappy leak. Hurrah.


Someone recently told me that toddlers that wake frequently at night are often very intelligent. Daughter must be a fecking einstein!!!! Grrrrr.

Wonderful news about toddlers who wake at night.......glad there's some point to the torture!! (Please don't tell me otherwise....I don't care if it isn't true, it makes me feel better.)


Definitely agree re the loss of humour. I do laugh more with the kids now but I struggle to lose myself in 'fluffy' TV...when I do get to see some, I feel like I want it to be decent when what I probably need is 'fluff'.

Saffron; my sympathies!!!! On lex's second night home, she woke for a feed at Some Ungodly Hour, then proceeded to vomit up said feed all over herself, me and the bed. Cue entire babygro change, during which we discovered a meconium filled nappy had leaked. During all this, seb had woken up and when Mr B got up to settle him, he got sicked on; but not harmless newborn sick- full on toddler sick. Both babies fell back asleep happily but me and Mr B were left covered in god knows what and thoroughly unimpressed.


May I suggest you mention this to any future boyfriends Mini Saff has in the future? Mwa ha ha ha!

Saffron this thread is sooooooo true. After the umpteenth 'cry on husband in the kitchen' session today, I really am starting to wonder if I'll ever just let rip and belly laugh again! No-one really tells you what long term sleep deprivation does to the soul (god that sounds over drammatic, I just have an early rising daughter, that's all). We're off on holiday tomorrow for the first time since DD arrived 9 months ago and I'm hopeful the change of scene will unearth the lighter hearted side of me that seems to have gotten lost in baby-world. Heres to some good ol' fashioned laughter for us all! x
...and under the heading, Shouldn't Be Funny But It Is! ...Little Saff got hold of a pot of Tiger Balm while I was cooking dinner. She then managed to get the lid off and smear it on her arms, chest, and chin. No blocked noses here tonight! Hahahaha!!!!!

Can relate to a lot of this, going through it at the moment. Sleep deprivation and full-time child-caring makes me horrible:'(


Our one-year-old hates the car and will scream and screech for hours on end on long journeys, it is awful. Nothing works. But last night on a hideous journey decided to shove on music and Alice Deejay's "Better off Alone" shut her up completely and she then fell asleep!


:))

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Latest Discussions

    • Last week we had no water for over 24 hours and very little support from Thames Water when we called - had to fight for water to be delivered, even to priority homes. Strongly suggest you contact [email protected] as she was arranging a meeting with TW to discuss the abysmal service
    • The is very low water pressure in the middle of Friern Road this morning.
    • I think mostly those are related to the same "issues". In my experience, it's difficult using the pin when reporting problems, especially if you're on a mobile... There's two obvious leaks in that stretch and has been for sometime one of them apparently being sewer flooding 😱  
    • BBC Homepage Skip to content Accessibility Help EFor you Notifications More menu Search BBC                     BBC News Menu   UK England N. Ireland Scotland Alba Wales Cymru Isle of Man Guernsey Jersey Local News Vets under corporate pressure to increase revenue, BBC told   Image source,Getty Images ByRichard Bilton, BBC Panorama and Ben Milne, BBC News Published 2 hours ago Vets have told BBC Panorama they feel under increasing pressure to make money for the big companies that employ them - and worry about the costly financial impact on pet owners. Prices charged by UK vets rose by 63% between 2016 and 2023, external, and the government's competition regulator has questioned whether the pet-care market - as it stands - is giving customers value for money. One anonymous vet, who works for the UK's largest vet care provider, IVC Evidensia, said that the company has introduced a new monitoring system that could encourage vets to offer pet owners costly tests and treatment options. A spokesperson for IVC told Panorama: "The group's vets and vet nurses never prioritise revenue or transaction value over and above the welfare of the animal in their care." More than half of all UK households are thought to own a pet, external. Over the past few months, hundreds of pet owners have contacted BBC Your Voice with concerns about vet bills. One person said they had paid £5,600 for 18 hours of vet-care for their pet: "I would have paid anything to save him but felt afterwards we had been taken advantage of." Another described how their dog had undergone numerous blood tests and scans: "At the end of the treatment we were none the wiser about her illness and we were presented with a bill of £13,000."   Image caption, UK pet owners spent £6.3bn on vet and other pet-care services in 2024, according to the CMA Mounting concerns over whether pet owners are receiving a fair deal prompted a formal investigation by government watchdog, the Competition and Markets Authority (CMA). In a provisional report, external at the end of last year, it identified several issues: Whether vet companies are being transparent about the ownership of individual practices and whether pet owners have enough information about pricing The concentration of vet practices and clinics in the hands of six companies - these now control 60% of the UK's pet-care market Whether this concentration has led to less market competition and allowed some vet care companies to make excess profits 'Hitting targets' A vet, who leads one of IVC's surgeries (and who does not want to be identified because they fear they could lose their job), has shared a new internal document with Panorama. The document uses a colour code to compare the company's UK-wide tests and treatment options and states that it is intended to help staff improve clinical care. It lists key performance indicators in categories that include average sales per patient, X-rays, ultrasound and lab tests. The vet is worried about the new policy: "We will have meetings every month, where one of the area teams will ask you how many blood tests, X-rays and ultrasounds you're doing." If a category is marked in green on the chart, the clinic would be judged to be among the company's top 25% of achievers in the UK. A red mark, on the other hand, would mean the clinic was in the bottom 25%. If this happens, the vet says, it might be asked to come up with a plan of action. The vet says this would create pressure to "upsell" services. Panorama: Why are vet bills so high? Are people being priced out of pet ownership by soaring bills? Watch on BBC iPlayer now or BBC One at 20:00 on Monday 12 January (22:40 in Northern Ireland) Watch on iPlayer For instance, the vet says, under the new model, IVC would prefer any animal with suspected osteoarthritis to potentially be X-rayed. With sedation, that could add £700 to a bill. While X-rays are sometimes necessary, the vet says, the signs of osteoarthritis - the thickening of joints, for instance - could be obvious to an experienced vet, who might prefer to prescribe a less expensive anti-inflammatory treatment. "Vets shouldn't have pressure to do an X-ray because it would play into whether they are getting green on the care framework for their clinic." IVC has told Panorama it is extremely proud of the work its clinical teams do and the data it collects is to "identify and close gaps in care for our patients". It says its vets have "clinical independence", and that prioritising revenue over care would be against the Royal College of Veterinary Surgeons' (RCVS) code and IVC policy. Vets say they are under pressure to bring in more money per pet   Published 15 April 2025 Vets should be made to publish prices, watchdog says   Published 15 October 2025 The vet says a drive to increase revenue is undermining his profession. Panorama spoke to more than 30 vets in total who are currently working, or have worked, for some of the large veterinary groups. One recalls being told that not enough blood tests were being taken: "We were pushed to do more. I hated opening emails." Another says that when their small practice was sold to a large company, "it was crazy... It was all about hitting targets". Not all the big companies set targets or monitor staff in this way. The high cost of treatment UK pet owners spent £6.3bn on vet and other pet-care services in 2024 - equal to just over £365 per pet-owning household, according to the CMA. However, most pet owners in the UK do not have insurance, and bills can leave less-well-off families feeling helpless when treatment is needed. Many vets used not to display prices and pet owners often had no clear idea of what treatment would cost, but in the past two years that has improved, according to the CMA. Rob Jones has told Panorama that when his family dog, Betty, fell ill during the autumn of 2024 they took her to an emergency treatment centre, Vets Now, and she underwent an operation that cost almost £5,000. Twelve days later, Betty was still unwell, and Rob says he was advised that she could have a serious infection. He was told a diagnosis - and another operation - would cost between £5,000-£8,000.   Image caption, Betty's owners were told an operation on her would cost £12,000 However, on the morning of the operation, Rob was told this price had risen to £12,000. When he complained, he was quoted a new figure - £10,000. "That was the absolute point where I lost faith in them," he says. "It was like, I don't believe that you've got our interests or Betty's interests at heart." The family decided to put Betty to sleep. Rob did not know at the time that both his local vet, and the emergency centre, branded Vets Now, where Betty was treated, were both owned by the same company - IVC. He was happy with the treatment but complained about the sudden price increase and later received an apology from Vets Now. It offered him £3,755.59 as a "goodwill gesture".   Image caption, Rob Jones says he lost faith in the vets treating his pet dog Betty Vets Now told us its staff care passionately for the animals they treat: "In complex cases, prices can vary depending on what the vet discovers during a consultation, during the treatment, and depending on how the patient responds. "We have reviewed our processes and implemented a number of changes to ensure that conversations about pricing are as clear as possible." Value for money? Independent vet practices have been a popular acquisition for corporate investors in recent years, according to Dr David Reader from the University of Glasgow. He has made a detailed study of the industry. Pet care has been seen as attractive, he says, because of the opportunities "to find efficiencies, to consolidate, set up regional hubs, but also to maximise profits". Six large veterinary groups (sometimes referred to as LVGs) now control 60% of the UK pet care market - up from 10% a decade ago, according to the CMA, external. They are: Linnaeus, which owns 180 practices Medivet, which has 363 Vet Partners with 375 practices CVS Group, which has 387 practices Pets at Home, which has 445 practices under the name Vets for Pets IVC Evidensia, which has 900 practices When the CMA announced its provisional findings last autumn, it said there was not enough competition or informed choice in the market. It estimated the combined cost of this to UK pet owners amounted to £900m between 2020-2024. Corporate vets dispute the £900m figure. They say their prices are competitive and made freely available, and reflect their huge investment in the industry, not to mention rising costs, particularly of drugs. The corporate vets also say customers value their services highly and that they comply with the RCVS guidelines.   Image caption, A CMA survey suggests pet owners are happy with the service they receive from vets A CMA survey suggests pet owners are happy with their vets - both corporate and independent - when it comes to quality of service. But, with the exception of Pets at Home, customer satisfaction on cost is much lower for the big companies. "I think that large veterinary corporations, particularly where they're owned by private equity companies, are more concerned about profits than professionals who own veterinary businesses," says Suzy Hudson-Cooke from the British Veterinary Union, which is part of Unite. Proposals for change The CMA's final report on the vet industry is expected by the spring but no date has been set for publication. In its provisional report, it proposed improved transparency on pricing and vet ownership. Companies would have to reveal if vet practices were part of a chain, and whether they had business connections with hospitals, out-of-hours surgeries, online pharmacies and even crematoria. IVC, CVS and Vet Partners all have connected businesses and would have to be more transparent about their services in the future. Pets at Home does not buy practices - it works in partnership with individual vets, as does Medivet. These companies have consistently made clear in their branding who owns their practices. The big companies say they support moves to make the industry more transparent so long as they don't put too high a burden on vets. David Reader says the CMA proposals could have gone further. "There's good reason to think that once this investigation is concluded, some of the larger veterinary groups will continue with their acquisition strategies." The CMA says its proposals would "improve competition by helping pet owners choose the right vet, the right treatment, and the right way to buy medicine - without confusion or unnecessary cost". For Rob Jones, however, it is probably too late. "I honestly wouldn't get another pet," he says. "I think it's so expensive now and the risk financially is so great.             Food Terms of Use About the BBC Privacy Policy Cookies Accessibility Help Parental Guidance Contact the BBC Make an editorial complaint BBC emails for you Copyright © 2026 BBC. The BBC is not responsible for the content of external sites. Read about our approach to external linking.
Home
Events
Sign In

Sign In



Or sign in with one of these services

Search
×
    Search In
×
×
  • Create New...