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*Swans into quiet room.*


*Smiles warmly at Mr Keef.*


*Fishes his opera glasses out of enormous handbag and passes them over.*


*Observes outragous behaviour of mud wrestling protestants.*


*Tuts to self.*


Cracks open bottle of Krug, and pulls Mr Keefs special chair up close to window beside own chair. Turns on radio 4...

*Pokes head in the door, eyes scan the room for a certain virago*

*Cool, it's quietened down, sends the cleaners home with a big tip*

*Pours self a very strong coffee, lights a Marlboro Red*

*Lies down on large sofa to ease the aching bones*

*Pulls out copy of the Indy, breathes sigh of relief*

*Peace & quiet at last*

*Walks purposefully into the quiet room feeling proud of self (whats new?) but today in the manner of Eliot Ness...*


Thinks to self; "Dulwich is now a safer place."


*Opens bottle of Champagne.*


*Looks around for chums to share a drink.*


*Puts video of "The untouchables" in machine, slips off shoes - admires pedicure and settles down to watch film feeling smug.*

*Opens large fan, obscures facial features and enormous glass of wine*


*Flounces over to harpsichord, begins to play self pened piece*


*Runs long fingered (lace gloved) hand through ringlets*


Thinks to self - this underwear is a tad restrictive but makes my clevage look fab!...


Smiles while thinking of Mr Ray Winstone...

Tries in vein to put out flames on musical instrument but is driven back by the heat.


Cries "Help, help!" in the manner of Penelope Pitstop.


Wonders how Mr Keef can be so cruel?


*Considers piano-forte replacement whilest holding back of hand against brow...*


*Faints due to restrictions on breathing caused by enormous corset.&


*Hits the ground with the tiniest of thuds as is very small and ladylike (and yet incredibly glamorous for a married lady...*

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  • Latest Discussions

    • Link to petition if anyone would like to object: Londis Off-License Petition https://chng.it/9X4DwTDRdW
    • The lady is called Janet 
    • He did mention it's share of freehold, I’d be very cautious with that. It can turn into a nightmare if relationships with neighbours break down. My brother had a share of freehold in a flat in West Hampstead, and when he needed to sell, the neighbour refused to sign the transfer of the freehold. What followed was over two years of legal battles, spiralling costs and constant stress. He lost several potential buyers, and the whole sale fell through just as he got a job offer in another city. It was a complete disaster. The neighbour was stubborn and uncooperative, doing everything they could to delay the process. It ended in legal deadlock, and there was very little anyone could do without their cooperation. At that point, the TA6 form becomes the least of your worries; it’s the TR1 form that matters. Without the other freeholder’s signature on that, you’re stuck. After seeing what my brother went through, I’d never touch a share of freehold again. When things go wrong, they can go really wrong. If you have a share of freehold, you need a respectful and reasonable relationship with the others involved; otherwise, it can be costly, stressful and exhausting. Sounds like these neighbours can’t be reasoned with. There’s really no coming back from something like this unless they genuinely apologise and replace the trees and plants they ruined. One small consolation is that people who behave like this are usually miserable behind closed doors. If they were truly happy, they’d just get on with their lives instead of trying to make other people’s lives difficult. And the irony is, they’re being incredibly short-sighted. This kind of behaviour almost always backfires.  
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