Quiet room...

[red devil]

*Pinches nose...coughs...splutters...brushes cobwebs away...opens French Doors...*

It's Spring! :)

[El Pibe]

*glowers in grey, dank corner*

*mumbles* speak for yerself

[KalamityKel]

*glances over in other corner wondering what the furry mass is...*

[Michael Palaeologus]

*Well I suppose the Spring clean should start*

*Could somebody take El Pibe outside, drape him over the washing line and give him a good beating? He is a tad dusty*

*There's a great big totem pole in the backyard. That's houldnt surprise me really*

*I'll clear the leaves out of the pool and take the dust sheets off ????, Otta and Jah Lush. That's a start*

[Alan Medic]

*tiptoes in*

*looks round.........no sign of a hundred in here*

*tiptoes out before being caught*

[Muley]

Pulls black balaclava over face and glances round. Nothing moving, or any visible sign of life. Tiptoes in to Quiet Room, silently removes bomb from backpack, conceals it, and sets timer. "Enough Semtex to bring the whole place down. In twenty minutes 'goodbye Quiet Room and all who sail in her'. Mwahahahaha". Exits silently, still laughing evil laugh...

[Michael Palaeologus]

*Tippy-toe marks in the dusty floor?*

*Follows them and finds a brown paper box with an alarm clock attached*

*It has "BOM" painted on it in a childish scrawl*

*Takes it out to the back gate where lives the recycling bin with "BOMS" written on it. Drops the box and alarm clock into it*

[red devil]

Is there anybody therrrrrrre?...

WoooooooOOOOoooOOOoWwwwooooooOOOOOOOOO...

*Legs it...*

[Michael Palaeologus]

*Notes the bemused faces of so many newbies*

*Sadly dusts the painting of Mrs Dobbin the Lactating Donkey and then the recumbent figure of ????, in deep repose in his favourite Chesterfield. Picks up the copy of Razzle from his lap and returns it to the library*

*Peels an unconscious red devil off the non-sliding glass door, straightens his nose and props him on the other end of the Chesterfield*

[red devil]

*Wakes up, rubs nose, looks across at ????, poor bloke, last time he looked that bad was at Reading '77. Decides to write a note...*

Dear ????

At the time of writing you've been asleep now for over 2 years.

When you eventually wake up, you'd better know there's some good news and bad news.

The good news is that West Ham sacked Big Fat Sam.

The bad news is he's England's manager...can't win 'em all eh!

Oh, and we're not in Europe anymore, but being a West Ham fan you'll be used to that by now.

Yours,

Red...

[Otta]

*Creeps out to the pool, sits on the edge with feet dangling in the water, and thinks about those that came before*

*Sigs and makes way to the kitchen to prepare a fish finger sandwich*

[Seabag]

*slides the eyes of across in the painting of Churchill, which hangs on the wall*

*makes note of who's who, from the secret viewing point in the obs room hidden in the paneling*

*folds book and puts it the place its always kept*

*descends ladder into cellar*

[Alan Medic]

*decides to hang out here and wait*

[Michael Palaeologus]

*wonders why Alan is leaning against the fireplace in a nonchalant manner, with his Gentleman's apparatus hanging out? It's not big or clever*

[red devil]

*Seabag, Ferrero Rocher'd out in the Obs room, spies his chance to perform his newly acquired 'Masonic handshake'...*

[TheArtfulDogger]

* pads in softly to quiet room *

* looks around for doggy treats, can't smell or see any *

* cocks leg against fireplace and with a long sizzzzzzzzllllleeee the fire goes out *

* realises that it's now quiet and very very dark in here , lets out a silent but deadly and leaves the room *

[Otta]

*Looks in through the window and wonders why it's gone dark inside*

*Starts tapping on the window with metal key to freak people out*

[Alan Medic]

*shakes a leg.Darn hound*

*chief eyes me with a look of distain. shouldn't bother me its happened hundreds of times before*

*it does though*

[Cat in a Hot Tin Bus]

* CAT slinks in to the room, vision perfectly adjusted to the dark *

* spies seabag in a Ferro coma in the corner near some logs *

* slinks around Alan's legs but realises they smell and are a bit damp *

* smells tripe and dog farts lingering in the air *

* decides to go next Door to where Mr Jolly lives *

[Robert Poste's Child]

*Peels face from pillow where dribble has dried. Blows nose on tissue. Replaces tissue with new one halfway through. Wipes nose with third tissue. Throws tissues on floor. Coughs ... and again ... and again. Replaces duvet over face.*

[Alan Medic]

*hears sobbing coming from a darkened corner*

*speaks quietly............*bob*? *

[Salsaboy]

*from the darkness the reply is heard 'leave me alone'*

[Robert Poste's Child]

*hears what sounds like *bob* and Alan Medic having a lovers' tiff. Stuffs duvet in ears*

[red devil]

*Trips over a duvet and a couple of empty bottles of Dubonnet. Removes tattered pic of Quids from the dart board. Goes up into loft to get the Christmas decs box...*

[diable rouge]

*Trips over Christmas decs box and a couple of empty bottles of Sipsmith Lemon Drizzle Gin. Removes tattered pic of Jah from the dart board. Goes up into loft to get the Valentine's Day decs box...*