KalamityKel Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 A blonde walks into a bank in London and asks to see the Manager.She says she's going to Hong Kong on business for two weeks and needs to borrow ?100.The Manager says the bank will need some kind of security for the loan, so the blonde hands over the keys to a new Ferrari.The car is parked on the street in front of the bank, she has the title and everything checks out.The bank agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan. The Manager and the tellers all enjoy a good laugh at the blonde for using a?100,000 Ferrari as collateral against a ?100 loan.An employee of the bank then proceeds to drive the Ferrari into the bank's underground garage and parks it there.Two weeks later, the blonde returns, repays the ?100 and the interest, which comes to ?41. The Manager says, "Miss, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a millionairess. What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow ?100?"The blonde replies... "Where else in London can I park my car for two weeks for only ?41 and expect it to be there when I return?"Hooray! A smart blonde joke at last!! :o) Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/295-a-joke/page/39/#findComment-204056 Share on other sites More sharing options...
bigbadwolf Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 Did you hear about the Paddy who tried to blow up a car? Burnt his lips on the exhaust pipe. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/295-a-joke/page/39/#findComment-204058 Share on other sites More sharing options...
KalamityKel Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 U sound like me daD! OMG!!!! ::o Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/295-a-joke/page/39/#findComment-204060 Share on other sites More sharing options...
bigbadwolf Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 Eh. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/295-a-joke/page/39/#findComment-204062 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mick Mac Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 bigbadwolf Wrote:-------------------------------------------------------> Did you hear about the Paddy who tried to blow up> a car? Burnt his lips on the exhaust pipe.I'm going to ask that you are banned for racist jokes against the Irish race - never liked you, don't know why they allowed you back..... Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/295-a-joke/page/39/#findComment-204067 Share on other sites More sharing options...
bigbadwolf Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 Sorry Mick Mac, disgraceful behaviour. It's never happen again. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/295-a-joke/page/39/#findComment-204070 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mick Mac Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 To continue the trend: Two female suicide bombers leave their house on a terrorist mission, with ruck sacks on back. One turns to the other and says : "Does my bomb look big in this?" Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/295-a-joke/page/39/#findComment-204073 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mikecg Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 BBW you tread a fine line that I would never cross, you must know it's a wrong by now that that kind of joke is of the menu this day and age, we have moved on from this kind of politically incorrect attempt at humour.In the words of Thom Yorke!You do it to yourself you do, you and no one else........ Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/295-a-joke/page/39/#findComment-204076 Share on other sites More sharing options...
bigbadwolf Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 You don't say. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/295-a-joke/page/39/#findComment-204077 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mikecg Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 And, its never happen again sounds a bit lexdixic, It will never happen again sounds more articulate. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/295-a-joke/page/39/#findComment-204079 Share on other sites More sharing options...
bigbadwolf Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 Well spotted Mike. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/295-a-joke/page/39/#findComment-204080 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mikecg Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 Mick Mac Wrote:-------------------------------------------------------> bigbadwolf Wrote:> --------------------------------------------------> -----> > Did you hear about the Paddy who tried to blow> up> > a car? Burnt his lips on the exhaust pipe.> > I'm going to ask that you are banned for racist> jokes against the Irish race - never liked you,> don't know why they allowed you back.....Hahaha! theres a thread not a million miles away Mick Mac that requested his return with your name on it. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/295-a-joke/page/39/#findComment-204084 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mikecg Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 I know some real bad jokes that I'm desperate to publish but they would be instatntly removed and I'd be banned so I've obstained from publishing them. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/295-a-joke/page/39/#findComment-204086 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mick Mac Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 Hahaha! theres a thread not a million miles away Mick Mac that requested his return with your name on it.I was attempting irony Mike - I think BBW knew that. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/295-a-joke/page/39/#findComment-204089 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mikecg Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 Yes I know but I could not help dishing a dig out to the ribbs of bbw. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/295-a-joke/page/39/#findComment-204090 Share on other sites More sharing options...
bigbadwolf Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 How many Mikecg's does it take to replace a lightbulb? 100. One to hold the lightbulb and 99 to turn the house. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/295-a-joke/page/39/#findComment-204093 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moos Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 Mikecg Wrote:-------------------------------------------------------> I know some real bad jokes that I'm desperate to> publish but they would be instatntly removed and> I'd be banned so I've obstained from publishing> them.They must be pretty full on! I've seen some jokes on this thread that have really shocked me, and no-one pulled them. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/295-a-joke/page/39/#findComment-204095 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mikecg Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 Moos they are beyond a joke and the detractors I currently have would increase 7 fold so I cant let anyone hear them via this site. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/295-a-joke/page/39/#findComment-204096 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mikecg Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 bigbadwolf Wrote:-------------------------------------------------------> How many Mikecg's does it take to replace a> lightbulb? 100. One to hold the lightbulb and 99> to turn the house.We mainly have bayonet fittings now bbw but in your old crusty hovel who knows.Q. What's the difference between BBW and a bucket of sh!tA. The BucketBoom! Boom! Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/295-a-joke/page/39/#findComment-204103 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mick Mac Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 BBW V Mike cg Its getting personal already - should be great reading by midnight tonight when Mike has a few bevvies. I'm going to cancel the babysitter and stay tuned. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/295-a-joke/page/39/#findComment-204105 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mikecg Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 Oh Mick Mac I dont drink and post anymore, you must have noticed? BBW has torn me a new one on many occasions but he always retreats with his tail between his legs in the end. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/295-a-joke/page/39/#findComment-204108 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jah Lush Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 Adopts Scouse accent: - "Eh eh! calm down calm down." Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/295-a-joke/page/39/#findComment-204112 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mick Mac Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 I have noticed you have improved Mike - now you mention it. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/295-a-joke/page/39/#findComment-204115 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mikecg Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 It's a 2 way street though MM. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/295-a-joke/page/39/#findComment-204119 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mikecg Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 Jah Lush Wrote:-------------------------------------------------------> Adopts Scouse accent: - "Eh eh! calm down calm> down."Day do doh dont day doh. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/295-a-joke/page/39/#findComment-204123 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now