Malapropisms...

[david_carnell]

A worker? Woman's never done a day's work in her life.

[first mate]

Another is perspective instead of prospective. Is that her perspective partner? Depends on your point of view.

[Moos]

Someone I know used the phrase 'handled with kitten gloves', having misheard the original. Actually, it's not a bad saying.

[buggie]

slightly different, but I keep thinking I hear adverts on the radio for a Sooty and Sweep tour, when its actually for the Madonna Sticky and Sweet tour...

[Dulwich Born And Bred]

I used to keep saying 'Brought' Something instead of 'Bought' something, some cocky twat finally corrected me not too long ago!

[Asset]

Bush for one is unable to say the word nuclear correctly - nucular - poss not technically a malaprop, just a twit.

[citizenED]

My chum's gran used to offer 'semi-skilled' milk when she made the tea...

[jumpinjackflash]

Why do people pronouce 'et cetera' 'eksetera'? There is no C or K. Really winds me up - that and what Keef said about Pacific!

[Moos]

re: firstmate's comment, can we get into just plain wrong? Less fun, I know...

Disinterested for uninterested is so annoying, and impoverishing for the language.

edited because just read Citizen's post (must learn to turn the page) and laughed out loud at the idea of semi-skilled milk. Very East Dulwich - excuse me, is the milk fully skilled? I only drink fully skilled milk...

[LostThePlot]

Peckhamgatecrasher Wrote:

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> Vanessa Feltz was extremely rude.... Reckon she missed breakfast.

That's looks unlikely.....

I think my favorite was said by a friends father, describing their cat, which was crouched behind a bush, it's eye's fixed on a bird nearby...

"Look at him, all wound up like a tiger ready to bounce..."

Also, I will drop "The world is my lobster" into conversations, just to see if if it gets any remarks.

At a local level, my in-laws are in the west country, where Bristolians have a habit of adding an additional "L" onto the end of words that end in "A". So A trip to the supermarket becomes "I went to to Asdal, with Natashal" took me a bloody age to work out what they were doing.

Oh, and not a malaprop, but why the hell do people in the west midlands talk about "Islands" instead of roundabouts like the rest of us....never got to the bottom of that one.

[VeryBerryCherry]

LostThePlot Wrote:

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> Oh, and not a malaprop, but why the hell do people

> in the west midlands talk about "Islands" instead

> of roundabouts like the rest of us....never got to

> the bottom of that one.

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Ha ha ha - funny, coming from the W Mids myself I have never noticed that we do that (we do).

Or that no-one else in the country does.

[Tony.London Suburbs]

Mine is people saying "anymore" instead of "any more".

Any more then?

[SteveT]

LostThePlot wrote: west midlands talk about "Islands" instead of roundabouts

The East midlands also call them 'islands' too. American visitors find them difficult to negotiate.

[Brendan]

Christ on a dyke!

[VeryBerryCherry]

My sister was chatting to me the other day and talking about how she went on a date with this model. And the conversation turned to their day-to-day lifestyle, his being infinitely more glamorous than my sister's.

"yes, so I started telling him about work and netball, but in comparison to his life in LA, mine seemed so b-anal"

Yes, as in the the retentive variety.

Not quite a malapropism, but it made me slide off my sofa in fits of laughter... Particulary when she told me that that was the exact same phrase she said to him.

And yeah, there was no second date!

[nunheadbelle]

Bellenden Belle Wrote:

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>> And recently - I literally mean months ago - I

> relayed a story to several different friends where

> I refered to going for someone's juggernaut during

> an argument.

I nearly fell off my seat laughing! :))

[georgia]

Am from the W Mids and I have always called roundabouts 'islands', though no idea why

[Brendan]

Island makes sense though. It is an island in the middle of the road. Where I grew up a roundabout is one of those things with the painted horse on it at a fairground. But then we call traffic lights, robots so go figure.

[AcedOut]

People who say "electronical equipment" for example, really winds me up!

[VeryBerryCherry]

After a night out I was complaining to Mr VBC about this rude guy who was out with all his mates. They looked like they were having a good time, apart from this guy, who was spending most of his evening ignoring his mates while tapping away on his blueberry!

[El Pibe]

Ok, more of an eggcorn than a malapropism, but just read "passed with flying collars" in Neal Stephenson's Snow Crash which made me chuckle.

Hmmm, should have saved that one up for my drink with ma boab

[Huguenot]

First time I encountered the word 'eggcorn'...

[El Pibe]

I dug into where the term comes from and it was coined by someone from the deep south mistakingly using that spelling for acorn.

Apparently it's not unknown in the deep south, where if you affect that accent it kind of makes sense that you might think that, plus, you know, they're egg shaped......

[maxxi]

...and great yolks from little eggcorns grow.

A friend of mine was notorious for mangling his idioms when teaching his students; they were "Green behind the ears" or might "open a barrel of worms" but would put "all hands behind the pump". Any promise of excellence would be met with a knowing wink and "Ah, that'd be cake on top!"

[Huguenot]

Don't judge him, he's not a book you know.