*Bob*

I'm still waiting for my visit. I'm looking forward to it, I really am.

So.. 16 restaurants which all serve much-of-a-muchness food on one short stretch of high street? Aren't we blessed! I was told a delivery service from Ganapati was on the way, but I don't think it's materialised yet. It is (as others say) the only decent place to eat within so many miles. But (having no competition) it's very expensive. The last time we ordered a takeaway for two it was over ?25. I don't mind paying that to eat in the restaurant, but it seems a little extravagant for a takeaway. And I'm finding the menu a little limited now. If we had a MIRCH on LL it would be curtains for half the others.

Went out for meal last night - new Italian place. Oh yeah? - what was it like? Yeah.. alright.. not too salty. Saw that film last night. Oh yeah? - what was it like? Yeah.. alright.. not too long. Went to that new nightclub last night. Oh yeah? What was it like? Yeah.. alright.. not too loud.

How oily is the Mirash then? Just oily enough? Not quite oily enough? I love way that 'oiliness' is the yardstick by which a good curry is measured.

Like a drunken uncle who keeps turning-up at parties and repeating himself.. here I am! Why do people drink Budweiser? Why would anyone buy a car with a spoiler on it? Why don't most people know how to cook rice properly? These and the interminable proliferation of mediocre 'curry houses' on Lordship Lane are just some of those little mysteries in life as yet unexplained.

We need to bring the mountain to Mohammed, Kel. Just a soft drink for him though, please.

Ooh la la. If you have a 'problem boiler' an insurance policy is worth its weight in gold. My dear old Ma must be on British Gas's hit list.. her boiler has cost them well over a grand in the space of two years.. They must be regretting that twelve quid a month offer they made to her. Most people pay for insurance they'll never need though. But that's insurance all over, isn't it?

You're right, Atila. I'd better not watch it - lest I crack a smile.

Your modern-type condenser boiler doesn't need regular servicing. As Steve says, get someone in if something stops working. If it aint broke..

Dream on. Expect flats.

Birmingham: ?1.50 Swansea: ?2.00 London: ?3.00+ I'm happy to pay the extra.

Is it subsidence, or is it just movement? The old 'one more hot summer' routine suggests that you've had a survey which came back with something along the lines of "the property has suffered significant movement blah blah borderline case for underpinning blah blah one more hot summer blah blah". Surveyors (who are no expert in these matters) give you the worst case scenario in order to cover their arses. If you can get a regular buildings insurance policy (preferably with the lender who also did the survey), then your house hasn't subsided. And if you can live with the possibility that it might need underpinning at some point (along with everyone else in SE22 who's house hasn't been underpinned!) then there's no reason not to go ahead.

January Headline: "Shopkeeper faces possible murder charge just for defending himself and his property" February Headline: "CPS back-down over shopkeeper murder charge" Don't you just love the press?!

'Big Tone' and 'hanging baskets' doesn't quite seem right somehow.

Bugger! It fell through and I ended-up with tea instead. Next time I shall go through Foxtons.

Just off downstairs to match myself up with a cup of coffee. Wish me luck.

But in answer to your question: I think they were about 8 pence.

I think the online freebie check things only go back to 2000, do they not?

Too many choices. If I were you I'd take the easy way out and just soil my ballot paper.

The Big Question.. who goes in the gibbet? Foxton's staff on rotation?

Yeah - probably two steps back three steps forward on the traffic front, I'm sure.. for the short-term anyway. Longer term.. I'm sure traffic in the air is rather like traffic on the ground. You build three new lanes and bask in the joys of the open road for a year or two, but in a few years time you're sitting in the same old jam - just with more lanes.

Maybe the 'other you' knows?

I just can't see the logic there, marky. Heathrow is currently getting as many planes in as it possibly can, because more planes = more business = more profit. The idea that they'd spend a sackload of dosh on a new runway and keep the number of planes coming-in exactly the same is madness. Once it's in, they'll ramp-up the number of planes because the new runway will allow an greater capacity. That's what they're building it for.

You're too trusting, Keefie. Watch out - women will take advantage of your sweet nature.

That isn't a post box, Mockney. Even Islamic fundamentalists like to go raving from time to time.