Bother on the 12

[Bryan Cocksedge]

I have just been accosted by a man trying to sell me apple crumble on the no 12 bus. He had it in a paper bag and I could see there were burnt bits round the edges so I told him to clear off. He muttered some swear words under his beath and then sold a slice to a woman sitting opposite. She took one bite and said it was disgusting. I think this man should be stopped before somebody gets food poisoning.

[sophiesofa]

Or people could just not buy a burnt slice of crumble

[Narnia]

I bought a slice the other day and have never felt better. I believe it's the modern day equivalent of the Salmon of Life.

[Bryan Cocksedge]

Maybe you're right but some people might find it intimidating having a paper bagful of crumble waved in front of their face with a bit of sales patter thrown in for afters. The correct place for this kind of behaviour is in a bakery or at least on a little market stall but not when decent people are minding their own business on the bus!

[????]

Now. If it was Rhuubbarb mmmmmmmmmmmmmm

[HonaloochieB]

The crumble was fine to my palate, but I gave the custard a miss, as I suspected vanilla extract instead of a proper pod like James Martin does on Saturday Kitchen.

[Bryan Cocksedge]

I don't even think he's making them himself as it looks very similar to the extra large frozen packs you get in Iceland except he's sprinkled something on top to make it more authentic and then chopped it into smaller slices. If I see him again I've a good mind to make a grab for his paper bagful of crumble and fling it out the window.

[SeanMacGabhann]

I've avoided the 12 and indeed the whole Barry/Friern Rd area since Bryan warned us of

giant rabbits

[kpc]

How can you sell apple crumble without custard? Or at the very least clotted cream. The vendor should be reported to TfL immediately.

As for rhubarb, disgusting stuff. The Stalk of the Devil.

[Brendan]

Ah rhubarb, the grandmothers preferred tool for hitting boundaries.

[northlondoner]

kpc Wrote:

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> How can you sell apple crumble without custard? Or

> at the very least clotted cream. The vendor should

> be reported to TfL immediately.

>

But KPC, what about public health issues? This country is in the teeth of an obesity crisis. If one is eating dessert on the bus, the only "healthy" accompaniment is surely creme fraiche or perhaps frozen yoghurt.

If eating custard or cream, the rider/diner would be forced to get off several stops early to walk off the fattening effects.

Perhaps the in-bus caterer should start doing fruit salads, now that it's summer.

Mind you a pizza and beer on the long ride home on the number 12 might prove a hit.

[daizie]

Was this in Peckham ? Better than being stabbed .

[RosieH]

Had it been a gooseberry cobbler on the other hand...

Or a rhubarb fool...

Or a plum duff...

[ImpetuousVrouw]

I think it was the same chap who offered me his spotted dick.

[kpc]

Maybe they should convert one of the standing areas into a 'buffet' for the sale of a selection of desserts, fast foods and (alcoholic) beverages. But definitely no rhubarb. Or gooseberries.

[HonaloochieB]

RosieH Wrote:

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> Had it been a gooseberry cobbler on the other

> hand...

Oh stop RosieH, would you honestly want a third uninvited person attempting to repair your footwear, while you were on a date?

>

Or a rhubarb fool...

Or even worse, mumble in an actorly fashion, while trying to tell the King the truth, because of course he can't hear you, because you're mumbling.

> Or a plum duff...

It's a plum duff, it's ridiculous. Little Jack Horner 'stuck in his thumb' and furthermore, apparently, 'pulled out a plum'.

That's just plain daft, a thumb is an opposable digit, and it's unlikely the thumb alone would have had the capability of plum-pulling.

Thumb and forefinger?

Now you're talking.

Still...

[katie1997]

ImpetuousVrouw Wrote:

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> I think it was the same chap who offered me his

> spotted dick.

tee hee - just be glad he didn't offer Toad-In-The-Hole as a 'main course' ;)

[RosieH]

HonaloochieB Wrote:

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> It's a plum duff, it's ridiculous. Little Jack

> Horner 'stuck in his thumb' and furthermore,

> apparently, 'pulled out a plum'.

> That's just plain daft, a thumb is an opposable

> digit, and it's unlikely the thumb alone would

> have had the capability of plum-pulling.

> Thumb and forefinger?

> Now you're talking.

> Still...

Oh Hona, don't be such a tard. The plum is cooked, stoopid - so your thumb goes right in, and then you can pull it out, like a thumbplum lollypop.

You clearly need Woof or someone to give you some cooking lessons.

[KalamityKel]

Is there a particular time one should b on this bus? could b handy for those unexpected invites from ppl u dont really like but feel u should go just to show ur face and prove that ur alive party type thing :))

[RosieH]

Or Kel, for when you can't be arsed cooking dinner...?

[KalamityKel]

wiv my cooking... well... I guess it wouldnt hurt ;-)

[Bryan Cocksedge]

My best description of this shady fellow is of a hairy legged younger Wilfred Bramble with what looks like a tattooed ferret on his forearm. The type you'd keep an eye on if you ran a newsagents. Some may think this is a laughing matter but if he forced his wares on an elderly aunt or a timid neighbour I'm sure there'd be more of an outcry about the apple crumble.

[HonaloochieB]

Bryan Cocksedge Wrote:

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> My best description of this shady fellow is of a

> hairy legged younger Wilfred Bramble with what

> looks like a tattooed ferret on his forearm.

Oh, thank Richard Dawkins, for a while there I thought it was me.

When I'm engrossed in my Linda Smith book on the 12, I can be up to all sorts without me knowing about them.

[HonaloochieB]

RosieH Wrote:

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> HonaloochieB Wrote:

> --------------------------------------------------

> -----

>

> > It's a plum duff, it's ridiculous. Little Jack

> > Horner 'stuck in his thumb' and furthermore,

> > apparently, 'pulled out a plum'.

> > That's just plain daft, a thumb is an opposable

> > digit, and it's unlikely the thumb alone would

> > have had the capability of plum-pulling.

> > Thumb and forefinger?

> > Now you're talking.

> > Still...

>

> Oh Hona, don't be such a tard. The plum is

> cooked, stoopid - so your thumb goes right in, and

> then you can pull it out, like a thumbplum

> lollypop.

>

> You clearly need Woof or someone to give you some

> cooking lessons.

Sorry RosieH, but a cooked plum just wouldn't attatch itself itself to a thumb in the way you describe.

We scientists have proven so with our slipperiness theory of fruit.

So there, as we in the scientific community usually put it.

But lollypops? Now you're talking, even us white-coated lab-hounds need a break occasionally.

Did you know that sugar-rush thing might not be true, by the way?

Still, mine's a rhubarb and custard Chupa-Chup if you're asking.

[Moos]

Bryan Cocksedge Wrote:

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..with what looks like a tattooed ferret on his forearm.

Pure art. jrussel, you've been outclassed.