What is your favourite expression?

[Jah Lush]

Got a face like a butcher's dog.

[Keef]

That's interesting Jah, when I lived in Liverpool they used to say "got a face like a robber's dog"... Guess the butcher trade wasn't doing too well at the time, and robbers are far more common up there ;-)

At uni a common one with the lads in my hall was "Jog on shitter!"

[sallyfran]

One I got from my mother-in-law and use often when I am pissing around/putting off doing something/looking on the EDF when I should be working:

"This won't get the baby a new 'at"

[Jah Lush]

Yer can't tell yer arse from yer elbow.

[Brendan]

Well cut off my cock and call me Sally.

[Narnia]

I like one my since departed father informed us of from his fishing days in Mayo (West of Ireland). 'Shite on the Killala boys'. Why these boys ever merited such a comment I've no idea but with remaining family it's sort of used intermittently to express any form of dissatisfaction.

[MadWorld74]

Holy F*cking Mother of God.....is pretty good.

[Bellenden Belle]

Better than a slap in the face with a wet fish.

(the 'better than a' should be slurred - with the aid of gin if necessary)

[bob]

I'm so hungry my belly thought my throat was cut.

She was'nt hit with the ugly stick she fell in the forest and touched every f###ing tree.

She was so fat I roled her in flour and said fart to give us some indication.

Bob S

[Keef]

It'll put lead in your pencil.

[citizenED]

"Soon come!" always makes me smile

Jamaicans would get one meaning - smutty minded Forumites another.

[mattham]

some favorites:

so hungry I could eat my own arm

face like a slapped arse

better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick

bloody hellfire

I'd rather remove my eyeballs with a spoon (when faced with watching some band you don't like etc)

but more usually:

oh, fu*k that.

[SeanMacGabhann]

any kind of tardiness is often met with my brother's exclamation:

"look it - 12 o clock and not a child in the house washed!"

[Michael Palaeologus]

Face like a bag of spanners

Face like a bulldog chewing a wasp

Well blow me down and stand me up again

Roberts your Mothers Brother

[jumpinjackflash]

"Up and down like a whoare's drawers" (my boss says it all the time!). He also refers to attractive ladies as 'fine looking fillies". Also, if I ask my boyfriend "What's that smell?" he'll say "It's your top lip". made me laugh at first....not anymore though!

[SteveT]

when uncontrolled kids are being screaming pains in the rectum (pronounced arse) and ignored by seemingly deaf (pronounced lazy idle couldn't careless useless) parent "shut it" growled through clenched teeth, whilst walking away, usually works.

[david_carnell]

Michael Palaeologus Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> Face like a bag of spanners

>

> Face like a bulldog chewing a wasp

>

> Well blow me down and stand me up again

>

> Roberts your Mothers Brother

I've always liked:

Face like a bulldog licking piss off a stinging nettle

or

Fell out the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down

[Brendan]

Here are a few that (I think) are specifically localised to the group of friends I grew up with. We still use them today normally to the bemusement of our respective spouses.

Cockwobble. As in: Don?t catch a cockwobble. When telling someone not to overreact.

Fuckcake. As in: What are you doing you fuckcake?!

Mucklefucked. As in: I was completely mucklefucked. When referring to being in a confused, normally drug/alcohol induced state.

[Michael Palaeologus]

Similarly:

Fuckwit

[TillieTrotter]

I havent laughed so much since Auntie Mabel caught her left tit in a mangle.

[jumpinjackflash]

My crazy Aunt in Sheffield when hot says "It's like bleeding hot bob in 'ere" or when cold says "It's like bleeding cold bob in 'ere". If there are any Sheffieldonians on the forum, please do tell me who Bob is (not *bob* - know who he is!)

[Brendan]

I haven?t seen one of those since Pa fell off the bus.

[Bellenden Belle]

Michael Palaeologus Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> Similarly:

>

> Fuckwit

I was once introduced to a bloke known as a bit of a lad with the ongoing joke that he always had a "fuckbuddy"

Slightly tipsy but with the intention of making pleasant conversation I smiled enthusiastically and said "Soooooo, I hear you've got a new fuckwit in your life".

[b]

"You are a ball licker because you do, in fact, lick balls..."

[Brendan]

"It is you who are the ball lickers."