Church at top of Barry Road

[acumenman]

I thought the two murders were the important part of the statement,

not which part of the road the victims met their untimely demise!

[BarryRhode]

It's a long, long road

I've never felt anything but safe for myself, my wife or children

It's way safer than OK for a London Borough

And everyone I know who lives there thinks so too

[SarahO]

:I udnerstand this post was a little while ago now but I was wondering if anything was done about it?

Because I too am being pestered by these men standing outside.

I should feel safe walking to work, but no. I have to run past this place before these men whistle at me or shout vulgar things at me!

[Pugwash]

What do you mean by being pestered? From my experience, the men congregate in the car park area in front of the church and are rarely on the pavement. Many years ago when the hostel first opened it housed homeless families from all over south london. Many of these families were aweful, children running screaming in the street, fighting, adults swearing and argueing, the noise was terrible. Following a local petition, homeless families were refused the right of stay there as the hostel owners were facing several hundreds of ?s in damages each week where the place was wrecked. Since Barry House has had different clientele - local residents lives have been much more peaceful.

[skyblue]

I have never experienced any negative encounters from the people staying at the church in all the time I have lived in East Dulwich. Can you begin to imagine how difficult thier lives must be and what stories they must have to tell?

[skyblue]

and I would further like to say that in 3 years of passing Barry House every day, when these families are lining up to be sent off on coaches into the unknown, that I have experienced nothing but politeness as I walk by on my way to another day of unappreciated freedom.

[hpsaucey]

HI traceyjp - not really on message, but I would like to donate items to this place as it sounds as though they might be gratefully received?

Helen

traceyjp Wrote:

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> I am 30 seconds from the Barry road church. I have

> never had a problem. Yes alot of men hanging

> around outside,because they have nothing else to

> do.These people arrive from countries with awful

> problems and lord knows what they have witnessed

> and what they may be escaping from.

> I have donated kids clothes,toys,bedding etc. and

> even a sofa. The alleged "awful" men came to my

> house to collect the sofa and were truly decent

> folk.

>

> Please reconsider "buddha" and think about what

> you are trying to relay. AND think about less

> fortunate people.

> If you are a true buddha,you should get it? I wish

> you well.

[????]

Sorry...are we talking about The Castle?

[SarahO]

I have been trying my best to ignore their comments and keep my head down, however last night I was coming home from a friends house and one man stopped me in the street. (he stood right infront of me so i had to stop) and said he'd seen me earlier in the day walking my dog (which is true) but of course I hadnt noticed him.

He asked me my name and I know I should have made one up but I just wanted to get home and I told him my real name. As I walked away he started shouting my name and saying 'I'll see you again!'

Now I am constantly worried about walking past this place incase this man shouts my name. I know I could get a 197 or a 12 to the top of the road but if Im in a hurry for work I dont want to be waiting around for a bus to go one stop.

[Saila]

SarahO

I'm curious to know how you think people can help here?

If feel that you are being seriously harassed then go to your local police station

Or alternatively ignore it and walk on?

[ianr]

Would you be having this trouble if he were a dog? Maybe try applying the same skills? Clear firm communication that you don't like or want particular behaviours?

You said: "I should feel safe walking to work, but no. I have to run past this place before these men whistle at me or shout vulgar things at me!"

What specifically have they shouted?

[northlondoner]

Cripes didn't even know this place existed and I live five minutes away. Acumenman nobody is saying it's ok to call after women. If they're doing it the Old Bill ought to be involved. But from the tone of your post I suspect a semi in rickmansworth and a subscription to the Express are in your future !

[AC1964]

Seems to me that two different issues are being discussed here...

1) That some of the people that use the centre in question may have lived through some dire personal situations and warrant sympathy, understanding.

2) That some people - women - have experienced a degree of harassment/perceived harassment from some of the same people.

In my humble opinion 1) does not excuse 2) nor serve as mitigation for 2) as some people seem to be implying. But, unfortunately, 2) *can* have a negative effect on 1).

Seems to me that if any women experience harassment from this or any other quarter, then the local police would be interested in hearing!

[Dulwich_ Park_ Fairy]

..

[TillieTrotter]

.

[duchessofdulwich]

if the heckiling becomes offensive and you feel vunerable its best to contact the police

[Beej]

Not to make light of this but, personally, I've always wanted get wolf whistled at!

[*Bob*]

Wolf whistles from athletic floppy-haired hunk carrying iPhone - bat eyelashes

Wolf whistles from unshaven swarthy furriners - call police

[SarahO]

Even if it was an 'athletic floppy haired hunk carrying an Iphone'

If you make it obvious you do not want to be talking to them, it becomes a problem!

[mrure]

This Buddha person, apart from being inaptly named, sounds rather a snob and making a mountain out of a molehill. If the individuals at this establishment were not refugees and somewhat down and out, would the attitude be the same.

[WickedStepmother]

SarahO, you are entirely in the right here and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. If you've made clear that you're not happy to be approached by this group of people, then continued wolf whistling, cat calling etc is sexual harrassment at a minimum and there's no earthly reason why you should have to put up with it.

I would suggest a visit to complain to the centre manager. I understand that might be stressful for you. If you would like someone to come with you for support, I'm more than happy to be that person.

I understand there is also some sort of community relations police team working out of the police station on Lordship Lane; they might also be able to offer advice.

[binary_star]

Seems to be a lot of "Well I'm alright Jack!" type posts on this thread. Curious to know how many of those are from 18 yr old girls!!

[uplandsneighbour]

why does being 18 call for special pleading, binary star? the same rules about harassment apply whether 18 or 80

anyway, I walk past there often and never knew there was a hostel there. As others have said, a word with the centre manager should be all that's needed

[binary_star]

uplandsneighbour Wrote:

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> why does being 18 call for special pleading,

> binary star?

It doesn't and I don't recall saying it did.

[Pugwash]

Martin Cambridge is one of the directors there. He is a family man himself and will no doubt be sympathic - telephone number is on the board outside the hostel. I suggest someone other than Buddha note in down when passing.

Adrian Crust is the beat police officer for this area and is very easy to talk with. Adrian's been around the area for about 15 years now and knows most of us who have been here a while. Adrian has Police Surgeries both at Christ Church and the East Dulwich Community Centre.