Quiet room...

[Brendan]

*Extinguishes decent shag with soda siphon*

*Pours her a medicinal, morning absinth*

*Offers bottle to the chinless red coats on the proviso they keep the pyromania to a minimum.*

[citizenED]

*sigh*

*sips*

[????]

Feels almost like the old days

[Huguenot]

*kicks at mark on the floorboards, pushes hands firmly into pockets, and then glowers through the window at the threatening sky*

[Michael Palaeologus]

*Ambles in, loosens bow tie and cumberbund. Slips into aged, velvet armchair*

*Sips a G&T ... Plymouth with lime*

"Whats this? Down the side of the chair"

"Ah yes, the historic copy of Razzle with Dulwichmum's earliest attempt of fame for all to see"

"It still has the stains of Donkey lactation on it"

"Those were the days"

*Stands up, pulls grubby hankie from pocket, walks to north wall and polishes the plaque that hangs there, at a slight angle*

"In Memoriam. Mrs Dobbin. Much loved lactating Donkey of these parts. Slaughtered by Dulwichmum. Graze in peace*

"Snuffle, sob"

[Moos]

*slopes in, snaffles spare spot on sofa*

*nods amicably to all*

*long, luxurious stretch preceeds unladylike snoring noises reminiscent of child-size chainsaw*

[HonaloochieB]

*shuffles in wearing a pair of Church's slippers recently found round Huguenot's gaff*

*looks about furtively*

*leans on mantlepiece and proceeds to read a book on the history of swearing*

[????]

Some opium anyone?

[mockney piers]

*wanders through soupy, cloying fug, breathing in the heady scents*

blimey, no wonder it's quiet in here.

*lies on cushion, beckons over small monkey in waistcoat and fez, takes pipe from the proffered salver*

[HonaloochieB]

*looks round from mantlepiece wonders whether to enquire if the 'O' is locally sourced*

[citizenED]

*deja vu*

*or I just had a mild epileptic incident*

[Mark]

*strolls in and places his smoking blunderbuss on wall and mutters something about pretend natives"

"pours himself a G&T, nods at other G&T aficionados and reclines in a chaise longue and flicks through the latest issue of Jackie*

[Michael Palaeologus]

*Nods in appreciation*

"Good work Wise-One"

*Opens the port - Warres Warrior, young but splendid .... proffers*

"Anybody?"

"Who has the cheese? Somebody must have been to Moo-town today. Shirley?"

[Huguenot]

*enters somewhat haphazardly, having missed the doorhandle but unable to check momentum*

*right leg buckles somewhat as the left hand casts about in vain to catch the door before it swings back against the hinges with an audible crack, already several metres away by now*

*brought up handily by the chesterfield, attempts a change in direction to the louvred drinks cupboard, but sways off course, leading with the shoulder, sporting the studied intent of a man determined but failing to take another direction*

*grabs mercifully at the Ricard on the way past, captures it more by luck than judgement, and is finally laid to ground by the chaise longue with the oiled antimacassar caught in his spectacles*

*swigs once at the neck of the bottle and pours a generous eighth down the chin*

*balefully examines the other residents...*

"Thish iszh the foreighn correshpondents club?"

[Michael Palaeologus]

*Wakes up feeling somewhat stiff (not in a good way) in the comfy velver arm chair, tattered copy of Razzle in one hand, empty bottle of Port in the other*

*There is a whiff of aniseed*

"Splendid, I see Hugenut is recently back from distantly flung parts of the Empire. Smells that way."

"Morning old boy. I would offer you some Port, but some rotter seems to have swigged it all in my sleep. Why are your specs wearing a dress? Is this required in the Levant for purposes of public morality?"

"Where's Mockney's Monkey? I need a pot of tea"

[Huguenot]

*vaguely uneasy feeling that I've done somthing bad*

*pulls squashed fez from under left buttock*

*wonders if sinking feeling will go away if I have another pull at the Ricard*

[Peckhamgatecrasher]

*stumbles into room for eye opener - crashes into a mildly reproving windsor chair*

*stretches out arm, waiting for a drink to appear*

*muses aloud: wonder if Dear Cathy & Claire have any advice for a hangover?*

[Narnia]

*opens door slightly - this is where we keep the failed writers I say to the new member of staff, with a smirk*

*closes door and quietly departs*

*hears a roar from behind the door*

*bloody mary*

[Moos]

*awakes with startled snort*

*gazes with mild wonder at the pot of steaming coffee on a small and wobbly table only a foot away*

*wonders how long it will take to get there*

[Michael Palaeologus]

*Totters over to wobbly table, pours 2 cups of exquisite coffee. Totters onwards, Moos bound*

*Hands over coffee cup. Settles beside Moos. Sits back, gazing dazedly at far wall*

"I must straighten Mrs Dobbin's memorial plaque but not now. My head hurts. Bad people in The Gowlett. Bad people"

[Moos]

*slurps coffee*

bless you, Mr. Plinkyplonk. Tell me, what's behind that door?

[citizenED]

*vanilla triple shot latte with sprinkles atop*

*hmmmmmm...*

*danish swirl - yummy*

nods to MP - too early for a Lucky Strike?

[Moos]

*thinks Blimey, Citizen's turned into a guurl*

*wonders whether might have accidentally thought it out loud*

[Tarot]

Creeps into room steps over groggy Hughnot, jumps on his fez on the floor,kicks the wobbly table,and eats the danish whirl Citizen was saving for when he woke up,had a peek behind the door oh its Narnia cleaning the plaque.

creeps over to coffee pot and tops it up with sleeping pills.Moos snores in her chair, goes to the door an shuts it quitely,

[citizenED]

*Stirs and opens one eye. licks finger and dabs at the crumbs of danish. hmmm...I'm sure I didn't eat all of it the other night. smells coffee. lumbers over to the machine and tops up. Eyes the bottle of JD on the counter. It's gonna be a long night.*

*what's that fluttering sound?"