Jump to content

Recommended Posts

Hi all,


I'm looking for a book that will give me advice on how to make it easier for children when a parent leaves suddenly, when they are too young to go in for lengthy conversations / explanations. People have sweetly been giving me advice but it tends to be appropriate for older children with better comprehension. My eldest is 3 almost 4 and my youngest 1. They 'know' their father 'is not living with us now' but of course my eldest only retains it for so long and then starts to ask when he's coming home again a few hours later. I can't seem to find any books on how to handle it with such young children, so would love to hear if anyone knows of one. Though a couple of people have suggested it, I am keen to avoid taking my children to a child therapist if at all possible, as my own father left when I was 2 and I still recoil at the memory of those therapy sessions that my well meaning mum took us to! Made us feel more 'different' than we already did!

Oh HS I'm so sorry to hear this, I wish I had some words of wisdom for you. In terms of dealing with it on a day to day I've got no clue but if it helps at all my dad left when I was 4 (for the final time!) and I have no recollection of it at all. If you need anything please do give me a shout! X

I am so sorry to hear that. I bought "Mum and Dad glue" to read with my little girl but afraid I can't recommend a specific advice book.


The Gingerbread website was helfpul for more practical things http://www.gingerbread.org.uk and also http://www.familylives.org.uk/advice/divorce-and-separation/your-children/what-to-tell-the-children-about-your-divorce-or-separation/


Look after yourself too.

Thanks all, I ordered the Koko Bear one and it's arrived but seems a bit too grown up at the moment I think. Also, it does use the word divorce a lot as part of the story and my partner and I weren't married so that confuses it a bit, but may tweak my own version. Will look into Divorce Poison and Dinosaurs Divorce too, thanks guys x

There's this too lovely sailor; http://www.amazon.co.uk/Two-Of-Everything-Babette-Cole/dp/0099220628, for the children - though again it may be just that little too old?


Or you could make your own relevant to the children's new circumstances. Use WORD document and add photos and suitable words. or use a story builder app on ipad - something like this maybe? http://www.friendshipcircle.org/apps/browse/stories-about-me/


Or create a personalized photo book on snappish e.g. photos of your/their home & Daddy's new home (if they go for visits)?


I know you really wanted recommendations for books for you; to help you to guide them through this difficult time of change, but I don't know any yet. I'm asking round though, and will post more info as & when I get it. Thinking of you.

SW x

Obviously I don't know your circumstances or current level of communication between you and the kid's dad, but IF you're talking, could you discuss with him how HE could help with this when he sees the kids (if he does).


Best of luck to you.

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Latest Discussions

    • But what are you basing that judgement on? Vibes? where exactly and under what council is money being spent wisely? what about parties which promise to cut waste, come to power and find out there is no waste?   
    • I've just had James from Trelco round doing taps and hot water.  Prompt, efficient and pleasant people and the cost came in under what we thought it would be! Will definitely use them again.
    • Yes - adult care is a large part of the CT bill.  That does not mean the council spend our money well or wisely.        
    • “What do councils spend all the money on?” Is, in my view, one of the most profoundly emblematic of our times  we go about our lives, backed up by councils and governments and complain they aren’t needed  reform win elections based on “we’re gonna go in and slash all the waste!” Only to later admit there effectively isn’t any oh and by the way we need to increase council tax   Now all we have to offer is racism and ineptitude sorry about that  https://www.gbnews.com/money/reform-elon-musk-doge-failed-savings So where does the money go? On a multitude of services - but the increasingly aged population and the care provision required is a large part of it  the government could give councils more money to avoid council tax rises  - but the we would have to pay more in jewels taxation  and as a country we tend to pay less than other similar countries  so we end up with an expensive mend and make do approach  I don’t see any political parties offering a solution   Starmer is obviously lacking in many areas but he is the result of a hostile media and a reluctant population willing to hear truths  (wait until we hear how much we will need to increase defence spending by in the coming years) If a party stopped pretending all the money was wasted but published a list of costs, projections and proposals that wasn’t gutted to suit the landscape of needing to not bemonstered by the press or deemed too expensive by voters I would be very interested      can’t see that happening tho  (also worth reminding ourselves of all the brexiters who said things like “I don’t care how much it costs   I don’t care if I lose my job  it’s about taking back control!” And yet now we find them complaining about increasing costs. As they always will complain about everything  because it’s always someone else’s fault)   
Home
Events
Sign In

Sign In



Or sign in with one of these services

Search
×
    Search In
×
×
  • Create New...