Naive?

[northlondoner]

Uh forgive me but am I hopelessly naive? I returned earlier from a mothers day lunch with severely visually impaired mum and somewhat arthritic dad. Having trolled the Lane for a seeming eternity ( no, like a bad son I hadn't booked anywhere)we eventually settled on the Bishop. I was against it, thinking it too young and buzzy for a middle aged duffer such as myself and his parents.My folks over ruled me and we went in. No appropriate seating was immediately available, so we decided to try elsewhere. But as we made to leave, two separate parties offered to give up their seats for us...we took up one of these offers.

Trivial and simple actions, to be sure, but full of humanity and kindness. And, it seemed to me, full of a kind of "Spirit of ED " - the very thing that helps make this one London's nicest 'hoods. So my question is this...

is ED really a happy place with lots of people making lives with their loved ones - and extending common courtesy and kindness to others? Not in a la-di-da, let;s all hold hands together, sort of way. But rather in the sense of ordinary folk living ordinary lives, reaching out on to one another, on occasion, with humour,kindness and fellow-feeling.

Or am i just naive?

[woodie]

had a very fun mothers day at locale they did a great job and all the children made it difficuilt for the staff as we let them do what they want and just enjoyed ourselves. I was thinking how relaxed it can be round here. Ended up at the fht slaughtered watching fargo. ha bizarre but good!

[annaj]

northlondoner, that is, I think, the nicest thing you've ever posted.

I'm of the opinion that East Dulwich is none of the things that people judge it to be (pretentious, class divided, posh, common, smug, shit, great etc) but just lots of people making the best of what they have. And mostly, hopefully, that includes reaching out and being kind to one another. It certainly does to me.

[bon3yard]

Strangely I find myself touched by these simple but increasingly less frequent diplays of bonhomie. I tend to think that we're all in this together and that a little consideration goes a long way and highlights humanities less spoken about benign nature...then again it could be the several pints of Martini I've drunk tonight in honour of Shane MacGowan speaking.

[ruffers]

northlondoner Wrote:

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> Or am i just naive?

If you are I must be even more so as I think what happened there would happen in most places. It's just easier to moan when something, anything, happens which gives the excuse to do so.

[citizenED]

Glad to hear of your experience Northlondoner. I think ED has a pleasant friendly vibe and am therefore often piqued by the seemingly relntless threads that start off "I was the victim of appalling customer service in suchandsuch cafe and am outraged blah, blah....." Thanks for redressing the balance a little. For the record I went for Mother's Day dinner at the Plough - lovely atmosphere in there too.

[Louisa]

My parents came round for a home cooked meal as my father was too ill to go to a restaurant in the end, so spent this morning running around Sainsburys buying bits. I'm glad your experience at the Bishop was good... btw how was the food?

Louisa.

[northlondoner]

L, food was very good. Took a bit of time to come but well worth the wait. Dad's brisket tender and moist, mum's salmon pie really flavoursome and my pork belly delicious. Hope your meal went well and that your folks enjoyed.

[jim_the_chin]

"But rather in the sense of ordinary folk living ordinary lives, reaching out on to one another, on occasion, with humour, kindness and fellow-feeling"

I would say in my experience that 9/10 people are like this really. It is our own fears - and any hype that feeds off that - that causes us to think otherwise.

Mind you, I don't think this when I get on a crowded bus with my toddler.

[Michael Palaeologus]

I (like to) think that, given the opportunity, people will be caring to others; however rampant consumerism can rather stifle this. Perhaps the current economic crisis has made many of us reflect on what really matters in life and what really makes us happy.

[Mamma Mia]

What an uplifting thread. Great start to the week.

[snorky]

It does rather detract from the bleat frenzy of late

You can witness nice things every day of you lok around you, even do them yourself if you can be arsed

Start today - when you leave your house, pick up that greasy chicken box from the pavement outsider your gate and stick in the nearest bin - take ownerwship of where you live

[Carl]

Kindness - an underrated virtue.

[NunheadGirl]

I truly believe there are more good people than bad out there, and I love this part of South London because there is such an eclectic mix, but we do all seem to muck in together fairly successfully most of the time. After 12 years here I have so many friends and a wonderful support network that would make it hard to move away.

I have experienced many acts of kindness - without fail I am helped with my buggy when trying to make it up and down stairs at the train stations, or when with my 80 year old Mum and in need of help with her suitcase etc. The other week I was in Morrisons in Peckham struggling to pack my shopping with my newborn and the man from the next queue came across and packed all my shopping and loaded it into the trolley for me. I couldn't thank him enough.

Having said that, I get furious when I see people dropping litter and have been known to 'wade in and have a go more than once' because I don't see why we should all just turn our heads and let people get away with stuff like this. I usually pick up said piece of litter and say something like "I'll just put this in the bin shall I as you can't be bothered to". Equally as a conscientious dog owner (not wishing to kick off a huge dog/poop scooping thread again) if I see someone not picking up after their dog I walk up to them with a nappy sack and say "Excuse me, I don't think you noticed but your dog just went to the toilet over there, do you need a bag or have you got your own?".

North London - I'm glad you've 'seen the light' and come to appreciate the merits of life South of the river!

Nunhead Girl.

[TheNewMrsH]

I agree with you Nunhead girl, there are many great people out there and if we all did our "bit" what a great place we would have.

I have to disagree on the "wade in and have a go" Whilst I believe that we should all take pride in where we live, in the age that we live in now, you are taking a great risk by doing so. I used to do exactly the same thing until one such occassion where I was threatened with violence. Since then, I make sure that my family and I do the best that we can and whilst it is extremely infuriating that there are people who do not care about our community, I am not willing to put my life at risk by asking them to be more considerate.

[NunheadGirl]

Well yes, I can understand that completely and don't blame you for being careful. I hate the fact that teenagers can at times feel so intimidating, and certainly when pregnant I steer well clear of any conflict.

[Tony.London Suburbs]

Carl Wrote:

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> Kindness - an underrated virtue.

Indeed. Reminded me of a charming Irish Punter that I used to do Business with 5 years ago.

He used to regularly say "Tony, please don't take my kindness as a weakness!"...

Lovely Guy.

"Knocked" me for ?600 and did a Runner....