Jump to content

Recommended Posts

Heres something I thought was funny although not a chatup line.


You find a top heavy woman at the pub, and you say "I bet you a quid I can make your boobs wobble without touching them", when they agree give them a quick fondle and handover the quid, great innit. It's even worth getting a slap for.

A mate of mine used to fancy a girl at work but she never spoke as she walked past his desk every day. Until, that is, the day she passed and he made a noise of a whip being cracked. No words, just that noise. Amazingly, it did the trick - they started a very intense, passionate relationship.

HellNoHellYeah Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> I think men often underestimate how effective a

> simple "hi" can be. "Clever" chatup lines just

> reek of trying too hard.


I agree, I have found that simply asking if I can buy a drink or something equally bland is usually the best policy.


It worked for me with the wife.

I'm not convinced chat-up lines of this type actually exist in real life other than in 'my mate says' pub-talk. Excluding nightclubs with carpets and possibly anywhere north of Watford, naturally.


Even I've got a few 'my mate says' anecdotes, but I guarantee they never have. They were too busy perspiring with fear and breathing on their hands to check their breath in the bogs to risk making a tit of themselves by laying some cheesy old line on someone who'd laugh in their face.

charliecharlie Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> the one's that have worked on me are pretty

> simple

> "you've got a lovely smile"

> "hey, can I help you with that"

> "my name's ....., what's yours?"

> "Hello"

> etc...

> the cornier the chat up line the faster I run....


And what about "Hello, I'm a well-known designer", eh Charlies?

I just got chatted up by a group of young Dutch ladies while in the park on my lunch break.


The line (and I shit you not on this) was, ?Hello sir*. My friends and I are visiting from the Netherlands. We didn?t realise that there were any cute Englishmen.?


Anyway it was a nice little confidence boost. I feel well up myself now.


*I liked that bit.

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Latest Discussions

    • It didn't occur to me to ask. No idea if dieticians are employed within the NHS. It is just one line of enquiry among others. The GP mentioned it, not me.
    • I thought the most they sell in terms of hot food at londis is like pastries and sausage rolls and for hot drinks its like costa coffee but its always a convenience store. Doesn’t look too bad in my opinion considering that shop has been closed down ever since i moved here
    • Hi Busterb, Yesterday I turned up with a scanner & towels, hoping to take a deceased tabby down to TNV. The body was moved moments before arrival & had not been turned in to any vets, rescues or animal hospitals. I am wondering if this could have been the same cat & if someone just tried to move the tabby further away from the road. Please be warned, viewers discretion is advised. but this is what the deceased tabby looked like: https://www.facebook.com/groups/900015513463302/permalink/3729980853800073/  In any case, if you haven't been able to get someone to scan or take down to a vet, I can scan tomorrow morning.
Home
Events
Sign In

Sign In



Or sign in with one of these services

Search
×
    Search In
×
×
  • Create New...