Magic White Dog Turd....

[ratty]

There is a magic white dog turd on St Francis Ave if anyone is interested. Legend says that if smoked these rare dog turds can have healing powers!

[daizie]

i reckon a poodle did it

[bigbadwolf]

I think the last time I saw an Albino hound cable was circa 1991-92 outside my primary school and it truly was a momentous discovery. I saw a shooting star that day as well.

[ratty]

I think the council should fence it off and people should come from far and wide!

[bigbadwolf]

Although some may think that Ratty has started a rather juvenile, if not base, thread on the subject of the phenomenal re occurance of the extinct we must examine this with the utmost professionalism and sensitivity.

For those of us who were lucky enough to be around during the hay day of the white dog turd during the 70's and 80's it certainly was a mixed bag of emotions on discovery of this unearthly digested matter.

Now over the years I've made it a personal mission to get to the bottom (applaud the pun) of this mystery and I'm happy to say my research has uncovered sound evidence. During the decades that style abandoned it wasn't uncommon for butchers and householders alike to toss mans best friend a bone. Bones contain Calcium which for a dog isn't easy to digest, ask Woof he'll tell you. This resulted in the turd to retain a white texture. Now we've got the science out of the way lets address the reason it was so hard.

Before the Labour government was elected into power it was perfectly acceptable to abandon any 'gift' your dog had left on the public highway. Once deposited the turd was then left to bake in the sun (remember, white turds were only found during the hottest months). The only way for scientists to determine how old the piece of turd was was to cut it open and count the rings, exactly like a tree.

Although white dog turds were in effect harmless it never stopped people acting as though they'd disturbed/set off an anti personnel mine once they'd gone over one with a lawnmower as it would result in tiny pieces of dust and white shrapnel flying all over the shop.

Source. Academic journal of the A.A.A.S (1986).

[daizie]

cant you put some thing over it to preserve it, like a takeaway box

[bigbadwolf]

Or take it home in a 'doggie bag'.

[ratty]

I last saw one c. 1997 in Camberwell, so this is a real find!

Might go and get it and pop it in my freezer! Some of it has already gone dusty!

[daizie]

so its round to yours for tea? no, thats wrong, round to yours for viewing lol

[bigbadwolf]

Are you sure Banksy didn't leave it there. You know, some kind of abstract protest/symbolism of how the area used to be.

[daizie]

you might forget and think its an ice pop if you put it in the freezer

[ratty]

I am just off for a swim but I might take a piccy later.:)

[skidmarks]

Quite a find!

Poor dog the owners must be feeding it the cheapest food. It was down to the ash content of the food. My princess has high quality feed and her dog eggs are text book.

[JetSetWilly]

what is textbook, would it be a rich chestnut colour, with the egg, gently curling on itself before finishing off in a tapered peak.

[skidmarks]

JetSetWilly Wrote:

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> what is textbook, would it be a rich chestnut

> colour, with the egg, gently curling on itself

> before finishing off in a tapered peak.

Its the kind of richard the third that is perfect and takes only minimal wiping; one up, one down and one to polish.

[HonaloochieB]

I've always wondered what being in a Viz staff meeting was like.

[Muley]

Really? There was also one on Crystal Palace Rd, near junction of Whatley Rd, yesterday morning- thought I was having a flashback to the 'olden days'.

[ratty]

If only!

[Muley]

Another sighting yesterday on CP Rd, on the way to Goose Green with the kids. This revived a recent conversation with my five year old about what things were like in the 'olden days' (ie. the 60's) when Daddy was little...

When I was little all dog poo was white ("Really?")

Yes there were computers then, but they were so big that one would fill a whole room ("Is that true?")

There were only three TV channels and we didn't have Cbeebies ("Is that really true Daddy?")

But we did have Thunderbirds and Captain Scarlett on TV ("no Daddy, they're on TV now so you couldn't have had them")

I never flew in an aeroplane until I was 14 years old ("Daddy,that's just silly, how did you go on holiday?")

And we never had broccoli when I was little. I think it was only invented a few years ago ("I'm going to ask Mummy")

[ratty]

Just seen another one this morning. South Side of Chadwick Road, Eastern End!

[bigbadwolf]

Well spotted Ratty. Did it have that crusty 'been around' quality or was it a fresh lay?

[ratty]

Certainly think it had been around for a day or two. Was well chuffed, was gonna walk down Choumert but changed my mind at the last moment! Sadly did not have a phone to take a pic with!

[HonaloochieB]

ratty Wrote:

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> Sadly did not have a phone to take a pic with!

Yes, quite the pity that.

[Mick Mac]

Have you had much luck since you smoked the first one ratty?

[ratty]

Mick Mac Wrote:

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> Have you had much luck since you smoked the first

> one ratty?

Fooking tons moosh!