Wanted: Vigilantes

[Horsebox]

ITS TIME WE (AND BY WE 'I' MEAN 'YOU' AND 'ME') ,LAW ABIDING, HARD WORKING, TAX PAYING, FURIOUS RAGING, CRIME FEARING, CHURCH (OR MOSQUE/SYNAGOGUE/OR THE SIKH ONE)GOING, FUDGE PACKING CITIZENS OF EAST DULWICH DID SOMETHING ABOUT THE CRIME WAVE THAT AT THIS VERY MOMENT AS I TYPE THESE VERY WORDS LITERALLY SWEEPING THROUGH THE AREA.

I PROPOSE A MEETING, YES A MEETING, OF MINDS AND PITCHFORKS SO THAT WE CAN UNITE AND MOBILISE AGAINST THE CRIMINALS AND PONDLIFE SCUMBAGS THAT PERPETRATE THE OFFENCES THAT THREATEN THE VERY CORE OF ALL THAT IS GOOD ABOUT SOCIETY.

WE SHALL TAKE BACK OUR STREETS AND OUR PLAYGROUNDS ONCE AND FOR ALL!

I NEED A SHOW OF HANDS BEFORE I CAN BOOK A SUITABLE VENUE BUT PERHAPS THE IRISH CENTRE ON LORDSHIP LANE WOULD DO?

THANKS IN ANTICIPATION.

p.s. does anybody have a tea-urn that they could bring to the first one? I can supply the teabags...

[The Joker]

I wonder if my arch-enemy will turn up....

[Brendan]

Well as 80% or more of the population of East Dulwich are clearly criminals why don?t we all do our bit by just smacking at least one person at random everyday?

That?ll learn ?em. I?m starting this afternoon.

[Ted Max]

Always with the smacking, Brendan. Would you benefit from a session with our welfare officer? She's got goldfish in her room, chairs like they have in the staff room, and an old TV and VHS video player that is never turned on.

[Brendan]

.

[Brendan]

And that's the last I'll say on it.

[????]

I always have my torch and pitchfork by the door

[bignumber5]

literally sweeping through the area?

At least if we're going to get mugged it's going to be on a well maintained street. How Robin Hood of them to be so public spirited.

[ratty]

I've just smacked meself one for having illegal thoughts!

[Horsebox]

???? Wrote:

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> I always have my torch and pitchfork by the door

Quids, you're hired. Take late shift clown detail.

[Tony.London Suburbs]

Does anti-social behaviour count?

Returned to my beloved Inner Sarf London yesterday.

Merrily eating a Chicken Burger and Chips, a couple of other "patrons" and in walked 2 x 17-year-olds.

Obviously these 2 luvverly Ladeez had "previous" as they knew there was a 10 Foot Mirror there and out came all the make-up accessories, mousse, relaxer ( I think) all the whole kaboodle. Then the "highlight" out came the hair spray and Body spray!

After a few well-aimed swishes they packed their items together and flounced off into the sunset, without a backward glance.

Superb.:'(

p.s. I forgot, the little Darlings combed their long-ish hair, as well, for that final extra touch,

Class.

[Muley]

Horsebox Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> ???? Wrote:

> --------------------------------------------------

> -----

> > I always have my torch and pitchfork by the

> door

>

> Quids, you're hired. Take late shift clown detail.

Not just clowns- essential kit for baying mobs in pursuit vampires/monsters/golems/short-changing Somerfields till staff, etc. across the rooftops of EDs Gothic quarter, wouldn't you say?

[louisiana]

So that wouldn't be Love Vigilantes, eh, Horsebox? :-S

[HonaloochieB]

I'll join but only if it's a posse. And only if I get the chestnut mare. And the Colt Peacemaker.

Also the visit to Miss Kitty's whorehouse should be considerewd a deal breaker.

[MrBen]

I have a BB gun that fires plastic .22 balls that can sting at 3 feet. Normally used for cats crapping on my vegetable patch.

[Horsebox]

Muley Wrote:

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> short-changing Somerfields till staff, (6) MAKES MY BLOOD BOIL!

HB, I'm all about Miss Kitty's whorehouse. You're hired on whatever terms you care to draw up.

MrBen, bring the pain. I'm pushing for a strict anti-cat stance.

Louisiana, no, it's not. I'm just trying to bring a little order back to the neighbourhood,

not install a New World Order :-$

[LegalEagle-ish]

I've had a really stressful week, can I join? I feel the need to give someone a good kicking.

[bigbadwolf]

MrBen Wrote:

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> I have a BB gun that fires plastic .22 balls that

> can sting at 3 feet. Normally used for cats

> crapping on my vegetable patch.

Is this some kind of infantile bravado MrBen? If you're going to do a job do it properly.....I've got a crossbow that could turn a cat inside out at 10 feet.

[LegalEagle-ish]

Why would anyone want to ahoot someone? I would have thought that using a baseball bat or steel toe capped boots would be more satisfying - at least you'd get a workout.

[bigbadwolf]

The Xbow I've got Legal has got so much clout that removing the bolt/arrow would be a workout in itself, especially if you got them in the knee cap or the head.

[LegalEagle-ish]

Ok, so you like to retrieve the bolts afterwards - I suppose that would give a small amount of satisfaction.

[Brendan]

bigbadwolf Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> MrBen Wrote:

> --------------------------------------------------

> -----

> > I have a BB gun that fires plastic .22 balls

> that

> > can sting at 3 feet. Normally used for cats

> > crapping on my vegetable patch.

>

>

> Is this some kind of infantile bravado MrBen? If

> you're going to do a job do it properly.....I've

> got a crossbow that could turn a cat inside out at

> 10 feet.

Well while our cocks are on the table, I?ve got a snide turn of phrase that can annoy in just 30 characters.

[bigbadwolf]

Go on Brendan, fire away.

[Tony.London Suburbs]

Is Brendan's appendage still on the table?

[woofmarkthedog]

I've got a lovely hand bag and a killer pair of heels.....

W**F

*inserts brick....I said "BRICK" ......naughty boy...*