Peckhamgatecrasher

That's anti-semetism rather than racism. On a serious note, the saddest thing I ever witnessed was about 20 years ago on the terraces when the more moronic element of fans made 'monkey noises' whenever a particular opposition player had the ball. The irony was, one of our best players at the time was a young black chap; even more poignant was that a lad (about 12) of mixed race heritage was joining in the chanting.

I don't want your dinosaurs comin' round 'ere.

That's why protests never happen on a Monday.

I wasn't aware we had lost a word. Maybe I'm a bit biased.

Why does Santa have three allotments? So he can hoe, hoe, hoe.

Citizen Ed - don't you know there's a recession on? Make your own.

Could I interest you in a cat that is currently sprawled on my sofa, Moos?

The Mystery of the Missing Thread. I'll probably be there with my magnifying glass.

What is a language snob? Think that's you and me, kid.

Steady on D_C - if you wear tweeds you have to talk the lingo.

Hole spilling? I thought no-one born after 1970 was cognisant with the great Maestro Cribbins.

I think the Duck is enjoying the respite. What is it about your animals?

You'll have to give up bacon sarnies, Jah.

There, there.

I believe I'm in love with JimmyD.

I've heard there are things past Watford.

Not mutually exclusive - just requires a little organisation.

NO!

That's easy - stretch marks, saggy bits & bobs, & stress incontinence.

Mrs Moos. Shame on you - you should not be perusing a thread about single males. Three brer rabbits.

The International Cricket Council have confirmed that a series of amendments to playing conditions are to take effect. ... Additionally, all catches can now be referred to the third umpire when the on-field officials are unsure as to the validity of an appeal. I quite like watching slow action replays and even waiting for third umpire decisions, but I can't help feeling we are moving away from the human element - bad/good umpiring decisions are part of the fun. What do you think?

Quite right, Brendan. Keep Johnny Foreigner guessing.

Don't get me started on black hairs. Walk down Blenheim Grove, etc, etc.

A slap and a kick for being so quick. [No returns is as meaningless as fainites]

I think Ted Max is right - why change a perfectly good name? Marion is really quite fetching.