*opens door slowly, it creaks loudly, brushes aside cobwebs in darkness, lights match, finds oil lamp, lights and looks around at dusty, musty room. Suddenly notices pair of Churches' brogues,soles upwards (hole in left) attached to legs - the rest hidden under July 19th edition of Telegraph. Kicks right one. Come on Micheal get 'em in....thank god summer's on its knees