legalbeagle

From patriotic flag waving to high heeled bottom spanking in two pages. Now if that's not proper British I don't know what is.

I prefer "Fembot" if you don't mind HAL. Groovy baby.

The Wiktionary defines legalbeagle as: "A skilful and adroit attorney". I rest my case.

I shall march in my very best glittery Stuart Weitzman's. Will the medical corps be attending?

I think it is fair to say that this is exactly how the forum will treat any newcomers who are as peculiarly, erm, forthright as you are. You are more than welcome to apologise for misjudging the tone of this forum and being very offensive, and I think Ladymuck was very gracious to accept so quickly. But just as you claim the right to speak so frankly, others have the right to find your apology insincere or simply inadequate. No one on here asked for a superhero, Axeman, and no one elected you to the post of chief whip. So don't be surprised that you aren't getting a warm welcome. (Yes Brum sweetie, I know. Sorry.)

Axeman Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > I'm not commenting on any charitable effort. I'm > commenting the pitiful nature of this thread. > Which appears to be a by proxy plea for attention > on behalf of someone who, judging by the erratic > and incomprehensible posts, clearly has learning > difficulties. > > Oh, and this raffle is a bit false seeing as the > prize goes to whoever the organizer likes the > most. But I imagine you all know this, but don't > want to say it, to avoid shattering the > transparent illusion of goodwill towards people > you've never met. > > How pathetic. Who's that trip trapping over my bridge........

Well it's a judgement call really isn't it. A simple "OFFS, what a knob" will often suffice and is very effective (see ???? on another Axeman thread re "creches" for a fine example) but here I think your nod to observational humour was indeed apt. A very funny. Bravo that woman. And behave yourself Axe. Swinging at her Ladyships good deeds is just not nice.

dita-on-tees Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Perhaps in Axeman we have finally found the > missing link between modern humans with a sense of > charity and kindness and thoughtless neanderthal > men with an awareness of fire and meat... Thanks DOT, you put very eloquently what I was thinking. Saves me feeding the Troll. > St Christopher's is an amazing charity and the > help and support offered by hospices to families > in terrible times is amazing. > > Well done Woof! Hear hear! Good mutt. And good on you m'Lady for increasing the cash flows.

RosieH Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Christ I'm depressed. Run for parliament! Politicians are only terrible cos no one else wants to do it!

I third the "cheap fridge in his room" suggestion, cos the list of suspects is tooooo long. Chief suspect for raiding my fridge was our librarian - she was SO huge her nickname was Conan the Librarian. I don't think I ever saw her with motionless jaws.

"all you very busy yummy mummys doing lunch" ? All badly behaved children belong to attractive women married to rich men who are too busy chatting to others of their like to discipline their kids? I think more people would be less rude if you expressed an opinion rather than a prejudice.

I second Heber Jumble Queen's comments. I would like to take my kids swimming to my local pool during the week but it looks ike i'll still be driving them to Beckenham Spa rather than walking them to their local pool. Shame because other than that it looks/sounds like a fantastic job!

I was once told, in all seriousness, that hemlines are a leading indicator of economic conditions. Any fashionistas out there who can tell us whether skirts are long or short this season?

Oh shame! Go on, get me to defend you. I'd do a real good job! (I wouldn't deliberately foul it up so you got in trouble or anything. Honest I wouldn't.)

Tarot Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > I dont think you.ll ever make it to the bar, legal > eagle. That's quite right Tarot cos I'm a solicitor not a barrister. But I do own a bar. Maybe that's what confused you? I OWN a bar, but I haven't been CALLED to the bar. (See what I did there?)

Tarot, man, chill out. It's Sunday night - listen to some music, put your feet up, sip a glass of your favourite tipple. You'll give yourself a hernia spoiling for a scrap like that - that's Friday night talk!

I believe in miracles - where ya from?

But the Lion Poo doesn't smell and doesn't stick to your kids wellies and shoes and isn't GROSS and you put it there rather than some LAZY SELFISH PET OWNER who seems to think it is ok for you to shovel up after THEIR pet every bleedin' day! Ahem. Sorry. Rant over. Getting a bit annoyed with my two particularly determined garden invaders. I do like cats really.

Thanks Katie1997, I'm glad you like the place. We don't always get it right, but we do always try!

Thanks Laurlaur. The offer remains open, and if you have some suggestions to improve the vegetarian platter let me know. Feedback, however painful it can sometimes be, is always good to hear!

Ask your neighbour to provide the cat with a litter tray in which it can do its business - it's their cat, I'm not sure why they think it's ok for other people to have to clear up after it? You have my sympathy. I have to clear up after two cats who seem to think my garden is there just for them to poo in!

Laurlaur - I'm one of the owners of G&B and very sorry to hear that you had this experience. We do always try to give a good service and good quality food, and it's always disappointing to hear when that doesn't happen. Please PM me and I'll arrange a refund for the food. I'll understand if you don't want to come back to us, but at the very least I'd prefer you didn't pay for something you are that unhappy about.

Many people find the teachings of the Catholic church deeply offensive. Chacun a son gout, don't you think? I DEFINITELY want a Benedictaphone. I mean who wouldn't find that handy? And it's a key ring too. http://www.find-me-a-gift.co.uk/benedictaphone-talking-pope-keyring.html Bostin! Edited to say I didn't look at the beginning of this thread, cos it's just tooooo long, so didn't know there were already links to memorabilia! So happy. Ordering Benedictaphone right now!

So has anyone bought any of the pope memorabilia? I'd quite like a soap "pope on a rope". Just to remind me what a slippery b*stard he is. Anyone know where I can buy one?

giggirl Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > What a brilliant reply RosieH. Kudos for the > Black Orchid. I can't pull off dark lipstick - I > tried it in for a while but it made me look mean. > My toes are Linkin Park - also dark and delicious. > Otherwise, I'm pure Russian Red. *Dashes off to check out Tom Ford lipstick*