Jah Lush

Odeon

Can't Get Enough - Bad Company

Actually Sean, I just checked and you're way out in front on 7,277 but still a little behind Keef.

Mine hasn't so that'll put me in the lead then.

Really! How oblique do you wanna get? Actually, I prefer Harrods Food Hall even though I've never shopped there. I just like the sound of it.

Oh thanks. Great video. Here's something completely different and an absolutele classic from a very much overlooked artist. A great singer/songwriter who was covered by the Beatles and the Stones. Arthur Alexander - Anna

LISTENING TO STING MAKES WINE TASTE LIKE TRAMP?S PISS LISTENING to any record by Sting while drinking wine will make even the finest vintage taste like rancid tramp's urine, research reveals. 'Ten Summoner's Tales' can absolutely ruin a bottle of Cloudy Bay. Study author Professor Henry Brubaker said the taste varied according to the song, with Roxanne leaving behind the delicate flavour of a young runaway after two nights in a cardboard box next to the Royal Festival Hall. However, listening to Sting's recent album of lute tunes Songs from the Labyrinth made a Petrus '61 taste like the distilled micturation of a homeless Glaswegian alcoholic who had been marinated for ten years in his own vomit. Professor Brubaker said: "In laboratory tests we gave one subject a Chateau Margaux '78 and then put on The Dream of the Blue Turtles. He was sick on my shoes. "We then gave another subject a nice glass of zingy Cloudy Bay sauvignon blanc, started playing De Do Do Do, De Da Da Da and by the chorus she had pulled out her own tongue and ripped her ears off. "We were going to repeat the experiment using Chris de Burgh's Lady in Red but my ethics committee intervened. I don?t want to go to jail for manslaughter." The professor added: "At first we thought the cause might be some previously undiscovered link between the fungiform papillae taste buds and the Eustachian tube of the ear. But then someone pointed out that Sting's music is just a lot of pish."

Depends what you're asking.

Fabregas was on a one match ban against Man City but I think it's possible that Barcelona or Real Madrid would beckon at the end of the season if the Arse continue to win feck all.

The Ascent of Rum Doodle by W.E. Bowman. A very funny spoof of a mountaineering expedition.

Oh dear oh dear. It just gets worse for the Arse doesn't it. Another poor display and another loss. Well played City. Three-nil and it could have been a lot more. He might still be young but I'd give the Arsenal captaincy to Cesc Fabregas. He's the best player at the club by a mile and will immediately gain the respect of his fellow players. He's pure class. Gallas has been a disaster as a Captain and I don't think he's been quite the same player he was when he was at Chelsea, but he has always been a moaner and I think it was very poor choice by Wenger to to make him captain in the first place. Anyway what do I care. Come on you Spurs!

Whaddya mean young(ish)? Wags finger at Steph. A very happy birthday to you young Asset. Lots of luuuurve. x x x

And amen to that. I am still in recovery mode and wondering whether I'll recover from lastnightitis.

No problem dear boy. I'm a huge fan of the Faces (they start rehearsals on Monday for a tour next year) and here's another song written by the late great Ronnie Lane from the same album. Last Orders Please - The Faces.

Well, that is some consolation Quids, at least the Gooners lost as well. As for Spurs we've still got a very long way to go before we are out of the relegation mire and start moving up the table.

Dear Santa, Can I have a new goalkeeper for Christmas? Lots of love, Harry Redknapp

The only one I could find of Claire Foy.

Good grief! You really should get out more Huguenot or you'll wind up looking like an old tomato. Last night tonight.

I don't mind a Bloody Mary but that's a fruit based drink is it not? Yeah! Get yer arse down there.

Well put Huguenot. I had a friend at school whose mother was among many who were blown to bits at Aldershot barracks by an IRA bomb. Terrorism is what it is no matter who perpetrates it.

Not a chance. Veggie juice is disgusting.

What way?

As far as I know it's going to be a juice bar but I could be wrong.

I prefer to think that I'm Keith to his Mick.

Definitely the last night tomorrow. Got it from the horse's mouth. The fruit and veg shop nextdoor has bought it and Dave is handing the keys over on Monday. I'll certainly miss the old girl.