Jah Lush

Good grief!!!! Eleven quid for a Zombie. I've not drunk cocktails in years but eleven bleeding quid!!!!!! Ye Gods. I once drank ten of them in one night with the odd lager on the side. I think I'd be bankrupt very quickly if I was to try that now.

Good afternoon Solo-K. Where's Bar Story? Is it any good?

Well said Ratty. I can't imagine what it's going to be like to sit in a pub without having a ciggy with my beer. One cannot go without the other. It's like having bacon without the eggs. It's also years since I've been in the Grove Tavern, as it was then. And, yes they completely f****d it up.

Have seen him in the Dog a few times. Also seen Kelly Brook in there too when she was still with Jason Statham, who is still a bit of a regular and Timothy Spall too who I've spotted in quite a few watering holes around Dulwich.

Yeah, the Dog is great for Sunday lunch but my only complaint is that it gets too crowded on Sunday lunchtimes with out-of-towners having a day trip to the Village.

Mary Clancy goes up to Father O'Grady after his Sunday morning service, and she's in tears. He says: "So what's bothering you, Mary my dear?" "Oh, Father," she says: "I've got terrible news. My husband passed away last night." The priest says: "Oh, Mary, that's terrible. Tell me, did he have any last requests?" She says: "That he did, Father." The priest says: "What did he ask, Mary?" "He said, `Mary, put down the gun!"

Err, I think we've covered that in another thread. See "Is East Dulwich becoming too posh."

That's true. We could certainly do with decent a family run Italian restaurant on Lordship Lane. Something like Lorenzo's up in Crystal Palace which is very good and not too expensive.

Ah! A man of taste. Excellent. Why change a good look? I'm hardly a dandy but I know what I like.

Mr Dale, you must be new to the area. The Crown & Greyhound in Dulwich Village is commonly known as the Dog by us locals.

I was lucky enough to see the darling that is Keith Richards last summer in the south of France and I have to say he looked marvellous. That's a face that's lived a life, raddled certainly but bloody marvellous for it. Anyway, this spring I er shall mostly be wearing what I usually damned well wear, that being jeans, tee-shirt, Jesus sneakers, shades and a drink in one hand and a fag in the other. Cheers! :)-D

It's very difficult to not get a good curry on Lordship Lane. As there are seven curry houses on the street, the standard and quality of food and service is very high as obviously there is a lot of competition. This link is making me hungry. I may well be going for a Ruby tonight and will wash it all down with lashings of Cobra. Marvellous!:)-D

Take That have split up again. Sorry, only kidding Dulwich Mum.

I love a Ruby and the Coriander is the only Indian restaurant on Lordship Lane I haven't tried yet. Must rectify this soon. Thanks for the tip. Still think the Surma is the best though.

Well said Kathryn. The last thing East Dulwich needs is a Starbucks. It's bad enough having a Cafe Nero on Lordship Lane. What next Macdonalds? Aaargh!

A mortician was working late one night. It was his job to examine the dead bodies before they were sent off to be buried or cremated. As he examined the body of Mr Schwartz, who was about to be cremated, he made an amazing discovery. Schwartz had the longest penis he had ever seen. "I'm sorry Mr Schwarz," said the mortician, "but I can't send you off to be cremated with a huge penis like that. It has to be saved for posterity." With that the coroner used his tools to remove the dead man's hugeness. He stuffed it into his briefcase and took it home. The first person he showed it to was his wife. "I have something to show to you that you won't believe," he said, and opened the briefcase. "Oh my God!" the wife screamed, "Schwartz is dead!"

Yawn............zzzzzzzzzz...wake me up when you've finished.

An old cowboy went to a bar and ordered a drink. As he sat there sipping whiskey, a young lady sat down next to him. She turned and asked: "Are you a real cowboy?" He replied: "Well, I've spent my whole life on the ranch, herding cows, breaking horses, mending fences, so I guess I am." He then asked her what she was. She replied: "I'm a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking about women. As soon as I get up in the morning I think of women, when I eat, shower, watch TV, everything seems to make me think of women." A little while later a couple sat down next to the old cowboy and asked him: "Are you a real cowboy?" He replied: "I always thought I was, but I just found out I'm a lesbian."

Paddy Murphy limps into a Belfast pub looking as if he'd just been run over by a train. His arm in a sling, his nose is broken and his face is cut and bruised. "What happened to you?" asks Sean, the barman. "Jamie O'Connor and me had a fight," says Paddy. "That little swine, O'Connor," says Sean, "he couldn't do that to you, he must have had something in his hand?" "That he did," says Paddy, "a shovel is what he had, and a terrible lickin' he gave me with it." "Well," says Sean, "you should have defended yourself. Didn't you have something in your hand?" "That I did," said Paddy. "Mrs O'Connor's breast, and a thing of beauty it was, but useless in a fight."

Point taken. I'm outta here to get outta my head.

ED really would be a posh place if we all spoke like the Queen. Would you have us all walking around with old fashioned plummy BBC voices Keef? What about estuary English is that good enough for you?

Too southern!!!! Well it is south London what do you expect.

Yeah, I've seen the Rodster lookalike walking up Underhill Road on many occasion over the years. I must congratulate him on his barnet. Just having hair at his age is a minor miracle.

Good point with that conundrum. Front room, back room, sitting room, it amounts to the same thing.

I always thought a lounge was a posh word for a living room. Maybe it's the forum that's posh.