Jump to content

Recommended Posts

Passes urgent note to Ms Polly Dorner:


"Never buy any other wedding magazine - only Martha Stewart Weddings from WH Smith in Victoria - you will see why when you buy it, please????"


Smiles to self as remembers organising great roller coaster of a wedding extravaganza in only six months.


Sobers up suddenly at thought of organising a fabulous party...

*comes in to relax after being annoyed by the forum falling over*

*walks behind folded japanese screen, walks out wearing orange double-breasted terrycloth bathrobe similar to the one Steve McQueen was wearing in The Thomas Crown Affair on TV last night*

*picks up a glass of Polly's wine, nods in appreciation and slides into filled hot tub with added relaxing bath oils*

Steps out from behind folded Japanese screen wearing white Calvin Klein Bikini and red nail polish.


Removes large white rimmed Stella McCartney sunglasses and places on card table next to chums.


Runs fingers through long glossy (currently dark and certainly never a hint of red) hair.


Smiles and accepts cold glass of iced water from Ana the au pair, slides into hot tub in demure manner.


Sighs and breaths aroma of relaxing bath oils deeply.

*emerges from a point in time-space with a pop and resumes customary bodily proportions*

*discovers own right hand to be occupied by something*

*invesigates further and is relieved to find it is a chilled glass of white wine*

*investigates further*

*finds said investigation pleasant and relaxing*

*continues*

*hears the schoolboy-like giggling in the background and guesses it's Keef sniggering about DM entering the hottub in her bikini*

*smiles as he remembers his sunglasses are really dark and allows eyes to look where ever they want without being caught*

*smiles to DM and hands her a glass of Polly's finest whilst half expecting Keef to dive-bomb into the tub*

Wafts into lounge, realises that the pads from new Cleo facial exercising machine are still stuck to face, rushes behind Japanese screen.


Decides as no-one seems to be here yet, to plug in and give self a further 'lift'.


Hopes no-one is curious of buzzing sound behind screen.

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Latest Discussions

    • I would add that the significantly increased event structure of last year, with trackway everywhere as well as the huge metal barriers, completely changes the feel of the park. I agree with Fishboy that there is a convenient blending of park with the Common, to give the impression that only a small section is used.    I still do not understand why this event cannot be moved wholesale to the Common. It would be closer to transport hubs and all other events seem to take place on the Common.
    • So - after spending weeks lying about everyone else, not to mention yesterday’s disgusting comments about Rob Reiner, Trump is officially suing BBC for 10 billion  the gall of that creature.  And anyone who defends him.  He cares nothing about “truth” Telegraph/guardian/times all reporting 10 billion.   However in bbc  news they are saying 5.  Hmmmmm    
    • Piotr and his team just completed our ensuite and we couldn’t be happier. They were a lovely team to have around and took great care with protection and clean-up every day. Communication was great and there were no nasty surprises with the final invoice despite a few challenges with the room along the way. The standard of work is incredible. We still can’t believe this room is in our house!
    • Conservationists would not agree with you
Home
Events
Sign In

Sign In



Or sign in with one of these services

Search
×
    Search In
×
×
  • Create New...