Did you have a great 2nd or subsequent birth?

[reren]

I have a week til due date and am loving really good birth stories! Did you find it was really different 2nd time round - would love to hear about really positive birth stories. Didn't have a great time first time and ive done a lot of preparing this time (hypnobirthing course etc) - would love to hear about people who had long first birth and speedy / positive subsequent birth?!

Only positive stories please!!

[pommie]

second birth was emergency c section after a lot of pleading with one doctor. Wont give you any more details as wasn't really a positive birth story!

[Gooders79]

First was induction as past dates, with assisted delivery, scbu and stay for a few days post delivery. Second spontaneous labour on due date, arrived at hospital at 7:30 examined and 5cm at 8pm, delivered by 8:30 with gas and air. Much much more positive!

[jennyh]

Friend of mine had her second a couple of weeks ago, woke at 3am with no signs, at 4am had first contraction, baby arrived in maternity assessment unit at 5!! Her first labour wasn't great so there is def hope!

I'm due at Christmas so keeping my fingers crossed too!

[verds]

Yes, I had a traumatic first birth and a good second one. I put it down to the lovely man in Kings who gave me an epidural second time round, ha ha.

Also, the Kings midwives spotted how anxious I was at 38 weeks and arranged for me to visit the fabulous woman who runs the whole maternity show (I can't remember her name, but no doubt someone else on here will!) to take me through my birth notes and reassure me.

A lot of people have said the Kings experience is a lot better than it was a few years ago, too.

I spent nearly three years having flashbacks to the first birth, but after the second I never thought of it again.

If you're worried, tell the midwives because there are loads of understanding people at Kings who really can help. Happy to chat if you need it! Good luck - you can do it xxx

[Polly D]

Hi Reren

Labour with my first went on for 24 hrs, I was so exhausted when he actually arrived I couldn't really enjoy the moment any more, subsequently I'd say it took me a while to really bond with him, and to get over the shock, tho I have to say apart from that we were v lucky to have had no real problems.

With no 2 I was determined to prepare myself as much as possible, tho realizing not everything goes to plan! I did some pregnancy yoga which was definitely v helpful in labour. My waters broke at 2am, midwife arrived at 5am, I was 8cm, he was born just after 9am. I fell in love straightaway.

We has the same midwife for both boys, both at home, but my expectations for each labour were probably quite different. Throughout the first labour I remember feeling, and saying, "I can't do this". With the second it was the opposite: "I'm doing this!". This was a great tool I learned from the yoga (with Lindy Lu from the practice on East Dulwich Road).

Good luck!

[HannahSE23]

Reren i have to say that after a traumatic 1st birth i positively enjoyed my second! Had my daughter at home with no pain relief. I just went with what my body was telling me and felt totally in control. She was born after 4 hours and soon after we were tucked up in bed with a cuppa feeling elated. Great experience and I sincerely hope you have one too. Good luck, stay positive and you'll be fine!

[simonethebeaver]

First birth was very, very long - I had painful contractions for four dats. Although it was a home birth and I avoided induction, it wasn't the water birth I'd really wanted, and I had a painful tear. Second time round, I only had about five hours of painful contractions, no pain relief for various reasons (I did really, really WANT gas and air!) and the baby was born in the pool without tearing. From waters breaking to birth was 20 minutes!

[bjm]

Yes.

1st was 40 hours of very hard work.

2nd 9 hours- 4 hours at home- gas and air and a water birth at Kings- it was fast and painful but really lovely and I felt really empowered by the experience.

[reren]

Thank you so much for all the responses - this is great! What would you say your top tips are - did you find focusing / thinking about particular things really helped? I'm feeling confident and hopeful that the experience will be a positive one - just trying to absorb as much as I can about ways that I can prepare for the big day! Keep the great stories coming!

[Norfolkvillas]

My two births couldn't have been more different - first time round, my body just didn't know what to do, therefore induced at 42wks, long labour, waters broken for me, epidural, loads of intervention & stress, eventually an emergency rotational forceps delivery. Second time round, the day after my due date (according to my dates - a week later than the official dates), I went into labour when I woke up on the Sunday morning, managed contractions no probs, went to Kings at lunchtime, 45 mins later my daughter arrived. No pain relief apart from a tens machine - even though I am very much a drugs-and-hospitals girl. I was lucky enough to have wonderful, wonderful midwives both times round, so for me, it was just a question of my body being able to say 'ohhhh, this again!' and know what it was meant to do.

For me, and again it's SUCH a personal thing, my biggest tip in general would be a book called Birth Skills by Juju Sundin, which just really chimed with the cynical, control freak that I am - as it takes a more straightforward approach to pain (yes it will hurt, this is how to deal with that), I'm not sure it's compatible with the hypnobirthing thinking ... it was in fact passed on to me by a fellow forumite who was a hypnobirther and couldn't get on with it - but I will be forever grateful to her for passing it on!

Anyway, good luck!! My midwife told me second time round would be a doddle and I didn't believe her, but it was true!

[JulieP]

My first child was born at home. However it was a very long labour, I was awake for 3, nearly 4 nights. It was painful as she was back to back and contractions were not coming regularly or strongly which delayed things. We were almost at the stage of having to go to hospital when second midwife came and suggested I eat honey to restore my energy levels (the womb cannot contract on empty) and have a lie down and a rest. About 4 hours after this, gave birth to my daughter. Despite getting the longed for home birth, I still found the whole experience extremely traumatic both physically and mentally and was wiped out afterwards.

My second child was born less than 2 years later. I had a set up a store of food to start eating as soon as the first contraction hit. Having a toddler to entertain helped the first stages of labour ? singing wind the bobbin up through twinges helped take my mind odd things! I do remember keep thinking about something from yoga where you relax your jaw? Four hours from the first serious contraction my little boy was born still in his membranes. It was really calm and while not pain free I knew what to expect so could really go with it. I was a really lovely birth

I had a few twinges with my third child in the day leading up to his birth but nothing too serious or regular. Then he was born in 10 minutes, delivered by my husband. This was a bit of a shock but also quite empowering.

Each birth quicker and easier and each time the recovery was quicker.

Good luck with the birth, there are lots of good stories out there to give you confidence.

[sanity girl]

Hi,

yes I had the birth I had always hoped for with my second. First was born in Italy, v medicalised, waters broken, v strong contractions from then on, walking epidural and episiotomy - not horrendous, was only 6 hours from established labour until birth, but not what I wanted. Second birth was at Kings with lovely midwife and student midwife - four hours from when I got into labour room until birth, just gas and air, they were so thoughtful straight after the birth - dimmed lights, baby straight on boob, no weighing etc until after he had fed, it was just lovely. And the student midwife stayed on after, ran me a bath and settled baby to sleep while I had a good soak. Baby born at 4am, they let me stay in the same room resting with baby until the next day, I went home at 2pm in the afternoon.

Hope you get the positive experience you are hoping for.

[Kaska]

First one 3 long days,very bad experience...

Second time just over half an hour from examined-4 cm to see my lo...no gas and air as midvife wasn't ready yet...She kept saying:how come? 4 hours later we were back home.

Good Luck!

[EmilyPie]

1st birth was a bit grim: waters broken as baby in distress; immediately into very intense and painful contractions; whole thing took ages with lots of monitoring and baby's heart rate dropping, all quite scary, and followed by a balls up on the stitching up which took over an hour and which they had to unpick and re do. Second time much better. 3 1/2 hours from waking up with contractions to baby arriving, all very straight forward with manageable pain despite no time for pain relief (I don't like gas and air). My husband was back home before our little boy woke up so he wasn't disturbed at all. All very positive, as these things go. Good luck!

[DenmotherSmith]

I can remember being desperate for 'good' birth stories after the long traumatic birth of my first child. I was a little young (23), a little naive about the hospital birth experience, and had a long labour I really did not feel in control of. Two years later number 2 was the most perfect at home delivery I could of dreamed of, 4 hours of calm where I really felt in control of my body. So good in fact that number three appeared two years later and then number four! Sometimes think if I hadn't had such lovely empowering labours might not have got all the way to number four!

[kmoon249]

use your experience to be prepared ( music, food, drink etc), stay calm and read the signs your body is telling you. i was attached to my birthing ball for no 1 and fully expected the same for no 2 but contractions were way worse witting on the ball. the most comfortable position was on my hands and knees. My advice would be to keep it moving and find positions you are comfortable with. i'm shocked how different my contractions felt in different positions. Also the gas and air worked much better for no 2. i think because i was more relaxed and took it properly. ie at the very start of the contraction - long deep breathe. if you get one timed right and can feel the effect you are on you way to a happier experience.

Best of luck.

[Trish]

First time round wasn't pleasant. Second time was a truly beautiful experience. I never felt out of control and never once experienced pain which I could bear, although it still took a long time. I wish someone had told me it could be like that the first time around! Agree with focussing on your breathing - as long as I was breathing out slowly through a contraction it was bearable. I felt in control. Such a contrast to the first time.

[Anna M]

First time took a LONG LONG time. Second time happened all by itself after I put number one to bed, and DS2 was there in an hour and a half. It was like my body knew what it was doing and just ignored me and got on with it, second time. (First time it was like it was trying to read the manual in Korean.) Good luck, don't worry, enjoy! And Happy Families!!

[kamath]

First time I had an awful birth (wont go into detail) . BUT second time I had a home birth a 1 hour labour and wonderful midwife it was lovely experience. I was so scared about giving birth again but the wonderful skilled lanes midwifes ( especially Mary) made me feel relaxed and I felt in safe hand. It can definitely be better second time round.

Good luck and my advice to anyone is to stay calm as best you can x x

[hpsaucey]

reren Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> I have a week til due date and am loving really

> good birth stories! Did you find it was really

> different 2nd time round - would love to hear

> about really positive birth stories. Didn't have

> a great time first time and ive done a lot of

> preparing this time (hypnobirthing course etc) -

> would love to hear about people who had long first

> birth and speedy / positive subsequent birth?!

>

> Only positive stories please!!

Like you a used some hypnobirthing - home CD - and I'd been to pregnancy yoga lessons with the wonderful Ingrid Lewis which prepared me with various positions and breaths etc, and, I'm afraid I was treating the whole thing like a bit of a project as I knew what I DIDN'T want it to be like second time round. The lucky result: 4 hours from start of contractions to birth; no pain relief; baby born very calmly at home in his unruptured amniotic sac! Almost so fast the midwives made it with ten minutes to spare. Like some of the others - soon tucked up in bed with partner and older son and a cup of tea. Thank you Brierley midwives - esp Vanessa! Like Anna M's comments about first time being like reading a manual in another language!

Good luck with your birth!

H

[j-mo]

I had virtually the same experience both times: induced due to waters breaking and then a v medicalised labour. HOWEVER, my reaction to the experience couldn't hAve been more different. I felt relaxed and calm second time round. I think it helped that he arrived in 3 pushes. It was the most amazingly beautiful moment of my life (as opposed to hideous ventouse palaver first time round). I felt much more present than I had done the first time and was actually able to enjoy it. I too benefitted from the Lindy lu "I'm doing it!!!" approach and even used some of her music to give birth to.

I am sure you will be fine. Your body knows what to do, as others have said, and the baby will be out in no time!!

Good luck x

[j-mo]

And hpsaucy, mine arrived in the sac too (turned out full waters hadn't broken after all). What an amazing sight that is. V lucky apparently. He's a very chilled out little chap, maybe cos he was protected from everything until he was out!

[minder]

My third child (now 15) was born "within the caul" (as I was told at the time) and it was amazing to see. She was a lot harder to push out (midwife had to break the membranes halfway) than my first two births but was also born within a few hours of labour like my first two births. I was standing up, as had been at my second child's birth (hanging round husband's neck) and after having my first baby totally unprepared and 4 weeks early.

He was born a few hours after my waters broke and I was strapped down to a monitor in King's. Not a pleasant experience and remember nearly passing out a few times with gasping too much gas and air! If my Mum, sister and husband had not been there I don't know how I would have got through it!

Best wishes.

[minder]

Also, after being worried about another early birth as first was born 4 weeks early, second child was born on her due date and two and a half hours after first contraction. Third child was born a week early and another quick delivery.