Jump to content

Recommended Posts

I went swimming the other day and caught a female fellow swimmer giving me the eye. I checked to make sure nothing was hanging out or that there were no other reasons for her attention, but all was tucked in. I caught her glancing a few more times, but in the end I swam my lengths, got out and went home. I would have taken the opportunity to chat her up but a swimming pool felt like the wrong place to do this. Maybe the 'no petting' warning on the swimming pool walls of my youth have left their mark, though I guess I could be getting a little ahead of myself on that.

Hmmm


Jimmy I can see your problem here, but you could have said to her that you need a Tea/Coffee/Bovril and Packet of Crisps after a swim and did she care to join you?


At which point she may well have told you that your ultra tight white speedos are see through when wet (ultimate put down from my youth) but at least you had tried


Luv

Sadly - the only one I can think of for you Jeremy is


"Do you fancy getting your lips around something really meaty (mid length pause) like a cup of Bovril"


Tillie - I am worried about you, to do that implies it is 'nude night' at the baths....



Jeremy Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> Well at least you now have an incentive to go

> swimming more often. Definitely ask her if she

> fancies a bovril next time, or a game of Double

> Dragon.

>

> Trying to think of an amusing bovril-based

> innuendo...

LuvPeckham Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> Sadly - the only one I can think of for you Jeremy

> is

>

> "Do you fancy getting your lips around something

> really meaty (mid length pause) like a cup of

> Bovril"

>


Ha ha! That was good Peckham.

bigbadwolf Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> LuvPeckham Wrote:

> --------------------------------------------------

> -----

> > Sadly - the only one I can think of for you

> Jeremy

> > is

> >

> > "Do you fancy getting your lips around

> something

> > really meaty (mid length pause) like a cup of

> > Bovril"

> >

>

> Ha ha! That was good Peckham.



Sid the Sexist taught me all I know !!!

Hmmm


If you are looking for examples


How about the policewoman arresting you at the time.... for some reason it doesn't seem get you a better cell for the night


Or your best mate whilst you are comforting her, after she has just split up from her boyfriend of 6 years


Or your girlfriends best mate whilst your girlfriend is asleep in bed in the next room



No Idea why but the last two just failed to get me anywhere !!!

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Latest Discussions

    • There was an excellent discussion on Newscast last night between the BBC Political Editor, the director of the IFS and the director of More In Common - all highly intelligent people with no party political agenda and far more across their briefs than any minister I've seen in years. The consensus was that Labour are so unpopular and untrusted by the electorate already, as are the Conservatives, that breaking the manifesto pledge on income tax wouldn't drive their approval ratings any lower, so they should, and I quote, 'Roll The Dice', hope for the best and see where we are in a couple of years time. As a strategy, i don't know whether I find that quite worrying or just an honest appraisal of what most governments actually do in practice.
    • They are a third of the way through their term Earl. It's no good blaming other people anymore. They only have three years left to fix what is now their own mess. And its not just lies in the manifesto. There were lies at the last budget too, when they said that was it, they weren't coming back for more tax and more borrowing. They'd already blamed the increase in NIC taxes on what they claimed was a thorough investigation. They either knew everything then or they lied about that too .   They need to stop lying and start behaving. If they don't the next government won't be theirs, it will be led by Nigel Farage.  They have to turn it round rapidly. Blaming other people, telling lies and breaking promises isn't going to cut it any more.
    • Is it lame? Or is it Lamey? (sorry)
Home
Events
Sign In

Sign In



Or sign in with one of these services

Search
×
    Search In
×
×
  • Create New...