Jump to content

Recommended Posts

I went swimming the other day and caught a female fellow swimmer giving me the eye. I checked to make sure nothing was hanging out or that there were no other reasons for her attention, but all was tucked in. I caught her glancing a few more times, but in the end I swam my lengths, got out and went home. I would have taken the opportunity to chat her up but a swimming pool felt like the wrong place to do this. Maybe the 'no petting' warning on the swimming pool walls of my youth have left their mark, though I guess I could be getting a little ahead of myself on that.

Hmmm


Jimmy I can see your problem here, but you could have said to her that you need a Tea/Coffee/Bovril and Packet of Crisps after a swim and did she care to join you?


At which point she may well have told you that your ultra tight white speedos are see through when wet (ultimate put down from my youth) but at least you had tried


Luv

Sadly - the only one I can think of for you Jeremy is


"Do you fancy getting your lips around something really meaty (mid length pause) like a cup of Bovril"


Tillie - I am worried about you, to do that implies it is 'nude night' at the baths....



Jeremy Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> Well at least you now have an incentive to go

> swimming more often. Definitely ask her if she

> fancies a bovril next time, or a game of Double

> Dragon.

>

> Trying to think of an amusing bovril-based

> innuendo...

LuvPeckham Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> Sadly - the only one I can think of for you Jeremy

> is

>

> "Do you fancy getting your lips around something

> really meaty (mid length pause) like a cup of

> Bovril"

>


Ha ha! That was good Peckham.

bigbadwolf Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> LuvPeckham Wrote:

> --------------------------------------------------

> -----

> > Sadly - the only one I can think of for you

> Jeremy

> > is

> >

> > "Do you fancy getting your lips around

> something

> > really meaty (mid length pause) like a cup of

> > Bovril"

> >

>

> Ha ha! That was good Peckham.



Sid the Sexist taught me all I know !!!

Hmmm


If you are looking for examples


How about the policewoman arresting you at the time.... for some reason it doesn't seem get you a better cell for the night


Or your best mate whilst you are comforting her, after she has just split up from her boyfriend of 6 years


Or your girlfriends best mate whilst your girlfriend is asleep in bed in the next room



No Idea why but the last two just failed to get me anywhere !!!

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Latest Discussions

    • I would leave London, or at a push move back to north London. In SE London if you want to get away in a car you are trapped, always an hour to go the first 10 miles, chugging up to the M4 or round the south circular, which is really just a line someone drew connecting a load of roads. and I know there are trains but first you have to get to those mainline stations, unless you only want to leave London to go to Kent. which I don't. 
    • It was you who  made it personal in the first place,  Jazzer. You said you didn't feel safe in the streets,  and you said you didn't go to Central London because you didn't feel safe there. So are you now saying that wasn't "personal"? "Fire from the hip." Another interesting choice of words 🙄 I'm not "demanding" anything! I asked you some perfectly reasonable questions in  response to your own statements. None of which you have answered. Never mind. It seems to be pointless having a discussion with you. It's long past my bedtime. I'm going to turn on my sleep app  and go to sleep 😴💤
    • Hi Forumites, This afternoon someone in a dark blue/black saloon car collided with my parked car on Thompson Road, SE22 9JR. I have a neighbour’s doorbell cam footage of the collision at 14:30 19/09/2025 but am unable to identify the registration plate. If anyone has footage of a car travelling down Thompson Road towards Crystal Palace Road at that time please PM me. Of course if the Perp would like to confess they can also PM me. Thankyou.
    • Fireworks again tonight, Melbourne Grove North LTN area.
Home
Events
Sign In

Sign In



Or sign in with one of these services

Search
×
    Search In
×
×
  • Create New...