Jump to content

Recommended Posts

I went swimming the other day and caught a female fellow swimmer giving me the eye. I checked to make sure nothing was hanging out or that there were no other reasons for her attention, but all was tucked in. I caught her glancing a few more times, but in the end I swam my lengths, got out and went home. I would have taken the opportunity to chat her up but a swimming pool felt like the wrong place to do this. Maybe the 'no petting' warning on the swimming pool walls of my youth have left their mark, though I guess I could be getting a little ahead of myself on that.

Hmmm


Jimmy I can see your problem here, but you could have said to her that you need a Tea/Coffee/Bovril and Packet of Crisps after a swim and did she care to join you?


At which point she may well have told you that your ultra tight white speedos are see through when wet (ultimate put down from my youth) but at least you had tried


Luv

Sadly - the only one I can think of for you Jeremy is


"Do you fancy getting your lips around something really meaty (mid length pause) like a cup of Bovril"


Tillie - I am worried about you, to do that implies it is 'nude night' at the baths....



Jeremy Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> Well at least you now have an incentive to go

> swimming more often. Definitely ask her if she

> fancies a bovril next time, or a game of Double

> Dragon.

>

> Trying to think of an amusing bovril-based

> innuendo...

LuvPeckham Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> Sadly - the only one I can think of for you Jeremy

> is

>

> "Do you fancy getting your lips around something

> really meaty (mid length pause) like a cup of

> Bovril"

>


Ha ha! That was good Peckham.

bigbadwolf Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> LuvPeckham Wrote:

> --------------------------------------------------

> -----

> > Sadly - the only one I can think of for you

> Jeremy

> > is

> >

> > "Do you fancy getting your lips around

> something

> > really meaty (mid length pause) like a cup of

> > Bovril"

> >

>

> Ha ha! That was good Peckham.



Sid the Sexist taught me all I know !!!

Hmmm


If you are looking for examples


How about the policewoman arresting you at the time.... for some reason it doesn't seem get you a better cell for the night


Or your best mate whilst you are comforting her, after she has just split up from her boyfriend of 6 years


Or your girlfriends best mate whilst your girlfriend is asleep in bed in the next room



No Idea why but the last two just failed to get me anywhere !!!

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Latest Discussions

    • My bike (a ELOPS 120 step over classic from Decathlon) was stolen from outside The Belham this afternoon. I locked it up while I collected my kids, then the street was so busy that I left it there while I walked them home. Did a few other things at home, came back about 5.30pm and it was gone. Sharing just in case anyone sees it or finds it anywhere - it’s a few years old and the chain is a bit rusty/makes a clicking sound so maybe there’s a slight chance someone would dump it! Really annoying and just a reminder to be really careful with bikes. The picture shows the bike model from the Decathlon website.
    • Thanks, I didn't know that.  People are even more stupid than I thought then, if they are willing to wait hours in A&E for an ingrown toenail. I presume they don't get put at the front of the queue. Why isn't the 111 service more widely advertised? That puts you in touch with a doctor, who will advise on the phone or visit, and if necessary  you will be advised to go to A&E or they will arrange an ambulance to take you.
    • It hasn't devolved. It's in exactly the same state it was when it started.
    • A&E isn't allowed to turn people away at the triage stage, even people with hiccups and ingrown toenails... the kinds of ailments a GP might be able to advise against seeking emergency care for. https://www.england.nhs.uk/2025/12/aes-under-siege-from-hiccups-and-ingrowing-toenails/
Home
Events
Sign In

Sign In



Or sign in with one of these services

Search
×
    Search In
×
×
  • Create New...