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school: expelled

Pie and Mash shop down The Cut: several years ago - for popping-out to get a bottle of HP sauce from local grocers after being told they didn't have any in the cafe.

driving: long story

couple of pubs: few years ago. fighting / weapons. to be fair it was not my fault entirely, I was just responding in kind but I was the ass that got caught.

Burma: not sure it's on their official records, didn't hang around to find-out, but the army took me near to Chedi Sam Ong (three pagodas pass) border and told me I was not welcome back in Burma. 'spying'.

Got deported from Holland.. Insufficient Funds... Missed The Floyd in Vondelpark 1971


Funny I had enough money to get back, get a train to the Reading Festival, pay for the festival,

eat and drink and get back home.


And to top it all, me and my mate got searched between the station and the festival.


And a Police man was shot and killed after he stopped a car in Reading Town Centre.

Unrelated to the festival..


DulwichFox

Otta Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> GSJ57 Wrote:

> --------------------------------------------------

> -----

> > Is anyone else wondering why MrBen isn't wanted

> at

> > this wedding?

>

>

> Hell yeah!


Me too. Come on lovely Mr Ben, spill..



PS Private Members' Club, Pall Mall. Early-Mid 90s (memory hazy).


The crime? Playing the piano without permission. Removing lightbulbs from chandeliers without permission. Food fight in the Dining Room without permission. Drug-taking on the fire escape stairway without permission. You get the idea.

hes scotch, his default position on a night out would be


Buckie heartstarter in the schemes kids playgound

30 pints of heavy in a single storey bar with no windows

single malt chasers

singing flower of scotland

argument over religion/ football

a farewell glasgow kiss

fish supper with brown sauce/vinegar condiment

Deep fried mars bar

keeking his breeks outside the 24 hour carry oot

a jag of Heroin

some highland clearances

off to bed




Would you want this at your wedding ?

Been thrown out of a lot of (not all licensed) places and given a 'you're barred' bon mot on leaving.


Was properly banned from Barclays Bank back in the 90s. A dispute between us eventually led to them writing to me - though I had plenty of money in my a/c - stating they were "no longer prepared to handle your account" and giving me a couple of weeks to take my accumulated wealth and fuck off.


They used slightly more technical language.

Banned from this weird army shop.


Customer was in front demanding a refund for something, and the cashier just wasn't having it - repeatedly pointing to some sign that was no more than a laminated scrap piece of paper that had "no refunds" on it.


So there I was waiting in line and minding my own business, when the guy suddenly turns on me and asks "here, would *you* notice that?" whilst pointing at the sign. Being the honest kid I used to be, I instinctively said "no" - immediately realising what a mistake I'd made when it was my turn to be served.


Cashier wasn't happy, he took my money and let me pay for my item but he told me I was no longer welcome.

I was heartbroken. I fricking loved that army shop :(

School trips - after spending a week's school trip to Arran in the Lamlash Hotel getting p*ssed all day with three friends. I was fifteen.

The Royal Oak, SE1 - my bipolar friend was in an 'up' phase and had a very loud conversation puntuated by many many Fs and Cs. They let me back after a few weeks but he's barred for life.

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