Ted Max

Any of the 'curtain twitching' threads ("Ooh, saw a blue light in SquintHarder Street last night, what happened?") I bet you click on them at least once though, just for a peek, like.

I was going to mention L?mer?ck thread. But took pity, and it's not on the front page anymore. "Any women with a brain, no life, and own trousers" has potential too.

Come on, the Goose Green fence thread is fantastic stuff. It's Mark's version of the labour of Sisyphus.

Two posts, Tony. Hardly long running. But fair enough.

Long running threads that you cannot be arsed to click on, or that you did click on once and, boy, are you never going back. Here's my selection, just culled from the current Lounge front page: The Song Game. Music Room. Gaming Room. Dark Room. Quiet Room. Scrabble Club. Badminton Anyone??? Word Association.

"That bike's not getting on my bus. And neither's her velocipede."

That Freddie Sears is a bit nippy, isn't he?

First guest list writes itself, though, doesn't it?

Brendan, yes it's the cricket ground at the end of the lane that goes up beside the railway arches off Burbage Road. You can wave sparklers and everyting.

CamberwellOz, that's not the attitude at all. I think you will find you were plagued by greedy f*ck trophies, overly influenced by American TV into demanding money with menaces, and that your elderly neighbour (who doesn't exist) was really scared by the whole thing. Phillyboy, depending on exactly where you are, I would expect maybe a few rings of the doorbell, but nothing wholesale.

Usually free ones at Brockwell Park, and also over in Southwark Park - depending on where Lambeth and Southwark Councils have decided on this year. Worth checking the Council websites, I'd reckon. There's also a ?5 pay-on-the-door one at Dulwich Sports Club on Burbage Road - once inside there's a bar, BBQ, sweet stalls etc. EDIT: Southwark Park display and Brockwell Park display.

The first direct train doesn't start running until 9:11 and takes 10 mins. They are then every 15 mins on the quarter hour through the day. Usefully, in the rush hour, there is no such service, and you would have to go up to St Pancras before doubling back.

Sean puts Goose Green to Kings on the Rye at 75 yards. I think he might be Spring Heeled Jack.

It's a shame you are denied the platform for this sort of sensible advice on the Tweenies.

Well, really. I quite regularly do the Blackfriars to Holborn walk and it's a good one. I suppose from LB you are adding on a fair whack, but I love walking around that area so would probably do that too, as it also cuts down your walking at the SE22/15 end of things.

I think that settles it, really.

Peckham Rye From their elevated position, the watching crowd views the approaching train with sharp expectancy. Extremities are pumped with oxygen after an invigorating, sequential climb to the privileged ledge. Not for these titans the miserly up-ramp shuffle of their predecessors on the line. A grinder flashes day-bright sparks into the clear morning, its whirr ascending with clarity and purpose into the station's cathedral acoustic.

East Dulwich Halt. The rattle of the tracks calls the shuffling commuters to attention. The 7:51 to London Bridge halts, and plumes of breath mingle tighter as the familiar shuffling order is formed, unthinking, round the sliding maw of the carriage. Inside, half-heard beats leak out of the seated passengers' ears; white wires connecting thinly to a life beyond. Warmth seeping from her burrow under platform 2, the vixen nuzzles the hungry bellies of her newborn cubs.

I appreciate Peckham Rye station might be a bit over-resourced for the native ED-er, used as you are to once-an-hour tumult of the East Dulwich Halt. But once you get used to the friendly and knowledgeable staff, the handy cashpoints, the multitude of destinations, the sounds of Magic FM drifting up from Tara Steel Fabrications, the four (count 'em) platforms, you'll soon overcome your fear of the new and make the switch.

Shush with your post-modernist urban elitism, Sean. These two blokes are dodgy sorts who were due what they're getting.

As I said, PGC, your lot are common as muck round here. Shame on you.

Women with career, no kids, own money. Indexing on trend. Women with no career, no kids, no money. Indexing low. Women with no career, own kids, no money. Over-indexing strongly. Women with career, someone else's kids, own money. Slightly under indexing. Women with no career, someone else's money, own kids. SE21.

Why is your housemate so angry? I'd be interested to know. I think Brown was merely heading off what the Government knew what was coming - the Tory party, looking to get back in Rupert's good books after the Osborne stuff, ramping up the anti-BBC feeling. A short statement from Brown that action should be taken if any rules were broken stops the press and Tories making a direct Labour-BBC left-liberal-elite blah blah blah connection. And contrary to your Brown point, I think the Crunch was playimg well for Brown's personal ratings, and the Tories and Tory press were all too keen to have some good old moral outrage to deflect attention.

I think it's all that, plus from a media point of view: it's a dream cast list. The publicity-hungry burlesque dancer; the ageing actor suddenly upgraded to national treasure status; the sexually vainglorious ex-junkie; the smartarse millionaire tightrope merchant. I'd wager most of the people phoning in don't really have much feeling about this particular situation, just that they feel, or have been told, that the BBC is moving away from them, and what they'd like it to be, and this gives them the chance to let off some of that steam. The fact that the Tories are running a co-ordinated campaign on this says a lot.

But not better than Harry Hill's TV Burp.