pebbles

Oh my god Mellors you had a Brazilian man clean for you - ooooooerrrrr - wish i'd known you then cos i might have invited myself over :) - doesn't baby oil just rock :0

thanks, will go and join tesco's now

unfortunately i've got a fussy son who wouldn't eat any of what we eat so he lives on fishfingers, frozen veg, pasta & tom sauce, etc etc and then my daughter eats what we've eaten the night before. i always make too much veg cos i can then hide it in pasta sauces and stuff for son. i DREAM of the day that he eats what we do. i'm actually loving the idea of shopping on line. i use sainsburys as a bit of an hours entertainment so if we're at a loss and bored at home we'll go shopping but then i end up buying bad stuff for me so at least with online shopping i can only buy what is on the list - what online shopping site d'you recommend? is ocado much more expensive? i never do things by halves - have just made banana muffins!!! I NEVER BAKE instead of just doing one ny resolution i seem to keep adding to them!!! ps - sink still shiny :)

thank you littleEDfamily, sunday night planning is the way to go then!!! i think i'm going to invest in one of Fushia's meal organisers

littleEDfamily - i didn't have anything else to shine and i'd seen people shine kettles, hobs etc before with baby oil so i thought i'd give it a go and it looks great. cos it's then so greasy any dirt that gets onto the sink does get easily wiped away - give it a go!!! felt really really rushed this morning so have just done nursery drop off and came back and just made my bed which i'm happy with :) no gotta switch off edf and do some work! fushia - have u always planned meals - i don't but am thinking that could be quite useful for my organisation cos i'm normally being nagged by the kids that they're hungry and i've got nothing up my sleeve. can you or anyone help with how i start if i have never done it before for us or kids - we annoyingly quite often have just meat or something cos i haven't looked in fridge to makesure that there's veg or salad!!! (i don't know how my husband doesn't tell me to get a grip!!!) - any advice seriously welcome thanks

Dully/Fushia - i take my hat off to you both, u r both amazing I'm Dulwich born and bread and 32 with 2 older brothers. Having spoken with my mum she said that she didn't take us to any groups as they weren't around however there was a group of 4 mums who every week one mum would take the 4 kids so 3 of the mums had 2 hours off so basically 3 out of 4 weeks they had time off which she said was her life saver as being at home non stop really did drive her to distraction!!! (i told her i didn't think i could ever have driven her to distraction and she just laughed!!!). Like some other people she said we just played around her while she got on with jobs. Our house was always very clean but totally lived in - if that makes - and still now that's what i think when i go to my mums (still local) - clean but lived in. With regards to playing out - we played out in Dulwich woods, cycling up and down the local roads, popping in and out of friends houses without parents actually knowing where we are. Unfortunately I know I won't allow our children the same privilege. My bro and family live in a village near Stratford upon Avon and they all play out on the "local green" and I totally see why he made the decision to leave Dulwich (although I can see myself here forever). FlyLady update - well today - my sink is sparkling again and after 10 days of piling up I actually managed to put away ALL THE CLEAN CLOTHES - truly amazing. I can now see floor space in the children's rooms and our spare room bed!!! Kids clothes are also out ready to get them dressed tomorrow morning. My husband thinks something is seriously wrong with me cos he doesn't understand how a thread on a forum and some website called FlyLady could want me to baby oil the sink to make it sparkle!!!!!!!

SB - we also use the miracle ironer who picks up and drops off the following night. Honestly couldn't live without them!!!

littleEDfamily - sorry to be ignorant - how do you descale mugs? ok, i've gone beyond beginner steps now but i've just found while searching the net the saying "3 plus 1" when decorating your mantlepiece - http://www.fireplacemall.com/Article_Library/Fireplace_Mantel_Decorating__T/fireplace_mantel_decorating__t.html so i've just gone around the whole house trying to find suitable things and i've just redesigned my mantlepiece - that's always in front of me when i'm watching tv and on internet - it actually looks quite good - i'm normally a picture type girl but i now have 3 candlestics on one side and a vase on the other (just need the flowers now) - all we need now is a mantle clock!!!! i've always been a pj type girl but now i'm having to leave the house in the morning to take no1 to nursery i'm actually having to get dressed when i get up cos otherwise mornings just turn into horrendous rushing. what i've also realised is going to work is making sure both kids are dressed before we even venture downstairs cos then we don't need to go back up again - i did it this morning for the first time and it really made my morning so much smoother!!!

well.... my sink is clean... shiny due to baby oil!!!! now i don't really want to ever use it again :) am now sitting on sofa watching the biggest loser (never seen it before, it's brilliant :), and am looking at fire place that hasn't been cleaned since fire at weekend and you know what... i think i might get dustpan and brush and bag and clean that out as well - ooooer bed still unmade though and toys everywhere but as flylady says - babysteps sadly i'm actually really excited!!!!

littleEDfamily - i've just been checking FlyLady out - tell me, have you started at day1 ie clean the sink or have you skipped to when you actually start doing stuff. I'm really interested cos a bit like a diet i need to be told when and what to do!!!! any info greatly appreciated

I think Crystal Palace 1 club is a huge hit with that age group (my son is 3 1/2 and loves it) - opens 9.30-12.30 and 1-4 Any softplay area is also great - I go to the one at Beckenham Spa but there's one at Peckham Pulse as well

A great tip i was given about grobags was put them on back to front so when my boy started to take his off I put the zip at the back and voila... never again :)

that sounds lovely amyw - pls can you post piccie cos i'd like to try that out thanks

Hi Byngo Not exactly one cake but i've got teddy bear baking tray that makes 6 teddy bears and I did this for my daughters 1st birthday and decorated them with icing and smarties etc. You are very welcome to borrow, no wine needed but maybe a bear for my son!!! Live on Friern Rd and we are at home all day today if you want. Sally

Totally duped Pickle, i spent the hour before you arrived doing a HUGE tidy up!!! Why d'you think you didn't go into the sitting room - cos that's where all the cr*p was!!! Even Claire mentioned how tidy the house was!!! Sorry :)

Suzisoo - i love the lost property basket and i know doing the paperwork weekly really will make a huge difference. The one thing i really want to do is instead of folding up washing and putting on bedroom floors is put away immediately cos one wash of items will only take a minute to put away won't it? I also like the 10 minute tidy thing cos that's all it takes really. This morning I told our 3 1/2 yr old son that we were going to tidy all day!!! anyway, i haven't quite finished his bedroom as i was moving toys from downstairs up etc etc and there's still quite a bit on his floor. So we put him down and a few minutes later he calls out for me so i go upstairs and he says "i'm going to have nightmares cos my bedroom is so messy can we tidy it pls" oh did i laugh :)

I'm clean but not tidy!!! Probably every 2 or so months i go out of my mind with how disorganised our house is and my husband and I will spend a weekend (like this weekend) going through everything and putting everything in the rightful place. Every time we do this I vow to myself that I won't let it get that bad again.... but it does... within days. I have a few problems - toys - getting dumped into boxes to make floor look tidy but then toys are mixed up!!, clothes - i do our washing once a week and probably do about 5 washes in a day, not deliberately mind you, and i'm really pleased with myself and have the piles on everyones floors to put away but then i don't put away and everything gets mixed up and thrown around the rooms while looking for clothes and then i don't know whats clean or dirty!!! paperwork - i'm very good at opening letter and putting into piles depending on relevance but they don't get filed, they get put into one pile, they then get mixed up and then 2 months later like tonight my husband and i will spend our evening on the floor going through this HUGE pile of paperwork and putting it into the right piles and then we file (this is seriously stressful and that's why i'm on EDF and not helping him!!!) So.... I do sometimes get embarrassed about my clean but untidy house. When new friends come over i make sure it looks tidy but my regular friends know exactly what i'm like. Two of my closest friends are not just tidy but unbelievably tidy, nothing is ever out of place. I do sometimes dream of being like them but then i think that it's not me, i'm not minimalist, i like having stuff everywhere BUT i would like to be more organised and i would like to spend a little bit more time to put things in their rightful places rather than just dumping kids in bed, pouring myself glass of wine and putting feet up - literally 20 seconds to do it!!! So... will i change?? Who know's but tomorrow I will put toys away in right places before the kids are in bed so it doesn't lesson my pouring glass of wine time!!! littleEDfamily - if you find someone who does help people like us for a living please let me know as I would be interested (however I don't think I could tell my husband or my mum as they would quite rightly so think it was a huge waste of money!!!)

Hysterical Pickle - I think like that regularly however I think about selling him on Ebay to someone who doesn't mind giving him pasta and pesto for every single blooming meal!!!

radnrach - i also weaned both mine early - son 41/2 m and daughter 51/2. both were good weights and at the time son was fully breast fed but daughter i had just moved over to formula. bluesperted - to be honest, if mine were content to stay on breast milk and were happy then i would have waited so go with what you feel is right and what your little one "is telling you". mine just seemed to be getting bored with milk, wasn't drinking enough i didn't think but were highly unhappy. their sleep having been good started to be disturbed and also both were interested in solid food. i would quite often find my daughter trying to eat my sons food if it were at easy reach. i know all these signs can be attributed to other things but i just "felt" that it was the right time for them and they've never looked back. son is now quite fussy (going through that horrendous phase) but luckily daughter still eats whatever is put in front of her.

To be honest it annoys me. It seems like the rules for babies just change the whole time - how long they can be in a carseat (with my nephew there wasn't a 2hr time limit), drinking alcohol (mummy's not babies!!), weaning (4m/6m), how long to sterilise (used to be 6m) etc etc. Mums put themselves under enough pressure as it is without having what they're told and follow undermined the whole time.

I found it wasn't formula but bottles???? I used to express quite a bit with no.1 and gulping down the bottle definitely made him windy compared to "gentle" sucking of the boob!!! Maybe getting too much air in the teat???

oh wow, i love it, i'll give this idea a go tomorrow - i'm definitely feeling positive :)

damzel - i'm loving your sil's idea - but.... i'm not sure what you mean? sorry if i sound dumb but how would i make it sound like it was his idea?

I also agree with go with your gut feeling about how you will cope and also what no1 is like. I knew 2 things: firstly - my son was totally ready to spend a few hours away from me and i actually thought it would be beneficial for him. Having seen all the nurseries and not being totally happy I went with a childminder and I haven't looked back. I love her, he loves her and she loves him. I started it 6 wks before due date so that he hopefully wouldn't have put 2 and 2 together. it started as 2 mornings a week and then went to 2 days. secondly - i thought i was going to struggle. i suffer from insomnia and had had an horrendous pregnancy so being totally selfish i knew that i was going to need a break and i felt that just having the baby on her own for a bit each week would allow me to put my feet up and feed and watch tv in peace and get the much needed rest to keep my sanity - as well as pace up and down the room to console!!! I think every mother/father is different and just try and be as honest as possible about yourself and your no.1. My main advice though is if you are going to put her into nursery/childminder do it quite a few weeks before no.2 is due (or quite a few weeks after no.2 comes) so that her life isn't turned upside down totally. Good luck with your decision.

No just afternoons 1-3.30 (i think) during winter and 1-4 in summer I think in the summer hols they open sometimes in the morning