(verbal) Assault just now in Peckham Rye Park

[Blah Blah]

The problem is, that being gay is not a physical trait, like ethnicity or height etc. I've know people assume someone to be gay, and been wrong. The OP is drawing a conclusion, which may well be based on certain stereotypical assumptions, which may give the right conclusion, but equally may not. It's an unreliable descriptor really, without knowing for sure.

[dimples]

Blimey that?s surprised me .

Sorry that this has happened .

there?s obviously two sides to this as This other dog must have freaked them out ? Im not excusing bad words , where was the owner of the dog ? I?m a fellow dog walker in peckham rye and have been for seven years and the couple you are referring too I see most days and seem lovely !

[rendelharris]

camberwell70 Wrote:

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> Rendell, who says, ever, I was having a chat with

> a black guy? I was having a chat with a gay guy?

Most people, in my experience. It's a natural linguistic trait to add an adjective to the noun to add more information for the reader/listener - "this tall woman got on the train", "A bald guy came over", "A black guy helped me push the car". Listen to people talking, it's a part of speech.

[Quia Differt]

rendelharris Wrote:

> Most people, in my experience. It's a natural

> linguistic trait to add an adjective to the noun

> to add more information for the reader/listener -

> "this tall woman got on the train", "A bald guy

> came over", "A black guy helped me push the car".

> Listen to people talking, it's a part of speech.

me.

100% right rendelharris imo.

You and I may now, possibly, disagree on my following point but it irritates me beyond distraction when someone is the victim of a crime and is able give some description of the perpetrator(s)and yet refuse, initially, to do so and often will not even after repeated requests for more information.

It is like they are putting their "PC" credentials above doing whatever they can to identify the culprits, though I realise, merely, stating skin colour , for example, will not suffice, in isolation.

Forgive my Sense of the Ridiculous but one recent example was when someone gave The Police " IC" Code rather than say.....

[John2598]

Just a quick heads up, I was driving down Dulwich Common yesterday about 18.00 and noticed two guys on a moped slowly driving on the pavement towards the pond obviously looking for a victim. Just be careful and don't let these people ruin your loving sunny day in beautiful Dulwich.

[Blah Blah]

rendelharris Wrote:

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> Most people, in my experience. It's a natural

> linguistic trait to add an adjective to the noun

> to add more information for the reader/listener -

> "this tall woman got on the train", "A bald guy

> came over", "A black guy helped me push the car".

> Listen to people talking, it's a part of speech.

It is, but as my previous post points out, there is a difference between a clear unmistakable physical descriptor and one that is assumed, and may or may not be correct. 'Obviously gay' could just as easily mean obviously many things other than being gay.

[siousxiesue]

John2598 Wrote:

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> Just a quick heads up, I was driving down Dulwich

> Common yesterday about 18.00 and noticed two guys

> on a moped slowly driving on the pavement towards

> the pond obviously looking for a victim. Just be

> careful and don't let these people ruin your

> loving sunny day in beautiful Dulwich.

This deserves it's own thread, being nothing to do with the verbal assault

[Monkey]

This is terrible, Lee. Absolutly horrible. I?d speak to 101 and Park Management if I were you.

[Robert Poste's Child]

Lee Scoresby, I hope your wife and her friend are feeling better. Do you know how the situation escalated? It sounds worrying that the two men shouted at them when it wasn't one of your dogs. Did they try to intervene between the men and whoever owned the dog that was involved, perhaps?

[JohnL]

Verbal abuse comes under "abusive words or behaviour" - but so many angry people around maybe the police don't bother - they interviewed me as a victim of something worse but said no resources to search CCTV unless you know the exact time. Ring it as 101 to register it I reckon. To be honest being a hot head I'd just give as I got (and I wouldn't be proud of that)

But remember there's a spectrum not just Straight and Gay.

[JohnL]

Anyway go high when they go low as the Michelle Obama said :)

[MarleyLover]

Hi Lee

I've seen this couple before several months ago when out with my dog, they are extremely defensive of their dog and yes I can confirm they are confrontational, moreso the asian man.

[Renata Hamvas]

Hi Lee,

I'm sorry to hear about the verbal abuse your wife suffered. I would suggest your wife does report it via 101 and to the park's staff. I could report it to the park's staff if you email me the details. [email protected]

Renata

[Take Note]

Thanks to your full description, Lee, I know who exactly you're talking about. They often walk their dog in Nunhead cemetery and have been offensively rude to a friend of mine. They are ridiculously over-protective of their dog. Thank goodness they're in the minority.

[dogdish]

I am horrified by the tone of this discussion, the way people who weren't there are piling in with derogatory comments and calls to involve the police, it's like mob rule. Getting shouted at in the park by people who are being protective of their dog is not a crime, however unpalatable it may be. This couple are very good people and their dog is seriously unwell. I don't know what happened but for goodness sake please stop all this mindless condemnation and apply some emotional intelligence.

[robbin]

dogdish Wrote:

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> ...the way people who weren't there are piling in with

> derogatory comments...

...I don't know what happened but for goodness sake please stop all

> this mindless condemnation and apply some emotional intelligence.

See the irony in what you just said there, dogdish?

[robbin]

And btw, a stranger aggressively shouting at someone in a park, in the manner described, may amount to a crime. Perhaps not a serious crime, but a crime nonetheless. If you think otherwise (i.e. that shouting is not, per se, capable of being a crime) then you are wrong.

[JoeLeg]

dogdish Wrote:

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> I am horrified by the tone of this discussion, the

> way people who weren't there are piling in with

> derogatory comments and calls to involve the

> police, it's like mob rule. Getting shouted at in

> the park by people who are being protective of

> their dog is not a crime, however unpalatable it

> may be.

Actually as has been shown you are quite probably wrong here.

This couple are very good people and their

> dog is seriously unwell.

So it sounds like you know them.

I don't know what

> happened

Hmmm, you seem to know the couple, so I?m reckoning you?ve heard their side of the story.

but for goodness sake please stop all

> this mindless condemnation and apply some

> emotional intelligence.

Frankly it sounds like your mates could benefit from the same advice.

Nice try, 1/10.

[rendelharris]

robbin Wrote:

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> And btw, a stranger aggressively shouting at

> someone in a park, in the manner described, may

> amount to a crime. Perhaps not a serious crime,

> but a crime nonetheless. If you think otherwise

> (i.e. that shouting is not, per se, capable of

> being a crime) then you are wrong.

Agreed, and it seems that at least three other people have had bad experiences with this couple which tends to lend the OP a good deal of credibility. Accusations of homophobia coming in 3,2,1...

[Penguin68]

The behaviour described by the OP is in no way symptomatic (or 'typical') of gay people - so if people do think they have acted wrongly or inappropriately that is not 'because they are gay' I would have thought in any one's minds.

To dislike what they are reported to have done or said (without necessarily thereby confirming the report as an absolute truth) seems entirely unexceptional and without prejudice to their lifestyle choices - you don't choose to be gay, you do choose to express it, I would have thought, not that expressing it carries any opprobrium.

There are many individuals whose behaviour I deplore, without then necessarily deploring any particular group that those individuals might be members of. To dislike what someone does is not the same as disliking what someone is.

[rendelharris]

I entirely agree P68 - but as this person, clearly a friend of the couple in question, feels it appropriate to accuse people saying it wasn't a good thing for two men to be screaming "fat bitch" in the park at someone who hadn't done them any harm (and nor had her dog) of lacking in "emotional intelligence", I feel the H word can't be far behind.

[JohnL]

It's obviously inappropriate, no-ones happy about losing their temper but it happens. The insults were horrible but obviously not really meant IMHO - I'd call it trash talk.

My advice would be apologise profusely and say you're under a lot of stress NOT double down.

[alice]

P68 the latter part of yr convoluted 2nd paragraph is ugly.

[IlonaM]

alice Wrote:

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> P68 the latter part of yr convoluted 2nd paragraph

> is ugly.

Get over yourself Alice. Really.

[alice]

When the unimportant becomes important.