a dulwich mum slaps her child .

[davy watts]

You're right. I should be on the big butts thread..not the child abuse one.

[paragon]

Whether or not this thread is a wind-up or not i didn't realise there was such a difference in opinion and this was outlawed.

I am 25 with no kids and if I saw a parent smacking a kid in public I wouldn't think anything of it whatsoever. Is there a real stigma against it?

[dulwichmum]

I want to know, where was the nanny while all of this was going on? They sound like such nice people - with their lovely speaking voices and everything!

[JudoMum]

I think we must have been separated at birth! I could've written that post,(except the smack bit). I have been waiting for some endorsement of the ear flicking technique. The only drawback is that they (3 boys, 3 - 8 yrs) now have a flinch response whenever I raise my hand in anger!!

[Atila Reincarnate]

Annasfield Wrote:

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> When I was a child there was nothing that I feared

> more than being told off by mother. Therefore I

> generally behaved. I was smacked as child (not

> regularly as I soon learnt my lesson) and don't

> blame my Mum for using that form of discipline.

>

> A child being slapped/smacked is quite different

> to being hit.

>

> Parents have the right to discipline (within

> boundaries) their children as they see fit. As s

> child I honestly believe that the respect I had

> for my parents certainly helped to quickly learn

> between right and wrong.

Well said Anna, exactly what happened when I was young.

[Mick Mac]

Parents can teach their children right from wrong without hitting them / slapping them. This debate is not about whether parents teach right from wrong - of course all parents seek to achieve that, its whether its necessary to hit/slap them to achieve that.

I believe that in years to come we will look back with disbelief that the only acceptable violence allowed in society today is against children.

I don't blame my parents for using that form of discipline not do I blame this generation of parents, its up to them to make a choice, (although I have to say I hate to witness a child being smacked) but we have made the choice to discipline our children without slap/smack/hit as I really believe it is wrong and I believe it will be seen to be so in the future.

[ClareC]

The country has gone crazy!

My parents smacked me as a child as was the norm in the 70's / 80's. It was certainly not violence but dicipline and quite honestly it worked! The worst threat of all was "wait til your dad gets home!" My parents are decent non violent people whi genuinely wanted the best (not in a material way) for their daughters and made sacrifices to ensure we had the childhood we did.

I remember the headmaster at junior school had a cane too, I never knew him to use it but quite honestly the knowledge it was there was enough.

Funny how since it became non PC for parents to smack and for schools to have cane's the discipline of the kids today seems to have gone to pot!

I honestly do not believe in violence against anyone children included but if a parent chooses to discipline via smacking, provided it's not in anger then I don't see the problem. Didn't do me any harm and I certainly had respect for my parents / teachers / policeman etc something that is rather lacking these days!

[Chick]

Smacking gave you respect for policemen? How about a severe beating like those given by the TSG at the G20 protest, would your respect grow? And why not in anger?

[Brendan]

Hang 'em all!

[bigbadwolf]

Hang em where Brendan?

[Brendan]

High.

[bigbadwolf]

Hang en high drop em hard.....am I on the right track Brendan?

[Brendan]

Bloody kids.

[Mick Mac]

Clare - The sort of respect I would achieve by hitting my child is the sort of respect I don't need. Thanks.

[Annasfield]

Chick Wrote:

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> Smacking gave you respect for policemen? How about

> a severe beating like those given by the TSG at

> the G20 protest, would your respect grow? And why

> not in anger?

Thats not what ClareC said now is it?

As a kid if I got in trouble as school, I was more concerned about what my parents would say when they saw the report. If I was out with my mates and they started acting like scallies, I was more frightened of the reaction that my parents would have if I was brought home by the police rather than actually being caught by the police. Therefore - I behaved.

I can probably count on one hand how many times I was actually smacked by my parents, but knowing it could happen made sure I towed the line.

Everyone (eugh, nearly typed Everton then) has the right to their own opinion. If a smack on the back of your children's legs doesn't work for you, then don't do it. At the same time, I don't think it's right to judge people that advocate it.

*puts on tin hat*

[Jah Lush]

daizie Wrote:

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> I have just witnessed a middle class family, lose

> their temper with a three year old, in front of

> the general public, and slap their child round

> the back of the legs ! I really didnt think that

> happened here! I am shocked .

My mother regularly slapped me on thighs if I misbehaved, which was often. When I look back I really must have tried her patience far too often for her to lose her temper with me in such a way but I probably deserved it. Still, most times she just had to give me that look and I'd full into line for fear of getting a smack.

As for the class comment - shove it.

[bigbadwolf]

Bloody hell, you lot don't know how lucky you were. I'd get the belt or if I was very naughty the cane!

[Keef]

My dad just had to start to get up from his seat, and I'd be legging it to the bathroom (only room in the house with a lock). He'd not actually get as far as all the way out of his seat, but I wouldn't know this as I was sitting on the loo wondering when it would be "safe".

I'd then creep past the living room, up to my bedroom. I'm sure they knew exactly what I was doing, but wouldn't show it. This probably happened about 4 or 5 times in total, but I remember it well.

Now I'm grown up, I don't think I'm a bad / messed up guy, and I know my parents both love me.

That said, a good friend of mine used to get regular smacks from his heavy handed dad, after a few beers, and that is never a good thing!

I am basically with ClareC on this, but having said that, I like to think I'll manage to not hit my daughter when she is naughty. However, I'd rather a little controlled smack that teaches a lesson, than her getting so naughty, I lose it and actually HIT* her!

* I don't think I've ever hit anyone in anger, so this is unlikely!

[Reg Smeeton]

This is the kind of jolly thread that poppylucky used to start.

[Jah Lush]

bigbadwolf Wrote:

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> Bloody hell, you lot don't know how lucky you

> were. I'd get the belt or if I was very naughty

> the cane!

Pah! You were lucky. I was whipped and birched morning, noon and night and when I was particularly bad one day my mum chopped my head off with an axe. Kids these days. You don't know how lucky you are.

[Atila Reincarnate]

Jah Lush Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> bigbadwolf Wrote:

> --------------------------------------------------

> -----

> > Bloody hell, you lot don't know how lucky you

> > were. I'd get the belt or if I was very naughty

> > the cane!

>

>

> Pah! You were lucky. I was whipped and birched

> morning, noon and night and when I was

> particularly bad one day my mum chopped my head

> off with an axe. Kids these days. You don't know

> how lucky you are.

You call that harsh, I used have all my limbs choped off, head chopped off, fed to the lions, burnt at the stake, and sent off to bed without any tea. Young uns today they don't know they're born. I'm off to race my whippet and feed my pigeons.

[Jah Lush]

You had a bed Atila? You lucky lucky bastard.

[HonaloochieB]

Anyone else think the title of this thread sounds like a Betjeman poem?

[bigbadwolf]

Jah Lush Wrote:

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> You had a bed Atila? You lucky lucky bastard.

They don't know that they're born do they Jah. I remember when my dad would slap me upside the head with his ration book.

[Atila Reincarnate]

Jah Lush Wrote:

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> You had a bed Atila? You lucky lucky bastard.

When I say bed, I mean a drainage ditch filled with pig slurry and a rock for a pillow.