Dulwich Born And Bred

Either way it is still legal, she could be having personal problems, it might just be the one time etc etc etc.

I didn't say every day. I said if you saw a pregnant woman downing a bottle of vodka.

I have a maclaren and it is still not easy at all to get baby out, grab my handbag, changing bag, his toys and blanket, and then fold it down whilst making sure it is locked, and then somehow grab everything and get on the bus? Impossible. You need two people. Years ago most buses had conductors on them, so they would help you and stop the bus whilst you get on with baby etc. Babies and buggies are obviously bug bears for a lot of people.

Ok let me break this down simply. You can get cancer and asthma despite not smoking etc. BUT smoking INCREASES the chances of getting it. Is that clear? So if something increases the chances...why do it? I find it also amazing that despite the fact that cigarettes has 4000 nasty things in it, that 69, yes SIXTY NINE of those ingredients are known to cause cancer, that is ok, because it is just one ( as far as we know it was just the one) and Vodka, though it is legal, and has a lot less ingredients, is not the same? So why is it one rule for one and one rule for the other? Vodka very bad, Cigarette bad. Are you for real?

I have lost my grandfather to Lung Cancer, and my uncle is recovering from Lung Cancer, both are smokers, and they are not even heavy smokers but nonetheless they smoked so yes, it IS black and white to me. Smoking is bad. Full stop. When it comes to my son's health and wellbeing and being as he is the most precious thing in the world to me, I would never take something that could harm his health, especially when it is proven that they are harmful. That is common sense. I asked about Kings college because I have dealt with them many times and it amazes me how a lot of staff there all dish out different advice that conflicts with their colleagues. Yes, we all agreed that smoking was harmful, but rather than say to the OP " I don't agree with you verbalising your thoughts, even though I don't agree with smoking" a lot of you were really rude and was more concerned about the mother despite the fact she was smoking. I find that bizarre. She is an adult. I just hope she does not become one of those parents smoking over their child.

Err but they didn't ask me so they didn't know that! sophiesofa Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > HeidiHi Wrote: > -------------------------------------------------- > ----- > > I don't smoke anyway but my point is, if > smoking > > it better than stress levels why was I not told > by > > Kings, my doctor etc to smoke as that is better > > then my stress level being through the roof? > > err, because you weren't a smoker in the first > place.

It is nothing to do with research, you drink a glass of wine, it alters your feelings/mind, you smoke a cigarette, you get that nicotine hit, THAT alone would tell you that it cannot be good for a baby so one should refrain from it when pregnant. Calling me perfect is just a cheap shot. I understand people are different, that is obvious, but children do not get a say in anything, it is down to US as adults to ensure that they are given the best start. That is all I am saying. When you have children, it is no longer about US but THEM.

Vodka is legal Sean, so if a pregnant woman was to down a bottle of vodka, why is that different? Cigarettes has over 4000 ingredients in it, 69 of those are known to cause cancer,Vodka a lot less.

I don't smoke anyway but my point is, if smoking it better than stress levels why was I not told by Kings, my doctor etc to smoke as that is better then my stress level being through the roof? I was told no smoking, no drinking, eat lots of healthy food and walk as much as possible. Common sense really but some people don't realise it. The NHS points out clearly that one cigarette causes your baby's heart to work faster because of the lack of oxygen. That alone would be enough for me. As said my mother is the perfect evidence of someone who had a strong addiction from the age of 13, she gave it up, people do give it up, so it IS possible. I would think that if there is ever a time to give up something, it would be pregnancy since you are carrying a life, and that life is being made inside of you, don't people owe it to their babies to make sure they are given the chance to develop properly? I work with children, so for me, it is paramount that every child is given a good start in life from conception onwards. That does not make me a saint, I think it makes me normal, but obviously not.

Ditto Plimsoul! I was under great stress when I was pregnant, I didn't feel that I was stressed but my blood pressure was through the roof for some reason or other, and my midwife/doctor didn't tell me to have a cigarette or a glass of wine to calm down, I was told to do yoga, swimming or exercise even breathing exercises. Countless women are stressed during pregnancy, morning sickness, hormones and the rest, it is a very life changing time and it is understandable for stress levels to rise. My mother was a very heavy smoker, she smoked since she was 13, and she was a chain smoker but for each of her five children, she stopped smoking throughout the duration of her pregnancy, she would be the first to say she lacked education when she was younger but she was smart enough to know that the cigarettes could not be good for the baby. Her babies were more important than her addiction. When her grandchild was born, she gave up smoking completely, she went cold Turkey and I am so proud of her because I know how much she smoked and it must have been extremely hard for her to give up, but as my mother would say " If you want something bad enough, you will do it" and I agree with her. I find it hard to believe that a medical professional would encourage someone to smoke, I am not saying yours didn't say that but if I had medical professionals who said it was ok for me to smoke, I would be changing my hospital, I have family members who work in the medical field and I asked them and they said "No" they always try to encourage the mother to give up smoking and that is the advice they are given. Was it Kings College?! So if we saw a heavily pregnant woman downing a bottle of vodka/taking herion/coke/smoking a cannabis etc we should turn a blind eye because they might be under stress/lost a family member/ recieved bad news/it might be their first one?:-S ok then. That is the last I am saying on the matter, because I say Kudos to the OP! I would not have had the guts to say it but I would have given her a look!

Is it bad that this photo made me feel a bit better about my lardy self? http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1296669/Was-Clare-Nasirs-bikini-workout-photo-forget-Or-big-opportunity-GMTV-weathergirl.html

I would love to do this with my son. Only ideas I can think of is: Soupdragon Goose Green Centre Centre in Dulwich Park Do let us know if you do find a venue in the area as I would love to sign up for it.

I struggled with breastfeeding, and it was only thanks to the help of my midwife and my brestfriend cushion that I managed to breastfeed successfully. My cushion came everywhere with me for the first few months as I could put baby on it, and use both hands to latch him on, plus the height was ideal as he was completely in line with my breast and was able to latch on with ease, I also used a breast feeding cover so I did not feel exposed breastfeeding in public for the first few months. I no longer use the breast feeding cushion as he is a big boy now but I still use a thin pillow to feed him on.

LOL your sense of humour is great Quids! Clare, I am so sorry that you had problems with the bus, it is very disheartening when that happens. I have only ever got on the 12 and 40 with my buggy and had no problems at all ( I used to use my sling which made life so much easier but my son is too heavy for that now) I have witnessed mums having problems with bus drivers and their buggies and my poor sister incurred the wrath of a bus driver also who told her she should not be getting on a bus with a buggy, she learnt to drive after that as she vowed never to go through that again. I suppose from the bus drivers point of view they have to deal with lots of mums and buggies every single day, and some of them are probably not very patient about it. Even though there was no one on the bus, he might have wanted to get moving for one reason or other ( break? clocking off time? etc) but that is no excuse and I don't understand why people who work in customer focused jobs have to be aggressive and short tempered , especially when you are not being rude to him and trying your best to manage a baby and fold a buggy. I have no advice to offer but I feel your pain. I personally try to avoid buses with my buggy as much as possible, as I KNOW that one of these days I am going to encounter a stroppy bus driver.

No, I think rather than explain what a Chav is, she just copied and pasted from a website as that is how they all describe a chav. helena handbasket Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > ::o > NFW! > > Did you really just say that? > > > > > Chavs are completely amoral, having never been > > subjected to right and wrong by their > inattentive, > > uncaring and often absent parents. Poorly > > educated, non-skilled job with no chance of > > improving/ on the dole, normally obese with > three > > children and one on the way, sounds common and > > feels the need to broadcast it to everyone > within > > a three mile radius, cheap shiny Argos > jewellery, > > no manners. Almost always smoke and drink White > > Lightning and buckfast tonic wine.

EDfamily, I did correct myself on page five though and said I should have said he was Nigerian.

Thanks Legalbeagle, you understand where I am coming from. I think it is ironic that Anna is presuming I am racist, who says I am a white person sitting behind the monitor? I could be black, I could be Nigerian. As I said, I am half black so hardly racist am I, think my dad would have something to say about that!? But yes I was saying the UK as a society does not accept that behaviour.

Where did I say all Nigerians beat their kids? What part of It might not be against the law to beat kids in your country but it is in the UK is confusing?!! I am letting him know that since he was beating his son in public and he was from abroad and not aware of our laws, that it is not acceptable to do that in THIS country as we have laws , and that the police would be involved, hence the police being called because it is against the law in this country. I mean, kicking his son on the floor in a hospital in front of a busy waiting room?! He obviously thought he could get away with it! For goodness sake my dad is black!:-S annaj Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > HeidiHi, cruelty to a child, such as you > described, is wrong and should always be > challenged. You were right to do so. But > suggesting that someone would abuse a child, > because he is Nigerian is racist and racism should > also always be challenged. I have reported you > post.

Giggirl, Apologies for offending you. As for that poor little boy, I only hope he is ok.

I must stop posting on the East Dulwich forum, correction, I must only post on the classifieds! Let's all agree to disagree like we do about most things!

I knew he was Nigerian, So I told him in HIS country ( meaning Nigeria), it might be acceptable to beat his kid, but in the UK we have laws for that. Someone asked me why I said in his country it would be acceptable, I replied he was African. I should have replied, he was Nigerian. Stop nitpicking. Nigeria DOES have a bad human rights record, Amnesty International if you want to google?

Is it bad that I think it was selfish and she should be ashamed of herself for smoking? The evidence was there, huge baby bump and the lady smoking? I don't class that as name calling, I just class that as truth. If it was me and someone said that to me, I would be offended, and anger but I could hardly deny that I was not selfish and that I am not potentially harming my baby? I don't have no problems with people smoking, pouring booze down their throats, etc because they are adults, it is their bodies and their lives, but when it comes to babies, I just cannot stand it when people put their own needs above their babies. I wanted my weekly bottles of wine when I was pregnant, I spent years having a few nice bottles of a weekend,but when I become pregnant, it was no longer about me, and nine months out of my life to not be selfish is not asking for much. But then humans generally cannot resist temptation can they? My sister and my mum would agree with you all and say that we have no rights to say anything since it is none of our business, but I feel differently, if someone wore real fur in public, they leave themselves open to abuse, if someone smokes with a huge bump in public, they leave themselves open to abuse, even if no one says anything, you can bet someone will be tutting or giving them evil looks. The OP just verbalised to the person what most of us would be thinking.

And I think on here people should stop acting like a lynch mob and stop being extremely rude when someone says something that they do not agree with.It is possible to disagree with someone without restorting to playground name calling. I see it happening time and time again on this forum.

Sean, On this forum, people can be SO rude, I think the NAME calling is not right. Psycho etc. The OP did not call the smoker names, so I don't think it is right for people to call the OP names. Why can't people just say they think it was not her place to say anything instead of being rude? That is why the 'cowardly' people will PM in agreement rather than voice it on here because they don't want to put up with the backlash.

I am sorry, does Nigeria have a good track record for human rights? Who said that Africans are all abusers? I did not, I said that in Africa they might not have a law for smacking children ( and they don't) but in the UK we DO have a law for smacking children. Take that how you will.