dulwichmum

*Jumps up to dance with delight.* Points out that Peckhamgatecrasher should be careful when wearing a ruff, as I caught mine in a revolving door once and it was not pretty. The firemen were most helpful though...

I am afraid I forgot to watch, I had to feed the peacocks, and search for harpsichord lessons on Google...

Lovely Peckhamgatecrasher, I shall buy one specially. Does anyone know where I could get lessons on how to play the harpsichord?

*Opens large fan, obscures facial features and enormous glass of wine* *Flounces over to harpsichord, begins to play self pened piece* *Runs long fingered (lace gloved) hand through ringlets* Thinks to self - this underwear is a tad restrictive but makes my clevage look fab!... Smiles while thinking of Mr Ray Winstone...

Hurrah! Can I wear my pantaloons? "Zebedee" is a tad 1970's for my tastes, could be not call him Sir Astley Wilberforce Jones?

Perfect Keef, No doubt you shall be wearing a smoking jacket and cravat for your stag do at your club? The quiet room perhaps? Cigars before the drinking/body waxing/cellotaping to lamp post/eyebrow shaving etc...

West Dulwich!

Dear Brendan, Shame on you for trying to rationalise such filth. Father O'Connor shall be expecting you at St Thomas Moore on Saturday. If you don't turn up for confession, he shall telephone your mammy. Alan Dale, you shall have your legs smacked and be off to the naughty step the next time I clap eyes on you. This thread is complete filth. An early bath for the lot of you. Boy type stag do = a complete body wax for the chap in question, before getting drunk and cellotaped to a lamp post wearing a dress. Girl type hen party = weekend spa break with chums, followed by gourmet meal in fabulous restaurant and to bed early with a tub of luxury ice cream and a copy of Vogue.

Indeed, if anyone fancies playing bridge with Fatfightersforever - please could I join you? I would like to play the harpsichord in the background and perhaps do a little needle point while wearing an enormous corset with my hair up! Oh please - lets do it, I have fingerless white lace gloves here somewhere...:)

Dear Bob, What in the name of God and all of his saints and angels is "A glory hole?" If it is filth and deprivation depravity - I really will have to go and lie down. I have only recently recovered from finding out about "dogging" on College Road!

Indeed Asset - he bought Naomi a big rock and I remember at the time the newspapers were claiming Clayton bought Naomi a fabulous "black diamond" - isn't that just a piece of coal? No wonder she left him - cheap skate!

I shall buy a new pair of wellington boots a Barbor jacket and a telescopic lead specially for the occasion!

Indeed, I believe pythons and scorpions make fabulous pets too. It is not the animals that are the problem - it is irresponsible owners...

Lovely Downsouth, I must apologise if I have sounded hostile initially. I feel really protective about this forum, indeed Mockney, Keef, Mark, Ant, Polly and Sean et al. have been wonderful to me. I owe you guys so much (sniff). This forum is the best.

Why don't you crush him between two books and then stick him to your screen with blu tack?

What a super map! A little less than half of West Dulwich is taken up by green space (schools/parks/sports grounds/my back garden), approximately another third is taken up my Lambeth (OHMYGOD, I may have to go and lie down)and a third of it is residential streets - good luck with your forum sweetie. I hope the local pensioners are into their IT, or you could be really quiet. What are you going to talk about? The problem with farmers? (markets - clearly...) Why don't you just join in with us? We are terribly nice...

And further... East Dulwich protects West Dulwich from Peckham! I would consider moving house to Sydenham Hill if it wasn't for the damn doggers!

Indeed, there is no competition between East and West Dulwich. I am starting to consider West Dulwich to be the bubble wrap which protects east dulwich from Lambeth. We are entirely complimentary!

There is no competition, I love Southwark, I don't want to be killed in a drive by shooting... OHMYGOD, I live on the door step of Lambeth!!! How many light bulbs do I have to leave on all night in order to make enough ice bergs to melt to submerge Brixton? I think I shall buy a Range Rover and be done with it! "Open the fridge door Ana, consider this an emergency..."

Lovely Downsouth, Have you not heard of the Dulwich Village Infants School, The Hamlet or St Anthonys? They are all outstanding super state schools in Southwark. I would never dream of venturing over to Lambeth...

Lovely DG, You should pick up a copy of SE21 magazine. It is simply fabulous. I haven't seen a copy of this months SE22 yet. Poor you DG, unemployed are we? Diddums...

Perfect BM, Indeed I wear sunglasses in the house, but if Bono wears his at the same time, I haven't a clue if he is looking at me when I am talking to him, and I find that so very irritating...

Dear Downsouth, Indeed - Rosendale Road, isn't that in Norwood/Lambeth - the location of choice for a stabbing/mugging/shooting. If you mention a highlight of that shopping parade as being the laundrette dear heart - I feel you are grasping at straws. Give me East Dulwich any day of the week. I have found that lovely Indigo deliver and the strange chemist is never ever open. Lovely CitizenEd, ah yes, Kingsdale - the local state school with two full-time beat officers! OHMYGOD! I shall visit the estate agents of East Dulwich tomorrow - I just find it incredibly difficult to park my enormous car over there... and are there any gardens big enough to accommodate my peacocks?

It is over by Dulwich College, off the South Circular. We have the shops on Croxted Road/Park Hall Road (you know - Cafe Rouge, Majestic Wines (hic... they deliver great crates of vino!!!) Threshers, Mini nasty looking Tesco, The Dulwich Trader, Porcini, super toy shop Cheeky Monkey, Dulwich Book Shop, Jo Partridge, The Alleyns Head - nice for a cold drink and a sit outside under an umbrella) and capacious mansions on Alleyn Road/Park and College Road - clearly! Watch out for peacocks... It is lovely over here - not cosmopolitan like East Dulwich, it is quiet. And you can park without having the mirror clipped off your car. 4X4 territory... Mic would hate it here - there are no dangerous dogs...

I must be honest, I think all of the action is on/off Lordship Lane. I am happy to consider the issues raised in this forum as I feel they usually have relevance to my life. Lovely Downsouth, I feel really strongly that if you raised any of the issues you talk about above - they would be graciously received and discussed on this forum. No-one has ever been less than gracious to me, and I can be really arsey sometimes! Look at the thread on Dangerous Dogs - I could be given a good slap for that - I live in SE21 afterall. I wish good luck to your new forum, but I prefer the lively mix on our East Dulwich Forum - I really doubt that another local forum could be so popular. I love these guys (sniff...) and I shall tell anyone who will listen.