bigbadwolf

If it's an older Merc i.e from the 90's then hot wiring will be quite easy. Take a 4 inch flat head screwdriver and a hammer. Place the screwdriver head with in the ignition and whack it in with the hammer. Start turnig the screwdriver anti clockwise until you hear a sharp crack and then with a wrench turn the screwdriver clockwise and it should start up as normal. No I'm not a car thief but my missus showed me how to do it. She's from the developing world, bless her.

Jah Lush Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Drink, drugs, lottery tickets and porn. The usual > short-cuts for people in despair. You forgot Jeremy Vyle.

*Bob* Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > I thought you guys just took extended trips to the > Portaloo with a copy of 'Razzle'? > > Times change, I suppose. Quite so although in the likes of 'Razzle' and 'Knave' the talent is a bit more hirsute compared to todays standard and besides, the H.S.E is striving to cut down on hand/arm vibration on site and a toppling Portaloo would be far to conspicuous to blame on some machinery 'dumping it's load'.

I'm lucky, I can access internet porn on my work computer without anyone knowing or caring. One of the perks of working on a building site with perverts for colleagues. Ha ha.

Right Sarah are you paying attention? Good, now this is what you have to do. 1)Go to the cash point and withdraw about ?30. 2)Go to Waterstones or any other high street book shop. 3)Locate IAN RANKIN'S 'REBUS' SERIES. 4)Select titles in CHRONOLOGICAL order, you'll be able to buy about three on the allowance I've advised but it's your money so feel free to spend more. 5)Pay, but then again if you want to add some spice/realism to this crime series, leave without paying. 6)Read. 7)On completion of your first purchase/5 fingered discount let everyone know how much you enjoyed them and how much of a genius bigbadwolf is fo suggesting them. If you don't I'll come round and knock your house down.

I had one come round but I mugged off all his Rhubarb by tasering the poor fool. You should have seen his face when I told him it ran off re-chargable batteries.

Ah was on me Xsh boxsh.

Oh and I forgot about Blue Peters Konnie Huq, I'd certainly give her a sticky back.

Thanks mate, your comments are very comforting to those damaged by the military.

JustG Those twentysomethings you envy so much are probably boring arseholes, I mean who has the homelife 'sorted' in their twenties. I'm 25 and I live in a pokey little studio flat in forest hill with miss wolf who was once an illegal immigrant who is slowly learning English and throws crockery at me when she's pissed off. Don't have a mortgage, view far to much internet porn, drink far to much, work in the freezing cold, frequently break the law, take drugs, have a dark sense of humor, I don't think before I speak (which is why a lot of people don't like me on this forum) and generally have a lot of fun in the process. I wouldn't worry about it JustG.xxx P.s I WILL NEVER GROW UP!

JUED Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > I was in the Thai Corner Cafe a few weeks ago and > noticed that they charge 50p for a glass of tap > water, understand that they have a right to charge > but 50p is bit steep. > > I think any restaurants that charge for tap water > should donate it to water charities like they do > at Banners in Crouch End. > > Think it's gone downhill as well, any other decent > local Thai restaurants other than Sema on LL? Take your own in future.

Disgusting behavior I know. When I was in the army cadets on Lordship lane as a lad we caught our corporal 'tea potting' whilst watching a copy of 'Swallows and Amazons'. For those of you who don't know or aren't at the disadvantage of having a revolting sense of humour the act of tea potting is performed by shoving your thumb up your arsehole whilst manually coaxing out some population paste which to a consenting or clandestine viewer put the w@anker into an a sort of abstract position of a tea pot, if you know what I mean.

I don't know if it counts but I used to knock one out whilst watching Zena warrior princess.

Did anyone see the news last night about that poor subpostmaster who was gunned down in Worcester defending his dad. The police think it may be a gang targeting post offices in the region. The offenders should be hung with piano wire!

A few years ago my parents had their 25th wedding anniversary and the food was fucking disgusting and the service was terrible. Years ago it was a descent pub but now it's rubbish and ridiculously over priced. ?4 for a pint of Staro pramen outside of the city, behave.

matthew123 Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > I think you mean Rye Lane. Peckham High Street is > where they soak them in batter to be deep fried > ;-) Yes I've noticed a shortage of pigeons in Peckham over the last few years.

Reminds me of that Sylvester Stalone movie 'stop or my mom will shoot', all joking aside I hope both you and your mum get over this terrible event.

Get nicked, it's just worse on a school night.

Talk about kebab dressed as mutton.

It never ceases to surprise me what people put in their sandwiches these days.

AAHH, so that's where they film porn.

Very rude.

Very funny, especially the irritating pop up 'mother in law'. Ha ha.

Education of an arsehole in the eyes of the public. Seriously though this is entirely out of character I assure you and I regret it came to that.

I'm not proud of hitting a kid but today I finally had ENOUGH! I was on the bus a couple of hours ago and about 15 to 20 school kids got on listening to 50 pence or P Dudley or whoever and barged past this bloke with his little girl about to get off the bus and when he protested you can imagine their response. One of these 'people' sat in front of me whilst I was on the phone to work. I asked him to turn his music down and once again you can imagine his response and accused me of being a sex offender so I belted him round the back of the head with alarming force (I'm not going to give you an E-fit but I'm a big lad), it would be viewed as assault by the courts by no mistake. The little turd fell quiet and so did the rest of the bus and boy did it feel good. I didn't hang about either. Have any of you lot done anything like that?