Jah Lush

A non-competitive sports day? Surely this is some sort of oxymoron? It's ridiculous, that's what it is. Stuff and bloody nonsense. If I could just quote the Bonzo Dog Band here:- "Sport, sport masculine sport equips a young man for society yes sport turns out a jolly good sort it's an odd boy who doesn't like sport." How about a few rounds of non-competitive boxing? I feel a sketch coming on here. The Pugilistic Pacifist anyone? Damn! already been done by Spike Milligan.

The last time I was there I had some dodgy oysters and was violently ill for the next 48 hours. Not surprisingly I have been rather fearful of going back there, although I did go to an 18th birthday party there last year and to be honest the food and service left a lot to be desired. I certainly wouldn't recommend it.

Raw fish....Yuk!!!!

Indeed, please don't let it happen again, I've had to do more than my usual fair share of work today and have missed my EDF fix....grrrr!

Hmmm...don't believe everything you read. I've seen some footage and Lizzy definitely gets the hump and storms off in a huff. Anyway, sod the royals, burn the lot of 'em I say.

Good grief! DM, I always had you down as an Agent Provocateur sort of girl.

Not on here you haven't. About once a month you come in for a right royal bashing from some of our patrons.

Hey I've got that on a picture disk, about the only thing I liked of theirs.

Maurice and his wife Esther visit the town carnival every year and every year Maurice always says: "Esther, I'd like to fly in that helicopter". Esther always replies: "I know Maurice, but the ride costs 50 quid, and 50 quid is 50 quid." One year Maurice pleads, "Esther, I'm 85, if I don't fly this year, I might never get another chance." "Maurice, the helicopter is 50 quid, and 50 quid is 50 quid," replies Esther. The pilot overhears and makes them an offer, "I'll take both of you up," he starts, "and if you don't say a word throughout, I won't charge you. One word though, and it's 50 quid." The couple agree. The pilot does all kinds of fancy moves, but not a word is spoken. He does his daredevil routine over and over again, but still nothing. When they land the pilot turns to Maurice and says: "I did everything to get you to yell out, but you didn't. I'm impressed!" Maurice smiles coyly, then says: "Actually, I nearly said something when Esther fell out, but you know, 50 quid is 50 quid."

See Sean's definition Macroban.

I think you could find yourself on the receiving end of quite a bit of grief for that post *Bob*.

Don't be coy. Surely, you don't want me to spell it out for you do you?

Not strictly East Dulwich I know but I went to Dulwich Hamlet Infants and Junior Schools.

Indeed, my definition doesn't appear to be on there at all. But I think dear readers you DO know what my definition is don't you.

A Milf.

Ah yes, thanks Fear & Boozing and as for Mr Abu Hamza, who is still languishing in Belmarsh Prison....where you're still allowed to smoke. Must be a bit difficult with that hook though.

Climbs out of pool, grabs a beer, finds a plate and fills it with Sean's chilli. Wow! that's good and hot. Well done Sean, just what the doctor ordered. Finds lounger and starts stuffing face with a second helping and prepares for an afternoon of sun bathing and generally chilling out.

Top story of the day for me is the bungling officials in Stoke-On-Trent for failing to confirm banning powers in time so people are still happily smoking away in the town's 400 pubs and clubs. :)) And will be able to do so until August 1st.

Wakes up from rather long snooze, good job I plugged myself into a saline drip last night as I'm now feeling right as ninepence and ready for a new day...hmmm chilli and beer, that'll make a fine brunch but I think I'll have a quick dip in the pool first just to freshen up a bit. Slips into shorts and dives in. Oh wow! Come on in the water's lovely.

*Hoorah, finds ciggies, skins up and pours another JD and coke, swills from can of red stripe in other hand. I think I'm bit too relaxed to play darts actually, but I'll deffo have some of that chilli. Gasps!..bloody hell that's hot.*

*Yes, nice place you have here...I'm feeling kinda relaxed already.*

Bollocks to darts, I need a large Jack and pint of the black stuff. Is there fag machine in here?

Afternoon, mind if I join you. I'm gagging for a drink I see me Mr Fear & Boozing has been on the crystal meths again?

Thanks very much Louisa, I shall be booking a table there in the very near future.

Excuse me but has anyone got Le Moulin's number please? I'd like to book a table soon.