What do we do here?

[Nero]

Not sure if this has been done before. (Did a search, but nothing came up.)

I'm a journalist (and like to think that my surfing on this site helps me keep up my zeitgeist.) Nero

[downsouth]

Do you mean, why are we on here?

[mockney piers]

My first thought was 'waste a lot of time and talk nonsense', but I take it you mean jobs in the real world, rather than philosophically on the forum.

SQL and C# programmer for evil multinational media firm.

[downsouth]

Oh, company lawyer for greedy oil giant that is sucking the life blood out of the planet.

[barrymarshall]

journalist covering middle east finance and economics. I only do it for the ker-ching.

[Keef]

Rehabilitation Worker with Visually Impaired Peole in social services.

[spadetownboy]

Forensic Pathology, so if anyone on the site ever gets done in ,you could well end up in my hands.

[Bellenden Belle]

Development officer for arts charity for people with mental ill health.

[ratty]

Supported Housing Manager for Substance Use and Mental Health Homeless People

[Jah Lush]

I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice.

I have been known to remodel train stations on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention.

I translate ethnic slurs for Kenyan refugees. I write award winning operas, and manage time efficiently.

Occasionally, I tread water for three days in a row.

I woo women with my sensuous and Godlike trombone playing.

I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed.

I cook thirty minute brownies in twenty minutes.

I am an expert in stucco, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Peru.

Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, I once single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants.

I play bluegrass cello. I had trials with Manchester United Football Club and am the subject of numerous documentaries.

When I'm bored, I build large suspension bridges in my garden. I enjoy urban hang gliding.

On Wednesdays after work, I repair electrical appliances free of charge.

I am an abstract artist, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless bookie.

Critics worldwide swoon over my original line of corduroy evening wear.

I don't perspire. I am a private citizen, yet I receive fan mail.

I have appeared in "Through The Keyhole" and won the Nobel Peace Prize.

Last summer I toured eastern Europe with a travelling centrifugal-force demonstration.

I run the 100m in 9.65 seconds. My deft floral arrangements have earned me fame in international botany circles. Children trust me.

I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy.

I once read Paradise Lost, Moby Dick and David Copperfield in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire dining room that evening.

I know the exact location of every food item in the supermarket. I have performed several covert operations for the CIA.

I sleep once a week; when I do sleep, I sleep in a chair.

While on holiday in Canada, I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery.

The laws of physics do not apply to me. I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic and my bills are all paid.

On weekends, to let off steam, I participate in full-contact origami.

Years ago I discovered the meaning of life but forgot to write it down.

I have made extraordinary four-course meals using only some vegetables and a Breville toaster. I breed prize winning clams.

I have won bullfights in Madrid, cliff diving competitions in Sri Lanka, and chess competitions in the Kremlin.

I have played Hamlet. I have performed open heart surgery and I have spoken with Elvis but I have never been to Bluewater.

[snorky]

disinformation professional

[georgia]

Nurse managing clinical trials for the European Blood and Bone Marrow Transplantation Group

[AllyCat]

Group Picture Editor for 2 celeb/TV magazines (for my sins!) ...

[Jeremy]

I write trading and risk software for an investment bank... what fun!

[david_carnell]

Political lobbyist

[runs for cover]

[Brendan]

I am the 1998 winner (and current record holder) of the Liverpool to New York doggy paddle.

I once penned the source code for a disk operating system on the back of a beermat and gave it as payment to a lapdancer called Bill.

My life as an adored philanthropist and notable deflowerer of virgins has taken me to all 3 corners of both continents and most of the bits in-between.

When not giving my council to world leaders or answering Hawkins? inane questions I captain an astral darts team consisting of history's most notorious boozers and well known crack shots, Genghis Kahn, Kurt Cobain and Jesus van Nazareth.

It is a well established scientific fact that I am always correct about everything and the most devastatingly handsome male specimen the human race will ever produce.

Unlike that Lush fellow I am too modest to go on about my achievements.

I am also the founding and only member of the tortured, misunderstood and under-appreciated genius that is: Lord Saxonbard's Christmas Haemorrhage and the Three Pints of Sugar Band. Although I am considering leaving due to creative differences.

[Rolo Tomasi]

HR for our Local Council

[*Bob*]

loafer

[Brendan]

I wonder if there are any other kinds of footwear on the forum

[*Bob*]

There are a few old boots

[Brendan]

There is bound to be on something so full of cobblers.

[Mark]

I'm a web/internet person in the process of starting a business doing web/internet things. I'll tell you all about it when the time's right.

[PeckhamRose]

Writer and actor and (to actually earn money) I work from home in copyright law.

Just about to have a play of mine produced in a small but professional London theatre.

Dead excited, me. I'll post a flier when the time's right....

[lozzyloz]

Photographer

[Ant]

I edit books. Not fun ones though. :/