Captain Scarlet

Anyone know of any swinging clubs or dogging locations around Dulwich? I have heard that the grange lane near dulwich college is used by doggers? Any one know of any sordid dirty secrets around Dulwich?. Nice shop in lordship lane as been used for Adult films....[i jest not!]

I agree with Tarot....too much of this lets be nice to other cultures crap. Thats why this country is in such a state.

I must be getting old...I just watched a porn film and thought 'bloody hell, that bed looks comfy'

I had a little accident when I tried to buy some condoms in a public toilet. It said insert money and push knob firmly inwards. Fire brigade were most helpful.

Ive bought a bird table. It said 'self assembly' on the box. I put it in the garden ages ago but the lazy little sod's still havent done it yet.

A friend has admitted to me he is addicted to brake fluid. I was shocked but he says he can stop anytime

Just home from the World Blindfold W*nking Championships! No idea where i came!!!

To impress his new date, a young man went to the rooftop of his apartment building to work on his tan. Not wanting any tan lines, he sunbathed in the nude. Unfortunately, he fell asleep and sunburned his cock. But being very determined, he decided not to miss his date, so he put some ointment on the beast and wrapped it in a bandage. The young man's date, a beautiful blonde, showed up at his apartment for the promised home cooked meal and was treated to a feast. After they finished with dinner they went into the living room to watch a movie. But during the movie, the young man's sunburn started acting up, and after several minutes of extreme discomfort he asked to be excused. A friend had told him that clotted cream was very effective in reducing sunburn pain, so he went to the kitchen, poured a tall glass of cream, dropped his trousers and underpants, then placed his sunburned cock in the cream - he experienced immediate relief. The blonde, wondering what the young man was doing, wandered into the kitchen and found him with his cock still immersed in the glass of cream. With a look of complete amazement, she exclaimed: "So that?s how you load those things!!!?

Lol. Why not set up a adult contact night on the Forum? any lonely people feeling a bit fruity post on the forum you want to meet for some slap n tickle.

yard

costs

Agree with you roads are getting too busy plus the standard of driving as gone down hill with most people!.

what do you call a lesbian Dinosaur --------------------------------------------------------------- ALICKALOTAPUSS

The lead actor in the local production of Aladdin was anally raped by the gay genie on stage last night. To be fair, the audience tried to warn him

Was at an Al Quiada christmas Party last year. Not much celebrating or having fun, but the fastest game of pass the parcel you'll ever see.

beefy

There was a young pirate named Bates Who danced a fandango on skates - He fell on his cutlass, Which rendered him nutless And perfectly useless on dates!

The following is the transcript of an actual radio conversation in October 1995, between a US Navy ship and The British authorities,off the Scottish North coast. The transcript was released by the MoD on 10/10/95. BRITISH : Please divert your course 15 degrees to the South, to avoid collision. US Navy : Recommend you divert YOUR course 15 degrees to the North to avoid a collision. BRITISH : Negative.You will have to divert your course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision. US Navy : This is the Captain of US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course. BRITISH : Negative. I say again. You will have to divert your course. US NAVY: THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER USS LINCOLN. THE SECOND LARGEST SHIP IN THE UNITED STATES' ATLANTIC FLEET. ACCOMPANIED BY THREE DESTROYERS, THREE CRUISERS AND NUMEROUS SUPPORT VESSELS. DEMAND THAT YOU CHANGE YOUR COURSE 15 DEGREES NORTH, THAT'S 15 DEGREES NORTH, OR COUNTER MEASURES WILL BE UNDERTAKEN TO ENSURE THE SAFETY OF THIS SHIP. BRITISH : We are a lighthouse. F*** off.

Arnold Schwarzenegger, George Clooney and Brad Pitt attend a screentest for a new film entitled "The Lives of the World's Greatest Composers". Clooney says "I'll be Beethoven because I can play the piano". Brad says "I'll be Vivaldi as I can play the violin". Arnie just stands there for a couple minutes, before saying in a deep voice "I'll be Bach..."

Annette Curtain Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Tarot Wrote: > -------------------------------------------------- > ----- > > Where has Scribe gone. hunting. > > He's been "Culled" > > N:) The medication must have kicked in then!....take the blue pill!

binary_star Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Fox, hunting with firearms: > > http://www.fwi.co.uk/blogs/rural-life/Fox_hunting. > jpg I must admit that picture did make me laugh!!

A man walked into a pub and asked the barman for a strong drink, "I'm still shaking", he said anxiously, "I spent all afternoon at the hospital having a mole removed from my penis". "I tell you what", he went on,"that's the last time I have sex with a mole!"

Yeh...but any lapdancing or stripping clubs?B)

I ve heard Gary glitter as pre -ordered the dvd box set of the series!

Young lad pulls an older woman at a club. She's 58 but looks very good for her age. On the way back to her house bloke is thinking mmm! i bet her daughter is hot. When out of the blue she asks if he'd like a 'Sportsman's Double'? "Wots that?" he asks. "It's a Mother & daughter threesome!" he says. "WOW YES PLEASE" So as they go in her front door, she puts the hall light on & shouts "Mum put your teeth in, he's up for it"!!