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bigbadwolf

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Everything posted by bigbadwolf

  1. Ha ha ha, that was good MM.
  2. Ask Jah Lush.
  3. Hello Moos, we've all missed you.
  4. Get your tongue out of her arse Maurice!
  5. Not to worry DM. Don't fret. I'll look after your Poppets. Oh I just know that me and your progeny will get along swell and have soooooo much fun. I'll be at your door at 7 a.m sharp to get them fed, dressed and ready for school. While they're at school I'll play house and tend to the gardens and prepare a wholesome meal ready on the table for you and your dearests return. In fact you'll never know I'm there. I wont need paying just the occasional 'favour' now and again.
  6. Jah Lush Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > You had a bed Atila? You lucky lucky bastard. They don't know that they're born do they Jah. I remember when my dad would slap me upside the head with his ration book.
  7. Twig buddies? It's like watching Castaway 2000 and what has happened to that womans teeth! Does she chew tobacco? I bet they all stink.
  8. Bloody hell, you lot don't know how lucky you were. I'd get the belt or if I was very naughty the cane!
  9. MICHAEL!!! Bring the salts, she's fallen over again.
  10. Hang en high drop em hard.....am I on the right track Brendan?
  11. Hang em where Brendan?
  12. You've fallen in love with her haven't you Maurice. Don't worry, it's happened to all of us. I remember when she cast her spell on me like it was yesterday........... Me, Quids and Marmora Man were playing hoopla on the outer lawn of the EDF mansion whilst David Carnell was preparing some Pimms. Halfway through the game I thought I heard someone calling my name, "Quids, did you hear that?" "hear what" , "I thought I heard someone calling me by my name" , "MM, did you hear it" , "No I didn't, stop messing about...it's your go". We carried on playing and then I heard it very clearly. It's seductive invite lilted across the garden and infected my soul with a craving to seek out it's origin, I felt like a sailor trapped in fog being called ever closer to the rocks by the sirens. It was getting clearer now but for some reason the others couldn't hear it. A brisk wind rustled the leaves and thunder clouds gathered on the horizon. I couldn't fight the calling any longer. "I.....I.....I'm just nipping indoors for a bit.....carry on without me." As I crossed the lawn and entered the house my summons was growing much louder. I followed it around the house until I stumbled across a door I'd never seen before. I pushed open the door and entered a room fit for Aphrodite herself. The room was oppulance itself. A ferero Roche Pyramid on a silver table a wardrobe that would cause Harvey Nichols to weep and all her minions to do her bidding. Michael P was wearing a waistcoat, Fez and walked around crashing a pair of symbols together whilst Brum recited a shopping list that would bankrupt the Sultan of Brunei in a heartbeat. She'd also had Mikecg frozen in Carbonite like Han Solo in Starwars. "Are you the one they call bigbadwolf." I stiffened and everything and everybody fell silent. "Well.....are you?" I couldn't see her but I could make out a shadow behind a screen and I could feel her gaze upon my mortal flesh. "Yes.....It is I" "Good.....come closer" I approached the screen but just as I was about to lay eyes on her a cloud of glittering dust billowed from under the screen and engulfed me. "Listen carefully Mr Wolf, I want you to do something for me" "Anything Priestess" "I want you to go to Somerfield and buy me a copy of County life, Grazia, Racing Post, 40 B+H and a bottle of Gordons, understand?" "Right away your highness" All of a sudden I heard a crashing noise and spun around as Marmora Man, Quids and David Carnell came swooping through the window to rescue me. They scooped me up and carried me away whilst I could hear her shrieking that she'd get even one day. I still remember her perfume though.
  13. Pagan T.V. I wonder if reception is dependant on the moons transit.....or if you have to sacrifice your eldest child for the H.D package.
  14. Yeah come on *Bob*, did you get a 'happy ending'?
  15. Was it the one where you get Champagne?
  16. PROSouthwark.....this is the way we role. Even Maurice. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NnoI7Be4VZk
  17. Power to the poor.
  18. PROSouthwark Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- We have moved very little from the 1800s. Speak for yourself. I've got 7 bedrooms and ones for the dog.
  19. PROSouthwark Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > The movement is aimed at the poor and oppressed. > Join us. So you're based in Nunhead.
  20. It was a while back jen but I'd say that the little pikey kid was about 10ish. Erskine O'Mally and the rest of his brood were of various ages from the toothless to the spineless. The whole thing was over very quickly and we were all dealt with quiclkly but I'd had so much coke I wasn't thinking straight. If you need a comparison of our collective behaviour, travellers and taxpayers alike then tune into an episode of street wars on sky three.
  21. Can I bring Sean along as well?
  22. I'll be round in about 15 minutes *Bob*.
  23. Thank you Michael, can you pass me my sun hat from the hat stand seeing as I can't reach. I'd also like one of you to clip my fur as well.
  24. A bit wacko if you ask me.
  25. Did it yourself eh *Bob*, in the garden as well. What are your neighbours opinion of you having a w@nk in full view.
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